I know I may be silent at times but I'm not gone, I'm right where I always was/am, I know I may not start conversations often [if at all] but that's not because I don't consider any of you as a friend, I'm not being distant, I'm not abandoning you, I'm not disinterested in you.

If I haven't talked to you in a while please just send me a message, strike up a conversation, do whatever, please.

I have issues because of my past, I struggle with self-worth, self-image, self-hate, depression, ADHD/ADD, ODD, and a broad myriad of miscellaneous other quirks and kinks that make me rather anti-social by nature. It's not that I do not want to talk to any of you, I do, I want to be sociable and likable, I just struggle to find myself 'worthy' of potentially bothering you, I'm always terrified that I'll try to spark up a conversation and just end up being an annoyance. That can probably be chalked up to my mother's rigid enforcement of the "should be seen and not heard" adage. It doesn't help either that my sleep schedule is all kinds of fucked up [wake up around 5-6pm my time, sleep 9-10am my time] and that I have recently gotten hooked on GW2.

If I have ever made you feel like I'm not interested, or that I'm distant, or that I'm 'drifting away' or whatever I sincerely apologize, it's not true, I cherish every single one of you amazing individuals that I am blessed enough to call friends.

Thank you for your time.

My birthday was yesterday and every single "Happy Birthday" warmed my heart, I know that may sound superficial but I am in a legitimate rough spot at the moment and it really really really helped me out, sincerely, thank you.~

Taken from  Somi

Take the BDSM test to see where you fall on the board.~

88% Switch
76% Experimentalist
66% Bondage Giver
63% Voyeur
61% Bondage Receiver
61% Daddy/Mommy
61% Submissive
59% Masochist
58% Primal (Predator)
54% Dominant
54% Primal (Prey)
53% Degradation Giver
53% Degradation Receiver
50% Brat
50% Non-monogamist
50% Sadist
48% Pervert
46% Brat Tamer
46% Master/Mistress
45% Vanilla
43% Girl/Boy
42% All-Rounder
41% Exhibitionist
30% Slave

I knew I was a switch anyways but to see it so clearly is rather nice.

Test is here: https://bdsmtest.org/

If you completed a picture for me or anything like that please let me know here, I have 4121 submissions to go through and that will be quite a chore.

Okay, so, if you play TERA you may be aware that it's Christmas time right now and with that comes the Wintera Golden Gift boxes and the rarer Santa Suit which can be quite expensive, the Elin version in particular is going for 60k gold on my servers alone.

I have the smart box so whatever character/race opens it will get their costume.

I want to sell it, I'm looking for either 15$ or the equivalent in art, if you know someone that's super into TERA and wants the costume either let me know or tell them about me, thanks. I will be losing internet sometime tomorrow or the day after and do not expect to be able to have internet again for a few weeks time, please do not be discouraged if I do not reply to an offer while I'm away.

Again, as well:

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/15305954/

Any and all characters found within that link are open for sale, if you want something and have 5-15$ to spare do not hesitate to approach me, you can get a LOT for that money right now.

An ex-friend, just weeks before telling you, to your face, that you aren't friends anymore and they don't want to talk to you any further, even by association, now approaching to try and give you a pity gift because no one else did.

Have you ever had that happen? This ex-friend of mine was someone I considered very close, we didn't talk much recently, I drifted away and they started hanging out with someone I despised, my other ex-friend that dumped me and then harassed me to the point of tears. We didn't see eye to eye anymore I suppose and they subsequently broke off our friendship, not even talking to me as an acquaintance, just brushing me aside and openly welcoming my harasser as a new best friend, it's safe to say I was fucking pissed. To add further insult to injury they just approached me as if we were still buddies despite tossing me away just as my other ex-friend had done and offered to buy me Isaac Rebirth, I assume as pity because no one else in my friends even considered or approached me about getting me a gift.

I turned them down, reminded them that we aren't friends, and asked them to remove me from their Steam friends as they had removed me on all other services, apparently this makes me rude to some degree and they were rather agitated by this. WHAT THE FUCK IS THEIR PROBLEM?!

