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Sex Meme [Jason]
15 years ago
General
I was bored and randomly decided to do this. Derp. Stolen from 
As far as I know, this is a meme to answer for yourself, but you know what? I think it's more fun to answer with characters.
1. Is there anyone on your friends list you would ever consider having sex with?
No. I don't go on any of those social networks. Never been my thing.
2. Sex in the morning, afternoon or night?
I prefer night as it's more private, but I could do morning and the afternoon if I wanted.
3. What side of the bed do you sleep on?
The right side.
4. Do you masturbate?
Uh, yeah? Who doesn't?
5. How often? Lately?
Ahh...yeah. Every morning, in the afternoon, and before I go to bed...
6. Have you ever taken your clothes off for money?
Fuck no. What am I? Some kinda slut?
7. Do you prefer showers or baths?
Showers.
8. Have you ever had sex in the shower or the bath?
Uh, yeah. Like, once or twice.
9. Do you watch/read pornography?
Yeah, but who doesn't?
10. Do you want someone aggressive or passive in bed?
Passive. I don't go for aggressive chicks.
11. Do you love someone on your friends list?
No. I don't have one.
12. Do you know all the people on your friends list?
Don't have one...
13. would you choose money or love?
Love. That shit's important in a relationship.
14. Your top three favorite kinks in bed?
I'm a pretty plain and simple guy. I just like blow jobs, hand jobs and old fashioned fuckin'. I don't do any of that kinky shit.
15. Has anyone ever gone beyond your personal line of respect sexually?
So many fuckin' times, I've lost count.
16. Where is the most romantic place you have had sex?
I ain't a romantic, but I can proudly say I've fucked on the beach while the sun was goin' down. Heh
17. Where is the weirdest place you have had sex?
Don't have one. Any sex I've had is either kept in the bedroom or the living room.
18. Have you ever been caught having sex?
Yeah, by a couple of friends, my uncle, and uh, Des' mom...
19. Have you ever been to a strip club?
Yeah. A few times. One of my friends likes to drag me to 'em occasionally. I don't complain or anythin', but I don't feel comfortable watchin' chicks strip, or givin' me lap dances when I already got a girl. I mean, she doesn't mind, but it still don't feel right... It's made even worse if Des is sittin' right fuckin' next to me.
20. Ever been to a bar just to get sex?
Hell no. I already got a girl, and I don't drink. So I got no reason to go to a bar.
21. Ever been kicked out of a bar or a club for sexual reasons?
No, 'cause I've never been in a bar. Well, I mean I have, but that was also because my friend dragged me to it. He was the one to get kicked out, though.
22. Ever been picked up in a bar?
I've been hit on in a bar, but no. I turn 'em down flat. Most who try gettin' in my pants are fuckin' ugly and got some kinda STD or somethin'. I mean, I don't know if they do, but I ain't takin' any chances.
23. Have you ever kissed or had sex with someone of the same sex?
Ugh....I've been kissed so many damn times, it ain't funny. Never had sex with a dude though, and I plan to keep it that way.
24. What's your sexuality?
100% straight. I only get boners from watchin' chicks. And I will only fuck chicks.
25. Had sex in a movie theater?
No, but I was given a blow job....Well, half of one. Des stopped half way because she couldn't keep her fuckin' eyes off the movie screen...
26. Had sex in a bathroom?
Yeah, in the shower.
27. Have you ever had sex at work?
No. My ass would get fired if I did that shit. It sounds hot, sure, but it ain't worth losin' my job over.
28. Have you ever been in an "adult" store?
Yeah, several times, much to my embarrassment.
29. Bought something from an adult store?
No, but a friend did.
30. Do you own any sex toys?
Fuck no. Keep that shit away from me.
31. If yes, how many and what are they?
No. Just no.
32. Does anyone have naughty pics of you or are you on film?
I wouldn't doubt that....
33. Have you ever had sex with someone and called them the wrong name?
No.
34. Have you ever had phone sex?
I tried, but Des ain't good at it.
35. Have you ever had cyber sex?
No. Why the fuck would I wanna do that when I got the real thing? Doesn't make any fuckin' sense.
36. Do you think oral sex constitutes as a form of intercourse?
No. Blow jobs are nice, but I prefer sex. A blow job ain't enough for me.
37. What's your favorite sexual position?
Doggy style. I like missionary, too, and a bit of the cowgirl position.
38. What's your favorite sex act?
Help gettin' my girl off while I get myself off.
39. Have you ever had sex with more than one person at a time?
No. I only have sex with my girl.
40. Who do you think has the guts to repost this?
Dunno. Maybe Ricky. I don't really care.
As far as I know, this is a meme to answer for yourself, but you know what? I think it's more fun to answer with characters.
1. Is there anyone on your friends list you would ever consider having sex with?
No. I don't go on any of those social networks. Never been my thing.
