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Really odd contest! -HUGE- prizes!
17 years ago
Sometimes I wonder whether I'm a sap for doing stuff like this, or whether people who enter this are more sappy than I...
So anyway, an associate of mine said, "Hey, Kit! I've got this great idea for a contest! I'll give you the details and I want you to promote it to FA and beyond! Be completely truthful, but feel free to embellish as much as you need to." He then proceeded to give me the details.
I thought about the details. I thought to myself at first that this guy is utterly insane. Then I realized, "It's just so stupid, it might actually work. I mean, look at the memes that flood through here like a group of teenyboppers at the mall when the newest Claire's opens. If people do that stuff, then this contest may go off without a hitch."
So I decided to post this journal. Honestly, not much more than that, really... Will it work? Who knows?
Ah, yes! I can see you slavering over the mention of Huge Prizes! So I guess it's time for me to mention the
GRAND PRIZE of $10,000
and
Runner Up prizes of $5,000, $1,000, and $500
that you could find in other contests, but almost invariably won't find in this one. In fact, when I asked my associate about the prizes, he smiled cryptically and muttered something about the prizes being a secretive secret. So, along the lines of being completely honest (since I embellished quite well a few lines up, if you ask me personally): I think there may not be any prizes at all! Muahahaha! I guess technically there COULD be prizes, but they may be no more than a pat on the back and the self-satisfaction of having won something as completely inane as this contest. (Something you really wouldn't want to write home to Mom about) The prizes could even be the huge groans that come from you when you realize just what you did. Who knows? Hype it up though, that's important!
"But just what IS this potentially prizeless contest, Kit?" you may ask...
Go ahead. Ask it. Seriously. Just say it out loud. Do it. You know you want to. Don't worry if anybody looks at you funny. Done it? GREAT!
This is a two part contest:
Part 1: Qualification.
Part 2: "WTFDIJDA?"
So, here are the basic things to consider: You do NOT need to be a good artist to enter. Heck, you don't even need to be an artist if you really want to write a short (PLEASE I mean really seriously SHORT) story as your entry instead. You DO need to take this seriously though.
...
Who am I kidding? There is no way to take this seriously. Not a chance in Mogbertha's cleavage in fact.
Right. Part 1: Qualification.
"Draw an anthropomorphic endorphin."
Go ahead. Say it. You know you want to say this one out loud too. I said it.
"WHAT?!" (Also feel free to scratch your head and look up "endorphin" somewhere)
Yep, you heard right. Draw an anthropomorphic endorphin. Well, that or write a story about one. Either way. Silly enough yet? It gets better. Not only will YOUR submission be rated and scored (Based on a completely and totally secret set of criteria that even I don't know right now, so hopefully my associate doesn't pull anything even weirder out of his hat for this. All I know is that it will be wholly subjective, silly, and otherwise completely irreverent. Catch the judges' eyes type thing.), it gets even better.
Get OTHER people to enter the contest too. If they enter and (Pick one: A: admit that you got them to, B: finger you as the culprit, C: babble your name incoherently-yet-coherently-enough-for-us-to-know-their-insanity-is-truly-your-fault), you get half of THEIR point total added to your rating score. But wait, there's EVEN MORE! The judges will be tracking ONE MORE downline from each of the people you convince/cajole/blackmail/bribe into entering, so each of the people that THEY directly get to enter will also have 25% of -THEIR- score added to your own. OMG!!! It's a meme and a pyramid scheme contest all wrapped into one!
Right... So in order to QUALIFY, you need to A: Draw the endorphin. and B: Get at least one other person to draw an endorphin who ALSO gets at least one more person to draw one.
Example:
Asalfred draws an anthro endorphin. Asalfred enters it into the contest. Asalfred is not qualified yet. Asalfred convinced Asal to write a story about an anthropomorphic endorphin. Asal fingers Asalfred (Ooooo!) then writes the story after washing her finger and says she entered because of Asalfred. Asalfred still isn't QUITE qualified, but he's closer.
Asalfred also convinces Fred to draw... you know... I'm just gonna call it an AE from now on, because that's getting silly to type... draw an AE. Fred just accuses Asalfred of being the one who got him into the contest, and manages to also blackmail Ed into drawing an AE as well. As soon as Ed enters and places the blame on Fred, Asalfred is suddenly qualified!
Not only does Asalfred get full points for his entry, but he gets half the points Asal and Fred earn, and 25% of the points Ed earns.
Making sense so far? Good.... Because I'm almost completely lost.
So, now that Asalfred is qualified, he can move on to Part 2...
WTFDIJDA?
