I've had them since the beginning of the year and the hospital did not tell me what was wrong with me.

Not to mention that the job center has been bugging me to get a new job while I've been looking at punishing my old one for treating me like shit. so yeah, once I win these 2 law suits I'll technically be retired.

thank fuck for that.

As of this day, I'm unemployed.

So. Due to my IBS flareups I may be potentially losing my job next Tuesday. It's been a good run of 22 years but I'm prepared for my inevitable sacking.

BUT FRET NOT!

I already have a multitude of job applications lined up and ready to go, should that fateful day come to it's predicted conclusion. one of which that depite my age, I intend to take on. I've been through enough shit in my life and had no opportunities that can benefit me. so I'm going all out and putting most of my money on the job that will be the hardest but will be the most beneficial to not only me but all those who require the service.

Yes................

I'm going to apply to become a Firefighter.


question is, Am I stupid for going down this route due the fact that I'm nearly 40? Am I completely bonkers? or am I brave?

I'll let you all be the judge of that.

This season drives me bonkers. There's a lot of illness going around at the moment and I've caught it. Right when I'm about to have a week off, Typical. I work my arse off and my reward is a bad cold. not to mention that my parent's carers are overusing the drier which drains the electricity like nobodys business, so I had to put the emergency supply on and reactivate the meter. speaking of parents. my father has been to hospital 3 times in 4 days. I have a sneaking suspicion that he's acting out because my mother came home at the end of november (Thanks BCP council for another shit decision) and he's upset that he's not the center of attention anymore.

so yeah. not having a good time of it at the moment, as soon as I get my own place I'm quitting my job and starting again. I just wish that the housing association would get a move on.

So I've noticed a trend about people hating on SFM because of it's limitations and I'd like to put across my opinions about it.

Not everyone has a powerful PC that can handle Blender, most of us have to make do with what we have. yes you may have access to advanced liquid physics and advanced tools for animation in general, but most of us don't. We have to do the same as what most of us did in the second world war, we make do with what we have, we're thankful for all the models we get and we're thankful for the fact that we're even able to make the images we do in the first place.

so if you're a blender user, I'm not going to chastise you for using it, however I will chastise you for looking down your noses at SFM users due to the fact that we either prefer it or do not have a computer powerful enough to use blender.

One day I shall come back, yes I shall come back. untill then there must be no regrets, no tears, no anxieties. Just go forward in all your beliefs, and prove to me that I'am not mistaken in mine.


Farewell.

Dad back in hospital, might not make it this time, keyboard broken, television remote broken, country now run by authoritarian scumbags. not doing great.

....I'd like some exposure. My latest image only garnered 2 faves. I thought the furry fandom liked stuff like that?

I hate it.

The theme from the C64 game called Monty On The Run got it's inspiration from Dick barton's Devils Gallop.


Here's Monty (wait for the drop).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4EcgruWlXnQ

Here's Devil's Gallop.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F2eqX93umXo


I swear there was inpiration for monty from the gallop. listen and compare.

It just takes me a while to recover from christmas.

as a man who has been forced to become my father's carer (thanks for that BCP council, you dicks) i still have to look after my father as well as take on Christmas overtime. so it basically renders me inactive for a while. I plan to get more renders out soon, just don't hold your breath.

seriously. I've just seen the first episode and it's magnificent. you can tell it's from someone who grew up in the 90's because it has Cowboy Bebop and Big O References in it.

Check out Monkey Wrench. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8i18HXAa1uY

I mean. It's not exactly a holiday is it?

You work your arse off for the sake of one day and you're exhausted by the time you get there. It's just over a week away and I'm tired out already. If it was a holiday, you'd be relaxing. Makes no sense at all.

When barely any porn is drawn of it.

I refer to a cartoon called Kung Fu Dino Posse.

Seriously. I've seen very little porn of those characters. The most I've seen is of Lucy the triceratops. There's one scene I saw in that dogshit show where she's playing ping-pong and had the paddle between her toes. You know where the animators heads were but that does not excuse bad animation and bad script writing.

When barely any porn is drawn of it.

I refer to a cartoon called Kung Fu Dino Posse.

Seriously. I've seen very little porn of those characters. The most I've seen is of Lucy the triceratops. There's one scene I saw in that dogshit show where she's playing ping-pong and had the paddle between her toes. You know where the animators heads were but that does not excuse bad animation and bad script writing.

Never done one before so I may as well, just to try and cheer myself up.

Ask me anything. also if you know about the multiple universes then please state if it's for a specific universe.

So here is the story.