2. Sex in the morning, afternoon or night?
I prefer night as it's more private, but I could do morning and the afternoon if I wanted.
3. What side of the bed do you sleep on?
The right side.
4. Do you masturbate?
Uh, yeah? Who doesn't?
5. How often? Lately?
Ahh...yeah. Every morning, in the afternoon, and before I go to bed...
6. Have you ever taken your clothes off for money?
Fuck no. What am I? Some kinda slut?
7. Do you prefer showers or baths?
Showers.
8. Have you ever had sex in the shower or the bath?
Uh, yeah. Like, once or twice.
9. Do you watch/read pornography?
Yeah, but who doesn't?
10. Do you want someone aggressive or passive in bed?
Passive. I don't go for aggressive chicks.
11. Do you love someone on your friends list?
No. I don't have one.
12. Do you know all the people on your friends list?
Don't have one...
13. would you choose money or love?
Love. That shit's important in a relationship.
14. Your top three favorite kinks in bed?
I'm a pretty plain and simple guy. I just like blow jobs, hand jobs and old fashioned fuckin'. I don't do any of that kinky shit.
15. Has anyone ever gone beyond your personal line of respect sexually?
So many fuckin' times, I've lost count.
16. Where is the most romantic place you have had sex?
I ain't a romantic, but I can proudly say I've fucked on the beach while the sun was goin' down. Heh
17. Where is the weirdest place you have had sex?
Don't have one. Any sex I've had is either kept in the bedroom or the living room.
18. Have you ever been caught having sex?
Yeah, by a couple of friends, my uncle, and uh, Des' mom...
19. Have you ever been to a strip club?
Yeah. A few times. One of my friends likes to drag me to 'em occasionally. I don't complain or anythin', but I don't feel comfortable watchin' chicks strip, or givin' me lap dances when I already got a girl. I mean, she doesn't mind, but it still don't feel right... It's made even worse if Des is sittin' right fuckin' next to me.
20. Ever been to a bar just to get sex?
Hell no. I already got a girl, and I don't drink. So I got no reason to go to a bar.
21. Ever been kicked out of a bar or a club for sexual reasons?
No, 'cause I've never been in a bar. Well, I mean I have, but that was also because my friend dragged me to it. He was the one to get kicked out, though.
22. Ever been picked up in a bar?
I've been hit on in a bar, but no. I turn 'em down flat. Most who try gettin' in my pants are fuckin' ugly and got some kinda STD or somethin'. I mean, I don't know if they do, but I ain't takin' any chances.
23. Have you ever kissed or had sex with someone of the same sex?
Ugh....I've been kissed so many damn times, it ain't funny. Never had sex with a dude though, and I plan to keep it that way.
24. What's your sexuality?
100% straight. I only get boners from watchin' chicks. And I will only fuck chicks.
25. Had sex in a movie theater?
No, but I was given a blow job....Well, half of one. Des stopped half way because she couldn't keep her fuckin' eyes off the movie screen...
26. Had sex in a bathroom?
Yeah, in the shower.
27. Have you ever had sex at work?
No. My ass would get fired if I did that shit. It sounds hot, sure, but it ain't worth losin' my job over.
28. Have you ever been in an "adult" store?
Yeah, several times, much to my embarrassment.
29. Bought something from an adult store?
No, but a friend did.
30. Do you own any sex toys?
Fuck no. Keep that shit away from me.
31. If yes, how many and what are they?
No. Just no.
32. Does anyone have naughty pics of you or are you on film?
I wouldn't doubt that....
33. Have you ever had sex with someone and called them the wrong name?
No.
34. Have you ever had phone sex?
I tried, but Des ain't good at it.
35. Have you ever had cyber sex?
No. Why the fuck would I wanna do that when I got the real thing? Doesn't make any fuckin' sense.
36. Do you think oral sex constitutes as a form of intercourse?
No. Blow jobs are nice, but I prefer sex. A blow job ain't enough for me.
37. What's your favorite sexual position?
Doggy style. I like missionary, too, and a bit of the cowgirl position.
38. What's your favorite sex act?
Help gettin' my girl off while I get myself off.
39. Have you ever had sex with more than one person at a time?
No. I only have sex with my girl.
40. Who do you think has the guts to repost this?
Dunno. Maybe Ricky. I don't really care.
AND MY GAWD. Every time you mentioned Des, you got her spot on! It was awesome. XD Couldn't keep her eyes off the movie screen. That is SOOO what would happen.
YOU NEED TO DO MORE OF THESE! XD
do fenris or zeke next!
If you really want a a dude with a Texan accent, please see my character Vincent. He does the same thing, but his grammar is even worse. His yours sounds like yer, his for's sound like fer, he says fellow as fella or feller. He says to like ta or tuh, sometimes says you like ya, just as jus', dropping the 'T' and the kicker, says remember like 'member. XP
Prime example! http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/2112868/ :D
Thank you for making me rofl a little bit ^=^