WE WERE FRIENDS LONGER THAN ANYONE ELSE AND THEY TOSSED ME LIKE DIRTY LAUNDRY! Is it wrong to be mad at them? Is it wrong to be insulted by this fucking forced pity shit attempt at a gift? This fucking person, let me tell you about our friendship further so you can understand why I'm so outraged at this moment and why I'm writing a fucking rant journal about it! We were close buds, pals, I showed them my face IRL, I told them about my issues, I consoled in them, and offered up my shoulder if they ever needed it, I also helped pay for their art when they wanted a picture with their at the time significant other, that last one really stings as the reason I wasn't in the picture is because I disliked their significant other. I paid for art that had them and someone I hated because I wanted them to be happy more than myself.

That's the kind of person I am, I didn't lord it over them either, I wanted them to be happy and I did what I could, I also introduced them to the artist that does their character art now, amazing pictures, really capture the character's essence. But that's a different matter, anyways, they eventually broke up, drama happened, I no longer felt comfortable in my main hang out joint because of my harassing ex-friend, hopped around on alts, yadda yadda, time skip a few months or whatever and there we go. We didn't lose contact entirely, but we didn't talk nearly as much, I start coming back to main hang-out after getting homesick, I get a very very luke-warm reception, feel unappreciated, and leave once again, a few months more pass and I finally return properly to be greeted by my 'friend' telling me we're no longer even acquaintances, they've replaced me with my harasser that essentially made it impossible to enjoy stopping by. Do you know how that made me feel? Fucking awful, November and December are some of my worst months of a year when it comes to depression, even considered biting the bullet this year but I have things to live for, again, not here for that topic.

They don't say shit to me for ages, pretty much ignore me, continued warm fuzzy greetings for that asshole, pretty much made it very clear I wasn't wanted.

Fast forward to this very night, I mention my lack of gifts, ping comes the private message, and now, here I am, furious, ranting to the internet about a lost friendship and the insult of a pity gift, am I wrong? Should I not ve upset about this? Should I not want to rant?

Why do I feel like the badguy?

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6344341/ By this guy, you should enter, it'll be fun.

So I have this character, Boanoelle, she's an Elin from the f2p mmo TERA, she's young looking and she has a big monster-y penis, I assume you can see where this is going.

I'm basically looking for an artist that doesn't mind loli-esque characters, doesn't mind 'weir' dicks, and will do a full body image for around $20, would prefer color or a simple shading on lineart-type dealio but I'm not going to be picky about that sort of shit.

Here is the characters:

https://www.dropbox.com/sh/ax6bduwp.....Op9NZSJea?dl=0

The, uh, 'realistic' looking images there are just to have an updated view on how the spines along the bottom should look and the ridges and stuff like that, her simple crotch sketchy picture is much better for the sheath/color look to it.

So yeah, let me know of any recommendations on tumblr, deviantart, furaffinity, whatever else honestly, if I like their style and prices I'll have a look at them.

It was first mentioned that disabling your notes/comments may be able to keep you safe for some reason, however it should be mentioned that Zido has had access to confidential information for a year since he has been a hidden admin for that long, chances are if he cared to steal your information he'd have done so already.

Unquestionably this is the single stupidest choice I have ever seen made by FA staff, sincerely, how in the fuck do you run a website and think to yourself: "Oh hey, my neighbor is a well known hacker, is hated by a majority of communities, and has personally damaged and sabotaged other furry associated sites... I should hire him as a coder."

I'm not calling Dragoneer a retard, but he's a fucking moron.

Now, for the main point of this though, as I said, he's already had access and he could easily set it up to have the servers redirect any deleted notes to him personally, same with disabled notes and their archives, if it has already been sent on FA in either a note or a comment or whatever, he's had access to it. Disabling your notes and comments will only make it more difficult for your fanbase/customers to contact you easily, that is all that is happening by doing that, instead change whatever personal information you've shared and do not share any of it in the future, there's no reason they can't take a personal copy of the server information for themselves.

Personally I hope Zidonuke is removed, he's toxic, harmful, and a vast majority of users do not like or feel comfortable with him in a position of power, for once I hope the FA staff will do the right thing, they fuck up and ruin whatever it is they touch and giving them an iota of trust is a fucking big mistake.

