Oh Father Oh Father, why don't you care about me?
15 years ago
Hey Lil' Kids! I gonna tell you a story from the tragic and draatic book called "Real Life"
It's about my father *sighs*
Today My Thought just kinda fly by and suddenly My Dad came up into my Head...
My Father...was the kind of man who...saw the bottom of the Beer Bottle more often as his own Son, he was an alcoholic and he came home drunken very often from his "workplace" wich was his Restaurant where he dran his own stuff all the time with his friend, of course he lost the Restaurant...and he lost it a second time.
He was very aggressicve when he was drunken, dunno my Mom and my Dad fights like everyday these times with me inbetewwn them.
When I was 9-10 My Mom left my Dad, it was a horrible day when she kicked out my Father from our place, she just couldn't take it anymore..of course but I just didn't understand it, well we moved away....
My Father knew where we lived and he wasn't forbidden to visit his children...
But he never did!
10 Years..he never visited me, never phoned me and never wrote me Letter I didn'T hear a thing from him, and this was what i mentioned...one half of my whole life i Lived without my fAther...
And it left I wound in my Heart, soo deep It just healed with alot of years, but it left a Scar on my Heart wich will never disappear and sometimes it hurts so bad I could cry again, but I try to hold back my tears.
I can live with it now, I'm not so down anymore I was with 12 I guess, it's just a terrible feeling, knowing that one of your most important persons in Life don't give a Shit about you anymore, you feel lonely, you feel useless, you feel like it was all your fault and you begin too hate yourself, I did, today I understand it a little more, but it still hurts, it changed me when I was a kid...
Don't get me wrong I hate this man I convict him, for that what he has done with me and my Mother and my Little Sister, I sworn to become never like him, To be honest: I never drank alcohol my whole life, exepct for new year, I get forced by my Mom to drink a Glass of sparkling whine, but that's all. My Fther caome from Portugal. Yes, Im half German and Half Portuguese. He was the kind of man wich saw women as lower object, but I didn't I respect all women for that what they are: Humans like you and me
But I just got one Question: "Why?" Why he just don't care about me? I never did something to him, did my Mom hurt his pride so much it makes don't wana see his Son? Why? Ten Years he left me alone and I just wanna know why...
I don't even know if he's still alive, well I heard that he openend a Restaurant again...and lost it a third time...
Yeah...that's all Sorry I did the Emo today Sorry I will get over it, Tommorrow I will be fine Again I guess, thanks for reading! ^_^
Well at least y Stepfather wasn't that cruel he just left me 6 Years without a reason, Fathers r AWESOME, right?
It's about my father *sighs*
Today My Thought just kinda fly by and suddenly My Dad came up into my Head...
My Father...was the kind of man who...saw the bottom of the Beer Bottle more often as his own Son, he was an alcoholic and he came home drunken very often from his "workplace" wich was his Restaurant where he dran his own stuff all the time with his friend, of course he lost the Restaurant...and he lost it a second time.
He was very aggressicve when he was drunken, dunno my Mom and my Dad fights like everyday these times with me inbetewwn them.
When I was 9-10 My Mom left my Dad, it was a horrible day when she kicked out my Father from our place, she just couldn't take it anymore..of course but I just didn't understand it, well we moved away....
My Father knew where we lived and he wasn't forbidden to visit his children...
But he never did!
10 Years..he never visited me, never phoned me and never wrote me Letter I didn'T hear a thing from him, and this was what i mentioned...one half of my whole life i Lived without my fAther...
And it left I wound in my Heart, soo deep It just healed with alot of years, but it left a Scar on my Heart wich will never disappear and sometimes it hurts so bad I could cry again, but I try to hold back my tears.
I can live with it now, I'm not so down anymore I was with 12 I guess, it's just a terrible feeling, knowing that one of your most important persons in Life don't give a Shit about you anymore, you feel lonely, you feel useless, you feel like it was all your fault and you begin too hate yourself, I did, today I understand it a little more, but it still hurts, it changed me when I was a kid...
Don't get me wrong I hate this man I convict him, for that what he has done with me and my Mother and my Little Sister, I sworn to become never like him, To be honest: I never drank alcohol my whole life, exepct for new year, I get forced by my Mom to drink a Glass of sparkling whine, but that's all. My Fther caome from Portugal. Yes, Im half German and Half Portuguese. He was the kind of man wich saw women as lower object, but I didn't I respect all women for that what they are: Humans like you and me
But I just got one Question: "Why?" Why he just don't care about me? I never did something to him, did my Mom hurt his pride so much it makes don't wana see his Son? Why? Ten Years he left me alone and I just wanna know why...
I don't even know if he's still alive, well I heard that he openend a Restaurant again...and lost it a third time...
Yeah...that's all Sorry I did the Emo today Sorry I will get over it, Tommorrow I will be fine Again I guess, thanks for reading! ^_^
Well at least y Stepfather wasn't that cruel he just left me 6 Years without a reason, Fathers r AWESOME, right?
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