I know I�m probably going to get flamed by some people here for this, but I don�t care, so here goes� Cap�n�s first proper rant:

1: Poorly drawn porn is sick.
I don�t care what kind of sick bastard child you are, or what planet you call home, but if you�re going to draw porn that�s going to be viewed on this planet, please, either find a way to make it half-tasteful or keep it to yourself. Remember, you�re drawing PORN; the purpose of porn is to arouse, therefore porn that fails to meet this end is meaningless if it does not have some other artistic value. When I see some crap-quality picture of some stick-figure-like characters spooging all over the place that looks like it was half-assed by a fourth-grader, it�s not arousing! In fact, it�s often so obscenely tasteless, I feel like I�m gonna vomit! The first thing you may ask yourself when you see this trash is �should fourth-graders be posting porn in the first place?� If you answered no to this question, congratulations! You have some common sense! I don�t mean to pick apart people who are still learning to draw � that�s mean, and not my intent, but what I can�t help saying is that if you can�t draw well, then learn to draw something other than porn! And if you simply can�t live without drawing stick-figure spooge, then keep your sick drawings to yourself. Simple as that, thanks.

2: �extra bits�
In addition to the above point, there�s that issue that some people have with drawing those �extra bits�. Now, I realize that a lot of people out there can appreciate herm porn more than I can, and let�s face it, as a straight male who has no interest in looking at anyone else�s dick, I�m biased. Nevertheless, there are still those places where people quite simply cross the boundaries of good taste, and quite frankly, they�re nearly always poorly drawn to boot. For example, how practical do you think is a guy with ten dicks, each as big as his (or �hir�, if it�s a herm) torso? I mean, what the fuck is he gonna do with them anyway? Fuck 10 blue whales at once? Perhaps just some oversized alien lifeform with an unnecessary number of female reproductive organs? Besides that, where is he supposed to put them when he�s not looking to bludgeon someone to death with his 500-pound wang cluster? If you�re gonna draw a penis for everyone to see, draw it well, and one criterion for drawing schlongs is that they�re at least halfway practical. I know all the kiddies these days want to grow up to be Doug Winger, but you really don�t have to! You can be loved without giving yourself an 8-foot dick and boobs the size of Vermont. Believe it or not, the measure of a man (or herm) is not the length of his (or hir) PENIS. I know I�m getting off-track here, but the point I�m trying to get to is that if you�re into that far-out shit, that�s fine. Find a special-interest group and circulate pictures, or keep them to yourself, or maybe just wait until FA has refrained filter criteria that actually WORKS. The bottom line is that taste may be in the eye of the beholder, but JPEGs are in the eyes of everyone who sees them � think about if they want to, before you show them.

�and that�s all for today.