Have your back-up plans ready, when Zido is around you can bet there will be chaos, confusion, and damage out the ass.

Fuck you Zido, fuck you Dragoneer, get a brain.

The whole damn timeline makes 0 sense whatsoever because of how the story is now played out:

- Freddy's falls into disarray after some children are killed at a previous location.
- Pizzeria moves into a new location and with it spends a small fortune on improved animatronics.
- Management upgrades the previous animatronics as well just in case.
- New location is hit with more controversy as the Golden Freddy costume is used, this event leads to the "Bite of 87".
- New location closes and the pizzeria moves back into the old location.
- During the moving event the new animatronics are destroyed and the previous ones get a downgrade before being repaired.
- The events of Five Nights at Freddy's 1 unfold.

Do you see the major issue here? The corporation, who is known for being cheap and stingy, spent a small fortune to create entirely better versions of the old animatronics and then summarily destroyed them in favor of downgrading and then fixing up the old and rotten and abused animatronics.

In what world do you spend money on something that is 100% better only to toss it out entirely for something worse?

It's illogical and the way the game plays out in the beginning is 100% straightforward sequel, it's only on the 6th night that the whole 'prequel' thing is made clear or even mentioned, it honestly feels like during development the whole game was a sequel until at the very end the maker was just like: "Yeah, nah, prequel." It's dumb, it's illogical, and it makes no sense, it cheapens the experience and the story, what's worse is that the game has great backstory told through the minigames and it's just wasted.

Further, it creates and then summarily abandons 2 new characters, the Puppet and Balloon Boy, who will not appear in the inevitable sequel since they have been 100% removed from the Pizzeria by the time FN@F1 happens, which is itself like a decade after FN@F2.

It's a shame, the guy can make a decent enough game but his story-writing skills are really subpar.

You ever approach an artist about a custom and they seem interested and friendly and they tell you "Sure thing as soon as I'm done." but that never comes? You wait and you wait and time passes and nothing comes up about it, no messages, no updates, no nothing, and then after you've given up hope you see something from the artist that screams back to that thing you talked with them about? For someone else?

Yeah, I just had that happen to me.

Don't know what I did wrong, I thought I was nice enough about everything, very polite and understanding, and yet when I see it it's just... it's how I imagined my thing would be, same theme, same sort of shape, only difference being the gender which as it was anyways wouldn't have been a very defining feature...

I wish people would just be honest.

I'll be using colors rather than names since I am bad with names.

Let's start by breaking down the sequence of events:

The group visits a haunted cave to explore and look around, Blue heads down a lower path while Orange and Purple head on a higher one, both paths come to the same main chamber/pit, Orange is seemingly possessed by a green taint and pushes Purple to his death in front of Blue. The sets off a chain reaction in which Purple is resurrected as a ghost, Blue is both overcome with grief and apparently has her memories tied into the locket/heart, Orange is likewise hysteric and distraught at what he's done, and Red tears off Orange's arm to remove the taint.

The group reunites sometime later at a haunted house, the energy that stops the van is purple which means that it was the ghost of Purple drawing them there, the group explores the house and comes under attack from purple apparitions before they are dropped down a pitfall. As they fall they encounter three mirrors that reflect very important details, Blue has empty eyes, Orange is missing an arm but is otherwise unchanged, and Red's mirror cracks as not to show his 'true' form, upon landing Orange is greeted by a tall black coffin with glowing purple decorations. From the coffins steps out the ghost of Purple, the ghost seemingly exclaims that it was Orange he hated ["Fuck, it's you I hated the most."] which results in a terrified Orange fleeing for his life from the vengeful phantom, the group reunites in full during the chase sequence before Red stops to examine a painting which reflects the previous events. It is important to note the images around the painting which are of thorns/tangles and several images of a heart, the first being surrounded by swirling masses, the next being a heart that is 'tangled', and the final image being a broken heart.