Now that you have warmed up by drawing something completely inane that you probably had to look up the definition of, then scratch your head and try to figure out how to anthropomorphize it, you can get on to the REAL fun part:
Pick something else either equally inane as an endorphin to anthropomorphize and create art about, or much more inane than that there endorphin. Something that normally would (or should) never be anthropomorphized. I'd give examples, but then people would cheat and steal them instead of coming up with ideas of their own so we'd have to block the use of anything that I gave as an example (You know, examples like FA itself, twisty straws, orgasms, PET scans, UPS, etc), so I won't give any (more) examples, since that would be unfair to people who had the great idea of the example before they found out that my stating it as an example caused it to become a disqualified idea.
Oh, yeah... That whole paragraph was to pick something. So... Um... Draw it. Or write about it. Then when you are done, you can proudly exclaim "WTFDIJDA?" (Or possibly "WTFDIJWAA?") and submit it as your multiplier entry.
Yes, you heard me right. Multiplier entry. You get scored on your part two entry (Just yours this time, sorry), and your Part 1 score is MULTIPLIED by your Part 2 score.
EXCITING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (That's enough !'s... really...)
Then when all the dust clears, SOMEBODY emerges as the WINNER! Everybody else can just deal with being losers. However they can take gratification in the fact that they ARE losers, because so is everybody who wasn't insane enough to even enter. That's honestly probably a good group to be a part of. (Look! I'm being completely honest again!)
So what do you think? Will people shake their heads and call this nuts? Will a straggling few make half-hearted attempts to not look silly while taking this seriously? Will this contest sweep the globe and result in billions of drawings of anthro endorphins? Will there BE a huge prize of some sort, or just a huge communal chuckle that passes like a fart through the cheeks of FA? NOBODY KNOWS!!!!!!!!! (Pant... My ! finger is getting tired now)
Important clarifications on some things:
Each person can only enter once! Or as many times as they want... and they can place the blame on anybody they want for each entry. So yes, you can trade off qualifying pictures if you have enough people. HOWEVER, only your highest-scoring picture counts towards your OWN score.
I (or my associate or any of the judges, who decline to be revealed, so probably just I) need to be made aware of all entries, otherwise you can't get credit.
TLDR VERSION
Step 1: Draw an anthropomorphic endorphin. (or write about one. SHORT short story)
Step 2: Get at least one <some person> to do the same.
Step 3: Have that person get at least one more <another person> to do the same.
Step 4: You are now qualified and your base score is the sum of your entry plus 50% of the score of all children entries plus 25% of the score of all grandchild entries.
Step 5: Draw or write about SOMETHING that normally would or should never be anthropomorphized.
Step 6: Your base score is multiplied by the score of the second item.
Step 7: Get the best score.
Step 8: Win (Or lose. People have to do that too)
Step 9: ????
Step 10: PROFIT!!!
THE DEADLINE FOR THIS CONTEST IS MAY 31st 2008! Get to it!
(Being completely honest, I wouldn't put more than maybe ten minutes into it... But then again, my associate has been known in the past to go into the mall and empty a backpack load of $1000 worth of dollar bills off the second story onto the first story below, then watch the chaos ensue just for fun... so you never know.)
So anyway, an associate of mine said, "Hey, Kit! I've got this great idea for a contest! I'll give you the details and I want you to promote it to FA and beyond! Be completely truthful, but feel free to embellish as much as you need to." He then proceeded to give me the details.
I thought about the details. I thought to myself at first that this guy is utterly insane. Then I realized, "It's just so stupid, it might actually work. I mean, look at the memes that flood through here like a group of teenyboppers at the mall when the newest Claire's opens. If people do that stuff, then this contest may go off without a hitch."
So I decided to post this journal. Honestly, not much more than that, really... Will it work? Who knows?
Ah, yes! I can see you slavering over the mention of Huge Prizes! So I guess it's time for me to mention the
GRAND PRIZE of $10,000
and
Runner Up prizes of $5,000, $1,000, and $500
that you could find in other contests, but almost invariably won't find in this one. In fact, when I asked my associate about the prizes, he smiled cryptically and muttered something about the prizes being a secretive secret. So, along the lines of being completely honest (since I embellished quite well a few lines up, if you ask me personally): I think there may not be any prizes at all! Muahahaha! I guess technically there COULD be prizes, but they may be no more than a pat on the back and the self-satisfaction of having won something as completely inane as this contest. (Something you really wouldn't want to write home to Mom about) The prizes could even be the huge groans that come from you when you realize just what you did. Who knows? Hype it up though, that's important!
