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As you've probably noticed
12 years ago
“And it is still true, no matter how old you are -- when you go out into the world, it is best to hold hands and stick together.”
I worked out how to attach my mobile phone to my laptop and get internet connection here in scotland although its dreadfully slow.
Its been sad and good here at the same time. My dad is surprisingly more agile than I expected Which is pretty cool, And it was actually sunny for a chunk of today which was unexpected.
I took my laptop and tablet in order to do some commissions whilst im up here but various family members have been staring over my shoulder at points during my time here so its been difficult to work on many commissions, although Im proud to say ive done the background of the huge group pic and its looking awesome already im in feeling really proud of it and thats without the characters LOL.
But at the same time it made me emmensly sad, you see My mum and dad looked at my art and they were utterly astounded that i could produce art of that quality. They were genuinely shocked, which made me feel good but equally made me feel super sad, the tone in their voice seemed to suggest that they thought it was actually beyond my capabilities and they were captivated whilst I let them watch me draw two pics of my nephew and neice. Ive always tried to make my parents proud of me. its one of the primary factors that fuelled me as a child...actually..no thats a lie...it was THE primary factor. I just wanted to here my dad say he was proud of me. Ive only heard him say that to me once, and that was when I got married, which in the great scheme of things didnt really involve me trying my best or anything...It kinda confused me that he said it to me then, rather than all the other things ive done in my life. But yeah tonight he seemed utterly shocked that I could draw and I wanted to grin and cry at the same time. Perhaps if they had encouraged me all those years ago rather than laugh at me things might have been different. Still no point lamenting the past.
Oh dear god im glad my dad just went to bed...watching sky most shocking and two dudes just went into a mall wearing only diapers and singing on a guitar just to shock people. I think I would have just cringed and died had my dad still be sitting here. He knows im an AB and its always uncomfy when nappy adverts and stuff like that come on tv when im in the room, but that would have been just too much to bear LOL *blushing lots*
Anyway im in a happy and sad which is a really confusing place to be LOL, no that im downstairs alone i can actually do some proper commission work HUZZAH.
Its been sad and good here at the same time. My dad is surprisingly more agile than I expected Which is pretty cool, And it was actually sunny for a chunk of today which was unexpected.
I took my laptop and tablet in order to do some commissions whilst im up here but various family members have been staring over my shoulder at points during my time here so its been difficult to work on many commissions, although Im proud to say ive done the background of the huge group pic and its looking awesome already im in feeling really proud of it and thats without the characters LOL.
But at the same time it made me emmensly sad, you see My mum and dad looked at my art and they were utterly astounded that i could produce art of that quality. They were genuinely shocked, which made me feel good but equally made me feel super sad, the tone in their voice seemed to suggest that they thought it was actually beyond my capabilities and they were captivated whilst I let them watch me draw two pics of my nephew and neice. Ive always tried to make my parents proud of me. its one of the primary factors that fuelled me as a child...actually..no thats a lie...it was THE primary factor. I just wanted to here my dad say he was proud of me. Ive only heard him say that to me once, and that was when I got married, which in the great scheme of things didnt really involve me trying my best or anything...It kinda confused me that he said it to me then, rather than all the other things ive done in my life. But yeah tonight he seemed utterly shocked that I could draw and I wanted to grin and cry at the same time. Perhaps if they had encouraged me all those years ago rather than laugh at me things might have been different. Still no point lamenting the past.
Oh dear god im glad my dad just went to bed...watching sky most shocking and two dudes just went into a mall wearing only diapers and singing on a guitar just to shock people. I think I would have just cringed and died had my dad still be sitting here. He knows im an AB and its always uncomfy when nappy adverts and stuff like that come on tv when im in the room, but that would have been just too much to bear LOL *blushing lots*
Anyway im in a happy and sad which is a really confusing place to be LOL, no that im downstairs alone i can actually do some proper commission work HUZZAH.
As for your art, have they really never seen you draw before? *surprised*
I guess it all depend how your parents hade be raise, my father never realy share any feeling with me, other then humour or if she was angry about something i do, i never rember him saying to me he was proud of me, but i know he do, he just never learn how to express thos feeling.
I've told many fellow Deviants that they should not car what their parents feel about their work, but obviously this is a big thing for you.
I hope this visit for you doesn't go too badly for you, Sammy. Please don't be too sad about everything (especially your nephew's passing).