Orange becomes cornered and an angered Purple rushes towards him before Blue steps in between them to shield Orange, Purple is visibly saddened by seeing Blue and extends the heart towards her, a seemingly 'not understanding' Blue attempts to hold the heart in her hands. Orange however pulls her away before she can and the heart drops to the ground, losing it's golden coloration and cracking, an enraged Purple unleashes his fury while Orange, Blue, and Red flee the mansion, hopping in their vehicle to drive away as the skeletonized spirit of Purple opens the heart to reveal an image of him and Blue, with a single tear he fades away.

Now, for the theories:

The Purple we see is his ghost consumed with hatred and revenge - He wants to kill Orange for killing him and his form reflects this, he is a skeleton much like death is usually represented, he is 'fueled' by Blue's memories of him which are trapped in the locket, this is why she doesn't remember him. It is only when his fury has been expelled that he opens the locket and remembers for himself, his spirit no longer consumed by vengeance returns to it's true form, he lets a single tear go as he remembers his love for Blue and finally departs, no longer holding the grudge.

He was bound by memories and with Blue not having those memories any further Purple has nothing left to stay for, there i nothing keeping him here any further, and as the song suggests he really does disappear.

Blue still loves Purple - Upon entering the house they are greeted by purple flames and spirits, Blue is visibly happy at the sight of these things while Red and Orange are different, Red seems cautious and Orange seems terrified, possibly because he remembers. This opening scene and in the flashback/locket are the only times she seems to smile in full, the van smiles are seemingly ones of just enjoying herself but she's legitimately overjoyed in the previously mentioned scenes, perhaps she remembered Purple?

Further, the lenses of her glasses are Purple, it is my theory that she only has eyes for purple, even now, she only loves him.

Orange replaced Purple after his death - Orange is seen driving the van, further, him and Blue smile at each other now, before when purple was around he seemed to keep his gaze on Purple and Blue until they smiled at each other, I don't know if this is him replacing Purple entirely but he has taken on those duties himself.

Though he hasn't made a move on Blue yet, whether it's because of his guilt or something else I don't know, but she most definitely doesn't seem to look at Orange with romantic interest or intent.

Further, I'll elaborate my feelings on different theories:

Orange was consumed by Jealousy - Plausible, we see in the animation that he turns his head away when Purple and Blue are smiling at each other, however when we see Orange's expression after pushing Purple there is no smile on his face, he is horrified at what he had done while the possessed half is gleeful.

I do not believe that Orange pushed him of his own accord, he was jealous of their relationship or had eyes on Blue himself, either way the possession played on those emotions to get in before killing Purple, it pushed him to do it, he did not plan on killing his friend.

Whether or not he knew what he was doing I sincerely doubt he did, his expression upon realizing what he had done is one of terror, not happiness that an obstacle is now removed.

Red wiped the memories of Orange and Blue - Plausible again but on rewatching the video several times to write this I have come to a different conclusion, if he did wipe any memories it was from Orange, Blue's memories were taken and trapped in the locket/heart when she witnessed Purple's death.

Further Orange is terrified and fearful of Purple, whether it's because he's a ghost with a skull head or because he recognizes Purple I don't know, there isn't much evidence on whether or not he's forgotten Purple, though it should be mentioned that his distraught eyes are very similar to the terrified eyes he has when Purple dons his hair.

Plus when it cuts back and forth between Orange and Purple before he gets eyes there seems to be looking of dawning horror on Oranges face, as if he's realizing just who this ghost is.

What do you guys think? Any theories or your own to share? Discussion? I look forward to seeing what everyone thinks.

Here's a link to the video in case anyone hasn't watched it yet:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YlEb3L1PIco

For as long as I can remember, whenever I get full I have a bout of sneezing, not little sneezes either but like powerful head shaking ears ringing eyes watering sneezes, sometimes it takes a little time to trigger and sometimes I feel like I'll bust out sneezing even as I'm chewing on some food.

This is a genetic disorder known as Snatiation, it's a wiring issue in the brain very similar to the Photic Sneeze Reflex in where a person will see a bright light and sneeze because of it, according to estimates between 10-35% of the human population suffers from Photic Sneeze Reflex and even less than that will also have Snatiation. It is an autosomal dominant inheritance trait which means that it is passed on from a single parent, I don't know if it's my dad or my mom that passed it on to me since I can't recall it being in any of my relatives, it's odd but I really have no clue which side of the family it came from so as far as I know I'm the only one with it. As a bonus I also have Photic Sneeze Reflex but it only comes when the light is particularly bright and focused, just seeing the sun doesn't make me sneeze, as a bonus though my eyes water quite heavily during a sneeze attack, whether that's because of the sneezes or more crossed wires is yet to be seen.