"But just what IS this potentially prizeless contest, Kit?" you may ask...
Go ahead. Ask it. Seriously. Just say it out loud. Do it. You know you want to. Don't worry if anybody looks at you funny. Done it? GREAT!
This is a two part contest:
Part 1: Qualification.
Part 2: "WTFDIJDA?"
So, here are the basic things to consider: You do NOT need to be a good artist to enter. Heck, you don't even need to be an artist if you really want to write a short (PLEASE I mean really seriously SHORT) story as your entry instead. You DO need to take this seriously though.
...
Who am I kidding? There is no way to take this seriously. Not a chance in Mogbertha's cleavage in fact.
Right. Part 1: Qualification.
"Draw an anthropomorphic endorphin."
Go ahead. Say it. You know you want to say this one out loud too. I said it.
"WHAT?!" (Also feel free to scratch your head and look up "endorphin" somewhere)
Yep, you heard right. Draw an anthropomorphic endorphin. Well, that or write a story about one. Either way. Silly enough yet? It gets better. Not only will YOUR submission be rated and scored (Based on a completely and totally secret set of criteria that even I don't know right now, so hopefully my associate doesn't pull anything even weirder out of his hat for this. All I know is that it will be wholly subjective, silly, and otherwise completely irreverent. Catch the judges' eyes type thing.), it gets even better.
Get OTHER people to enter the contest too. If they enter and (Pick one: A: admit that you got them to, B: finger you as the culprit, C: babble your name incoherently-yet-coherently-enough-for-us-to-know-their-insanity-is-truly-your-fault), you get half of THEIR point total added to your rating score. But wait, there's EVEN MORE! The judges will be tracking ONE MORE downline from each of the people you convince/cajole/blackmail/bribe into entering, so each of the people that THEY directly get to enter will also have 25% of -THEIR- score added to your own. OMG!!! It's a meme and a pyramid scheme contest all wrapped into one!
Right... So in order to QUALIFY, you need to A: Draw the endorphin. and B: Get at least one other person to draw an endorphin who ALSO gets at least one more person to draw one.
Example:
Asalfred draws an anthro endorphin. Asalfred enters it into the contest. Asalfred is not qualified yet. Asalfred convinced Asal to write a story about an anthropomorphic endorphin. Asal fingers Asalfred (Ooooo!) then writes the story after washing her finger and says she entered because of Asalfred. Asalfred still isn't QUITE qualified, but he's closer.
Asalfred also convinces Fred to draw... you know... I'm just gonna call it an AE from now on, because that's getting silly to type... draw an AE. Fred just accuses Asalfred of being the one who got him into the contest, and manages to also blackmail Ed into drawing an AE as well. As soon as Ed enters and places the blame on Fred, Asalfred is suddenly qualified!
Not only does Asalfred get full points for his entry, but he gets half the points Asal and Fred earn, and 25% of the points Ed earns.
Making sense so far? Good.... Because I'm almost completely lost.
So, now that Asalfred is qualified, he can move on to Part 2...
WTFDIJDA?
Now that you have warmed up by drawing something completely inane that you probably had to look up the definition of, then scratch your head and try to figure out how to anthropomorphize it, you can get on to the REAL fun part:
Pick something else either equally inane as an endorphin to anthropomorphize and create art about, or much more inane than that there endorphin. Something that normally would (or should) never be anthropomorphized. I'd give examples, but then people would cheat and steal them instead of coming up with ideas of their own so we'd have to block the use of anything that I gave as an example (You know, examples like FA itself, twisty straws, orgasms, PET scans, UPS, etc), so I won't give any (more) examples, since that would be unfair to people who had the great idea of the example before they found out that my stating it as an example caused it to become a disqualified idea.
Oh, yeah... That whole paragraph was to pick something. So... Um... Draw it. Or write about it. Then when you are done, you can proudly exclaim "WTFDIJDA?" (Or possibly "WTFDIJWAA?") and submit it as your multiplier entry.
Yes, you heard me right. Multiplier entry. You get scored on your part two entry (Just yours this time, sorry), and your Part 1 score is MULTIPLIED by your Part 2 score.
EXCITING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (That's enough !'s... really...)
Then when all the dust clears, SOMEBODY emerges as the WINNER! Everybody else can just deal with being losers. However they can take gratification in the fact that they ARE losers, because so is everybody who wasn't insane enough to even enter. That's honestly probably a good group to be a part of. (Look! I'm being completely honest again!)
