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List of things I learned working in the Meijer deli.
12 years ago
I may not be a smart cow...
1) If it is clean, it won't be that way for more than thirty seconds.
2) There is no such thing as "down time".
3) Start doing literally everything else with your left hand, lest you start looking like a chronic masturbator.
4) Pens do not write through grease.
5) The moment it's your turn to go on break, every customer in the area is automatically sent a memo that now is the only time to get deli meats and cheeses.
6) You are not human.
7) If you close one night and open the next morning, you may as well keep a cot in the break room. Sweet dreams.
8) Customers do not understand the phrase "I'll be with you in a moment".
9) Fat old white women will joust with each other over the last fried chicken breast.
10) There is no chance in hell of cooking a 50-piece order in under two hours.
2) There is no such thing as "down time".
3) Start doing literally everything else with your left hand, lest you start looking like a chronic masturbator.
4) Pens do not write through grease.
5) The moment it's your turn to go on break, every customer in the area is automatically sent a memo that now is the only time to get deli meats and cheeses.
6) You are not human.
7) If you close one night and open the next morning, you may as well keep a cot in the break room. Sweet dreams.
8) Customers do not understand the phrase "I'll be with you in a moment".
9) Fat old white women will joust with each other over the last fried chicken breast.
10) There is no chance in hell of cooking a 50-piece order in under two hours.
Half a dozen cell phone chargers
An ipod charger
1 and a half cell phones (one was a keypad, no screen)
$8 cash
$22 worth of winning scratch-off tickets
5 porno magazines
A fishing pole, rod, reel and all
7 unopened cans of beer
An entire 12-pack of diet coke
More sunglasses than I can count
And the list goes on.
Literally, throwing money away - wow!
Porn magazines and sunglasses do not surprise me.
Fishing pole seams a bit odd unless it was broken.
Yet, unopened beer and the diet coke boggles my mind on why throw away good unopened cans. O-o
Hummm, if the pole is in good shape I would go fishing with it. Mmmmmm catfish. ^^
Yea, all right I can see the reasoning for the beer if it was a Spring Break thing.
#7 is very true according to my fiancee when he worked at McDonalds years ago although he slept in his truck
#9 I ROFL so hard since it is not the African American stereotype. I had the funniest image in my head of a joust with 2 drumsticks in my mind.