Additionally, since it's a genetic thing there is a chance that any children I have will also inherit the disorder, it's kind of strange like that, on one hand I'm happy to know conclusively that I'm not alone with this thing since I never seen anyone else, but on the other it's also kind of a curse, no one finds hard explosive sneezes to be cute.

For anyone curious, some people get 20-30 sneezes in a fit while I, at most, only get around 15, usually closer to 6-8 for an average full meal.

What about you guys? Any strange or weird or rare things about you?

It plays and looks like RE4 except with more gore and a lot less plot, I really don't think it's the survival horror 'return to form' as people were calling it before release, to be painfully honest... I didn't like it, the disjointed plot and settings may be for a 'reason' but it still detracts from the experience and ultimately I think that's where it fails. It kind of feels like someone took the psychological elements of Silent Hill with the visuals of Resident Evil 4 and the gore of the Saw franchise and a tiny dash of Assassin's Creed science.

Don't think any of that is a spoiler, the game has as much subtlety as any ham fisted horror movie.

It doesn't try to scare you so much as disturb you but it lays it on so thick that you just become desensitized to it, maybe that's a hidden brilliance to it or something but it just leaves the remainder feeling kind of bland.

If you really want to play it, take my advice, rent it, borrow it from a friend, or just wait for it to go on sale, if you have no interest in the game but want to know the story... well good luck, you don't even fully understand the story when you play the game from beginning to end, but don't worry... there's DLC to explain it all, isn't that great? /sarcasm

So yeah, uh, kind of good gore at the beginning, not so much after you're 4 hours into the damn thing.

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6180522/

It's a raffle to either get a solo picture of your character or of your character and his doing something fun, give it a look, enter if you're interested.~

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6182461/

They're in a bad situation and are looking for anyone in their area that might have a place for them to stay, please, if you have a spare room or you know someone that does or if you might be able to help at all, have a look.

Thank you for your time.

Moolah, the green cheese, fat stacks of paperbacks, bundles of benjamins, paper happiness, chunks of cha-ching, GREED IN THE FLESH.

You know what I'm talkin about, that sweet little numerical value that allows us to trade arbitrary amounts of paper in exchange for goods, or sometimes not even paper when you're using digital transactions or e-currency, essentially a worthless item given importance because someone somewhere said so.

Now, the point of this journal is to say my piece on money and why I'm so sick and tired of people begging for cash, not people that are fundraising for a cause (even I don't personally rally for said cause), but people that have shit like Dreamies and Eerays that a month later are in desperate need for money. Shit happens, we all know that so unexpected financial binds are perfectly fine, who hasn't spent a large sum of money on something they enjoyed only to have a relative die in a horrendous car crash the next month so they suddenly really need that money back to pay for the funeral, am I right? We've all been there before, that's fine and dandy, I don't see an issue with that since life just chucked you a shitty lemon when you were expecting a hairless peach, bad things happen to everyone.

No, this is for people that spend that money on something trivial when they know full well they'll need the money for something else soon enough and spend the money anyways, the kind of person that just expects a couple hundred bucks to be dumped in their lap in one night. The kind of person that has a couple high-end adoptable designs and is mysteriously in a money bind the next month, the kind of bind where they need a handful of smackaroos in a single night or else they're fucked, the kind of person that knows full well that they'll be needing the money but just doesn't save for it.

If you are the kind of person to do that I just frankly don't feel like I can respect you, plan ahead, be smart with your money, don't get pissy when people don't blow their monetary wads all over your face whenever you need it, it's all pretty simple shit and yet there are countless people that can't do it.

It's just disgusting to see that behavior, I like a lot of people, I'm a really nice person, but that is not something I can stomach.