So what do you think? Will people shake their heads and call this nuts? Will a straggling few make half-hearted attempts to not look silly while taking this seriously? Will this contest sweep the globe and result in billions of drawings of anthro endorphins? Will there BE a huge prize of some sort, or just a huge communal chuckle that passes like a fart through the cheeks of FA? NOBODY KNOWS!!!!!!!!! (Pant... My ! finger is getting tired now)
Important clarifications on some things:
Each person can only enter once! Or as many times as they want... and they can place the blame on anybody they want for each entry. So yes, you can trade off qualifying pictures if you have enough people. HOWEVER, only your highest-scoring picture counts towards your OWN score.
I (or my associate or any of the judges, who decline to be revealed, so probably just I) need to be made aware of all entries, otherwise you can't get credit.
TLDR VERSION
Step 1: Draw an anthropomorphic endorphin. (or write about one. SHORT short story)
Step 2: Get at least one <some person> to do the same.
Step 3: Have that person get at least one more <another person> to do the same.
Step 4: You are now qualified and your base score is the sum of your entry plus 50% of the score of all children entries plus 25% of the score of all grandchild entries.
Step 5: Draw or write about SOMETHING that normally would or should never be anthropomorphized.
Step 6: Your base score is multiplied by the score of the second item.
Step 7: Get the best score.
Step 8: Win (Or lose. People have to do that too)
Step 9: ????
Step 10: PROFIT!!!
THE DEADLINE FOR THIS CONTEST IS MAY 31st 2008! Get to it!
(Being completely honest, I wouldn't put more than maybe ten minutes into it... But then again, my associate has been known in the past to go into the mall and empty a backpack load of $1000 worth of dollar bills off the second story onto the first story below, then watch the chaos ensue just for fun... so you never know.)
I'll let that bit of information help you to make a decision about the person who put me up to this.
The payment sounds bizarre enough to make me think that Katze put you up to it, but I don't think you two know each other?
I LOL'd at your bolded prizes that we WON'T be getting. =D
Although I think the contest is a little TOO weird and abstract for most people to show an interest, but who knows, I may be wrong.
i could so use any of that $
i am so poor... ok ill Enter.
My Entry.
My entry
I also enter hearing of this from Anailaigh whom heard it from Orca.
Anailaigh -> Confirmed, pending entry of second generation for qualification
|-- AurcoWolf -> Confirmed, no sub entrants
|-- Razok -> Confirmed, no sub entrants
|-- Orka -> Waiting on actual entry.
Remember: for Anailaigh to qualify, at least one of the people she got to enter have to get at least one other person to enter and accuse them of it.
He -DOES- point out that judging feedback is completely at your own risk because of two facts:
1: The judges are evil.
2: The feedback not only has little to do with the score, but also he points out that I he never told anybody exactly how the score is used to determine exactly who wins. It might be the highest score, or the lowest score, or the scores closest to pi. Doing better might get you a lower score, or a higher score, so that's kinda a secret also. It might be scored based on "the less they like it, the more points they give it, thus making the score wrong to win". Since this is all a secret, ahem, I quote:
"This is a blind contest and the judging criteria will not be released. Continue to enter at your own risk. Everyone has a good chance."
One of the people who entered because of you need to get somebody else to enter because of them for your part 1 to qualify so that you don't have no entry at all.
I have been referred by
So... tell me.. is this going anywhere?
So, now that Asalfred is qualified, he can move on to Part 2...
WTFDIJDA?
Now that you have warmed up by drawing something completely inane that you probably had to look up the definition of, then scratch your head and try to figure out how to anthropomorphize it, you can get on to the REAL fun part:
Pick something else either equally inane as an endorphin to anthropomorphize and create art about, or much more inane than that there endorphin. Something that normally would (or should) never be anthropomorphized. I'd give examples, but then people would cheat and steal them instead of coming up with ideas of their own so we'd have to block the use of anything that I gave as an example (You know, examples like FA itself, twisty straws, orgasms, PET scans, UPS, etc), so I won't give any (more) examples, since that would be unfair to people who had the great idea of the example before they found out that my stating it as an example caused it to become a disqualified idea.
Oh, yeah... That whole paragraph was to pick something. So... Um... Draw it. Or write about it. Then when you are done, you can proudly exclaim "WTFDIJDA?" (Or possibly "WTFDIJWAA?") and submit it as your multiplier entry.
my new job fucked me over so i forgot completely on this. -flails-
anyways, good luck.
ok hon. thanks
Anailaigh:
Please forward me PayPal information (Preferably) or Mailing Information for the receipt of your (I quote from the contest sponsor) "You didn't really win, but you lost less than everybody else." prize. You can note me.