I have this amazing chinese food place that I go to at least once a week, and I usually grab like 3-5 fortune cookies on my way out. I remember I used to get things like "You will have success in business" or something like that. Now I get really specific ones that are just plain wrong and weird. ._. Here's a few of them along with my initial reactions to them: (I swear I'm not making these up!)

1. "We get along well. :)"
Wtf you're a cookie! Who is this "WE?" The fortune cookie company? The cookie!? Well I don't think we get along that well since I just ate you and you tasted stale. <_<

2. "It's sunny today. :)"
*looks outside* It's raining and thundering you dumb fuck. =.=

3. "You will have a party. :)"
With WHO? All of my good friends live like 45 minutes away. Have your own damn party.

4. "A rolling stone collects no moss. :)"
Okay...? That's not really a fortune. ._.


Fortune cookies, I am disappoint. :/

Anyone else get weird fortunes? Please post them below! I'd love to hear some more! :)
Also, should I keep hanging onto the weird ones and do this again for a later journal?