RULES :
1. Pick one of your OCs. (I picked two, deal with it)
2. Fill in the questions/statements as if you were your OC.
3. Tag four people to do this meme! [Nah]
4. Tell people that they been tagged with a link from your journal [Nah]

OC Picked: Noelle 'Naifu' Larouche

1. What is your name?
Naifu

2. Do you know why you were named that?
Because I like to stab people probably, though I kind of wish my nickname was 'staker' or something cool like that.

3. Single or taken?
Single, don't really have any love-life as it is, yet.

4. Have any abilities or powers?
Does stabbing count as a super power? I guess I have, like, really quick reflexes, like a mongoose, does that work?

5. Stop being a Mary Sue!
Really funny.

6. What's your eye color?
Golden yellowish sort of.

7. How about hair color?
Oh, red, I love my nice rich red hair, looks really cool fluttering in the wind and stuff.

8. Have you any family members?
Nope, mom and dad died a few years ago in a car crash, I don't have any extended family either or siblings.

9. Oh? How about pets?
I have a pigeon that stays at my loft, I have a perch and feed set out on the balcony for him, I call him Tim.

10. That's cool, I guess. Now tell me something you don't like.
Don't like? Uh, getting shot is probably the thing I don't like the most, hurts like a bitch.

11. Do you have any activities/hobbies that you like to do?
I like to collect fossils and stamps, I also tend to a neat little moss garden, it's pretty fun.

12. Have you ever hurt anyone in any way before?
Is this a serious question? Yes, of course.

13. Ever… killed anyone before?
Yeah, like, a bunch of guys, at least 20.

14. What kind of animal are you?
Uh, like spirit animal? I'd probably say the common Pigeon, I really enjoy their looks and personalities, they get a lot of shit as 'flying rats' but they're very clean and very strong animals.

15. Name your worst habits.
I chew my nails.

16. Do you look up to anyone at all?
Not really, I mean, I have some people in the corps that I train with but nothing like admiration.

17. Are you gay, straight, or bisexual?
I don't really know, I mean, I like girls and feminine things, so, bi-sexual with a female preference? Does that work?

18. Do you go to school?
I take courses online in my spare time, keeps me sharp.

19. Ever want to marry and have kids one day?
I'd like to someday, maybe once I'm out of the business and I've settled down, sure.

20. Do you have fangirls/fanboys?
Not that I know of, there's probably some people out there that like me.

21. What are you most afraid of?
Dying alone, grim, I know, but there's just something that frightens me about getting wounded and not making it back home, who would feed my bird? Water my plants? It's worrisome.

22. What do you usually wear?
I like to keep it light and breezy, thin shirts, baggy pants, boots, that sort of stuff, though I will dress up for fancy things.

23. What's one food that tempts you?
Most cakes, uhm, ribs, ginger beef, spring rolls, fried foods really get my goat.

24. Am I annoying you?
Not really, but some of these questions are dumb, or just not questions at all.

25. Well, it's still not over!
Okay...

26. What class are you (low class, middle class, high class)?
Uh, attitude I'm low class, but actual income... higher end of middle class.

27. How many friends do you have?
Oh, uhm, I'd say I have... 16-17 friends? All from the corps.

28. What are your thoughts on pie?
I don't like fruit pies, backed fruit disgusts me, but I love me some pecan pie.

30. Favorite drink?
Iced tea, it's smooth and easy to drink.

31. What's your favorite place?
My bedroom.

32. Are you interested in anyone~?
My current target is kind of cute, shame I have to kill her.

33. That was a stupid question.
Alright.

34. Would you rather swim in a lake or the ocean?
Lake, the ocean is more stimulating but I prefer to see the bottom, plus lake critters are far less dangerous than ocean ones.

