Why do ducks use crosswalks? I hate this, I keep seeing it and I just want to stop and run up to the ducks yelling "you have wings motherfuckers!". They are the worst pedestrians too. They don't care about the line of cars, they want to take their sweet time walking on the crosswalk. Heck, I even saw one walk across, look at the line of ten cars, then walk back. That duck was a dick.
Now I'll be fair, I get why baby ducks and mother ducks use crosswalks. I mean they can't fly yet, and it's probably like some epic adventure for them or something, but I've seen too many grown ass ducks walking on crosswalks without any shame. That's just not okay.

Grow the fuck up ducks. You're not a little yellow fuzzball anymore. You're a grown ass duck with grown ass duck stuff to do, like hitting up visitors for bread or nibbling at grass and water plants. It's time to man up and let that childhood stuff go. Stop wasting time on the crosswalk and fly to do your duck stuff. The crosswalk is for baby ducks, and people if there's still room time after the baby ducks.