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Birthday... and depression
13 years ago
Hello everyone,
so, today I got 24 years old. My family gave me a big plushie bear (not a teddy, but a real looking one), and in a month I will visit a nearby bear park.
I should be happy, I guess... yet I am not. I feel like a living dead. I don't feel like doing anything, neither drawing, playing the piano, nor browsing FA. I feel lonely and useless. Today it seems better, but tears weren't far yesterday. Don't know how this will go on.
At least I continued writing the rpg code. I have inserted synchronized statements at the appropriate places, and determined a reservation order to prevent deadlocks. Still, I wish I had defined a class diagram beforehand, because at the moment I fear that I'll lose the general view over my code.
Greetings from your semi-absent bear
skarute
so, today I got 24 years old. My family gave me a big plushie bear (not a teddy, but a real looking one), and in a month I will visit a nearby bear park.
I should be happy, I guess... yet I am not. I feel like a living dead. I don't feel like doing anything, neither drawing, playing the piano, nor browsing FA. I feel lonely and useless. Today it seems better, but tears weren't far yesterday. Don't know how this will go on.
At least I continued writing the rpg code. I have inserted synchronized statements at the appropriate places, and determined a reservation order to prevent deadlocks. Still, I wish I had defined a class diagram beforehand, because at the moment I fear that I'll lose the general view over my code.
Greetings from your semi-absent bear
skarute
i hope you enjoyed you birthday though :3 also, since i didnt know, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! :3
I am sorry you have to endure depression too, Blitz. I read your recent journal about how you're feeling, but couldn't find the proper words for a post.
"Fellow bear, I can relate to feeling blue. I use SecondLife as my therapy, and at least for a while I feel like I'm in control and command things at will."
"I've got a couple of decades on you and I still have days it's hard to feel motivated and engaged."
"When I was younger I used dark moods creatively if you can imagine it, withdrawing into my own 'not worlds' as I called them. MTI, or Mathue was created in those overcast moods. In fact a bevy of them were generated, Sir Silverton, Wildfire, Hammelton Rabbit and others came from fiction I wrote to fill those dour dispirited days and evenings."
"Funny as it may sound I miss those days when I created these characters."
"But anyway, feeling down while it's not often much fun, it will eventually break and brighter moods will appear."
"Congrats on the realistic bear plush, those are awesome to have, and I am envious of you seeing bears in the park in a month.
"Oh and Happy Birthday!"
I'm so sorry that you've been feeling so bad lately...You know that you can talk to me about anything...
Hö, I've begun to write a short story which might please us very well, I think... Have to finish it sometime.