35. What's your type?
Type? I don't know.

36. Any fetishes?
Blood play, BDSM, pet play, anal is pretty sweet, impregnation is high up there too.

37. Seme or uke?
Uh, seme.

38. Camping or indoors?
I like camping from time to time, but a nice cushy bed is hard to pass up.

Are you afraid of:

[x] the dark
[x] staying single forever
[ ] being a parent
[ ] giving birth
[ ] being myself in front of others
[x] open spaces
[ ] closed spaces
[x] heights
[ ] dogs
[ ] birds
[ ] fish
[x] spiders
[ ] flowers or other plants
Total so far: 5

[x] being touched
[ ] fire
[x] deep water
[ ] snakes
[ ] silk
[x] failure
[ ] success
[ ] thunder/lightning
[ ] frogs/toads
[ ] girlfriends/boyfriend's dad
[ ] girlfriends/boyfriend's mom
[ ] rats
[x] jumping from high places
[ ] snow
Total so far: 9

[ ] rain
[ ] wind
[x] crossing hanging bridges
[ ] death
[x] heaven
[ ] being robbed
[x] falling
[ ] clowns
[ ] dolls
[x] large crowds of people
[ ] men
[ ] women
[x] having great responsibilities
[ ] doctors, including dentists
[ ] tornadoes
Total so far: 14

[ ] hurricanes
[x] incurable diseases
[ ] sharks
[ ] Friday the 13th
[ ] ghosts
[x] poverty
[ ] Halloween
[x] school
[ ] trains
[ ] odd numbers
[ ] even numbers
[x] becoming blind
[ ] becoming deaf
[ ] growing up
Total so far: 18

[x] creepy noises in the night
[ ] bee stings
[ ] not accomplishing my dreams/goals
[ ] blood
[ ] dinosaurs
[ ] the welcome mat
[x] high speed
[ ] throwing up
[x] falling in love
[ ] super secrets
Total: 21

If you wish to post this journal, it's been requested that you title it, "I'm afraid of __ out of 72 fears"

if you get more than 30, I highly suggest counseling
if you get more than 20, you're paranoid
if you get 10-20, you're normal.
if you get under 10, you're fearless.

There's a lot of fears this doesn't include so I'll go ahead and toss them in at the end as a bonus for anyone that cares:

[x] needles
[x] alone at night
[x] being defenseless
[x] being followed
[x] can't move
[x] getting trapped
[x] nurses
[x] puppets
[x] being recorded
[x] the unknown
[x] being a victim
Total: 32

Finally any clarification on answers that I felt need it:

[x] spiders - Only the thin/small/spindly ones, I like Tarantulas, hate most other spiders.
[x] heaven - If heaven exists, as in a religious after-life, it probably means I'm going to hell, if there is a hell at least.

Don't you just love it? That's 100% fucking sarcasm, I like roleplaying on a little site called f-list and that's not really a surprise or at least it shouldn't be but I have a very simple system for my characters, ones I own/want people to know about I keep in my character list, everything else is stuff I just want to fuck around with without being linked to myself. You know, anonymous fun times because it's great to just get away for a while and not get pestered by people you know but don't want hopping on your ass.

At least that's how it would work if I WASN'T BEING FUCKING HARASSED, I keep getting hounded by a user I want nothing to do with, we were good friends, really close so they know my personal stuff, until they dumped me like a bag of trash without a single fucking word. So I put them on block/ignore as I didn't want anything to do with them, they know I don't want to be associated with them in the slightest and yet they keep spoiling who my characters are, they can recognize who I am because of my style of bolding profile text and because I'm like the only person ignoring them. It takes them 5 seconds to recognize me because of this and they keep spoiling who my alts are publically, even though it's against the rules and they know it, even though I don't want them saying anything about me and they know that too.

I've been more than nice about the whole thing, never reported them for it because I assumed they would eventually grow tired of ruining my fun and spoiling it, but no, today was the last damn stray when they not only said who my alt was but even said my IRL name and gender publicly.

So now I've reported them and here's hoping they get the fucking picture this time.

Anyone else have a similar experience like this, at all? I'm venting right now because of how absolutely livid I am, my hands are legit shaking because of how angry and upset I am that they would go that fucking far when they know they're not allowed to, you're not even supposed to talk about a person that has you blocked regardless so yeah, big breach of privacy.

To any of you in a similar situation, don't be nice, report them, report them right fucking then and there, some people don't know when to just leave you the fuck alone.

If the person is reading this: I want you to know that I'm crying right now, I hope you're happy you fuck, you broke my heart when you dumped me and you've done nothing but hurt me and abuse my forgiveness ever since.

I'm sorry but if I see another very generic design being called a closed species I will lose my mind, adding gemstones to a shark does not make it a super original species, adding a magic piece of clothing doesn't cut it either, if your closed species can be described as "Oh, it's an X that has a Y." you need to go back to the drawing board.

If you want to claim something as unique to you at least do it with something that is actually unique, does it have a unique piece of anatomy that differentiates it from others? Great, good job, now do that for the rest of it too so it's no longer an X and is something uniquely you. I may not like Dreamies but they at least don't just look like an average run of the mill anthro with some bullshit item or gems slapped on it, a Dreamy looks like a Dreamy and not like a cat or a dog or a fox or an elk or a whatever, they're humanoids with frilly ears, other frilly/fluffy elements, and that identifying pom-pom tail. Heck even look at Eerays, an Eeray is how a unique closed anthro species design should be done, they have a humanoid build with distinct elements, namely the large tails and 'wings' that flow together seamlessly, the extra long tail having 2 additional fins at the base of it and a longer one adorning the end of the tail. Or hell, even look at something like my own Kaeroki, what is a Kaeroki in basic terms? An amphibian anthro, but it's more than that and it shows on their features and biology, they poses fairly unique pointed ear/nubs lined with a frill of gill-like structures, they have 2 large singing cheeks that inflate and deflate as they sing, and they have paddle shaped tadpole tails.

Are those features unique to those species alone? Not at all, you can easily come up with a pom-pom tail or manta ray wings or cheek pouches, it's how those features are used together to make a whole that is unique from the rest visually. As a further comparison look at Manta Charks and Eerays, they both have those manta ray wings but they are unique and different from one another, an anthro Manta Chark will not look like Eeray and vice versa, that's not because of their backstory but because of the sum total of their parts. Compare the wings directly and they're very similar, compare the rest of them too and they're pretty clearly different, can you really say the same for some of these other ones that get made every day? I know I sure as hell can't when the most distinguishing feature is "extra fluff" and some gemstone/clothing/item.

Not everyone needs a closed species, if your species is a generic anthro with a piece of clothing to serve as the unique trait you don't need to close it, there's not much quality control needed for cats and dogs with magical gemstone sweatervests.

Never start work on a commission until you have been paid, in one way or another, that way you can't get fucked by an asshole that has no plans on paying you for the work you're going to be doing. The only reasonable alternative is the half-now half-later thing, aka you get them to pay half of the commission, you draw up a sketch or whatever to make sure they're satisfied and then they pay you the rest before you complete the image.

Same goes for any physical goods, the person should pay you before you send the goods, if it's an artist wanting to pay for something with art you make them complete the image first, or at least get to linework, then send the goods.

This is to protect the people most at risk, if I buy art and the artist doesn't deliver I can make a simple chargeback on paypal to get my refund by force, can't do that with physical goods or time/effort.

The person with the money is the one at least risk in a digital transaction.

Yeah, he died, apparently from some form of asphyxia suicide, so it could be he hung himself improperly or he was doing something very naughty and the police reports are painting it in the most positive light you can when a beloved comedian has killed himself.

I'll miss his brand of humor for sure, as well as his fantastic acting when it came to more serious/emotional roles, I particularly enjoyed his performance in What Dreams May Come.

We shouldn't focus on the loss of the man or how he was taken from us too soon, but more on what he meant to us, what we loved about his movies and his performances, what will really stick with us many many months to come once the news of his death is no longer shocking.

I'm finally back, got my little usb wireless thingamajigger and now everything is all hunky dory, even applied for a job that I should have an easy in to, things are going pretty well so far :D

My laptop's internal wireless has died, technically it died the night before today while I was in one of Diehasen's stream for personal art, still pretty miffed I didn't get to watch the whole thing.

Regardless I ordered a USB wireless thingy off of Amazon, it said free 2-day shipping but the estimate said it wouldn't be delivered until the 11th, so yeah, for anyone wondering where I am that's it.

I'm only on right now because I hijacked a friend's computer to download some youtube videos for entertainment and they're out of the room at the moment, yay.

See ya guys as soon as I can get my wireless back.