In May my mother and father recieved a letter saying they owe roughly 400 quid in council tax. we had letters about that before then but they're missing. my family and I have been paying it off since before may this year. £100 per month before April and £150 per month after April.

here's the thing. Mother is in a care center suffering from alcohol based dementia and my father is dying from COPD. not to mention that he cannot read or write.

then all of a sudden we get a letter saying that we owe nearly £2000.

So i decided to call the collections agency that sent the letter. i spoke to them as you would with people like that. then at the end I informed them that I recorded the call.

then i decided to get my screenshots of all the payment reciepts i saved to help keep us safe. lo and behold, they magically vanished. I knew where i kept them too. the folder was always right on the desktop. so that got me worried. If things can vanish without my consent then things can appear without my consent.

So i contacted the press under advice from a friend who collects charity surplus from my workplace. the only one to get back to me was the daily Mirror.

If you ever decide you want to live in the UK..............DON'T. we have a government that is morally bankrupt, greedy, selfish, egotistical and basically has embraced the the era of the Thatcherites. they will destroy the country just for the sake of lining their own pockets. if they are challenged they will use any sort of dirty underhanded trick they can to get their way.

If there are any Brits watching me. do you remember when Boris Johnson showed off that big red bus that showed the amount of money he was going to give to the NHS? well i know for a fact that the NHS did not recieve a penny. It all went into that greedy, tory bastard's back pocket.

over 10 years of Tory misrule. they seem to have decided that 1984 and The New Statesman were good instruction manuals to run a country.

seriously. fuck this shithole of a country. we need a revolution.

This one is a bit of a turn up for the books.

I've been on my meds for a while now and the most prominant symptom is that they make me sleepy. very sleepy. my most recent sleep lasted from 11 at night to 3 in the afternoon.

I think I might need to contact the doctor again.

so it's happened. the one thing i did not want to happen.

I'm now on anti-depressant medication.

not to mention I've been signed off for another 3 weeks.

I never thought i'd be in this situation but here we are. I've essentially been labelled as a loony, a madcase, a nutter, a barmy bastard. I've officially lost my mind. what scares me the most is the fact that I've been told that during the time it takes for the medication to actually work, i could get very angry. I already have a problem with controlling my temper as it is. so if this medication makes me angrier, I'm scared in case i end up swinging something around my head that i should not be.

TLDR: I'm a loony, new meds, 3 weeks off, might kill someone.

Allow me to explain. I've been observing 2 artist who have developed a particular common paraphelia (which I will call X for the majority of this journal). I've wondered why so I've been racking my brains over this for a while. I'll not reveal the names of these particular artists so I'll refer to them by 1 and 2.

Subject 1.

This artist was responsible for a very popular set of flash animations that still get referenced and mimicked to this day. but due to harrasment that caused a great deal of stress, destress and depression, this artist ended up developing X to cope.

Subject 2.

An artist who has had leg problems all of their life, they even considered getting it amputated. over time back in the mid 2000's I noticed that this artist was slowly developing X. This artist is still quite active and still enjoys X.

And to myself. Due to 20 years of being pushed down, denied a future and generally being treated like a sub human piece of garbage. X has manifested itself in me. i had hints of it but now it's reached the point where it's undeniable.

I bet you're wondering what X is. well i lied. I'm going to let you figure it out. If you do manage to do that then I'll put your mind at ease. If it's not your cup of tea, then I'll not endulge. If you fully identify as male then I'll definately not be doing it, same if you're below the age of consent. hovever if it's your thing then i will do it but only if soap is used beforehand.

If you think you know the paraphelia i mention then slap your guesses in the comments below. bonus points if you can identify the artists. (You'll know the paraphelia eventually anyway.)

I've been signed off from work for 2 weeks due to severe depression. I knew this was coming. There was a trigger but I'll not mention what it was. It's not the person's fault. They meant well and have no idea. I haven't been able to stop my periodic crying fits or my hysterical fits. Everything just feels so hopeless to me right now. All I've worked for and I have nothing to show for it. I'm in a bad place right now and need time to recover.

It's now come to the point where I've not been able to make the full rent. £600 for a shitty hovel and I could only make £400. the council are ordering that we pay more and more to make up the lost council tax (it's the government equivelent of a mafia protection payment.). I payed what they asked for and that is what brings me to my current situation.

So I've decided to start taking commissions. I've not drawn up a price list yet as I'm not sure on what to charge. character per image? cheaper for SFW stuff? I'm completely in the dark with the whole commissions game. Not even sure what payment system to use. I've seen that Paypal is a popular one but I've seen over the years that one single slip up can cause you to lose your account.

I'm running about in the dark and looking for the light switch. I'm really hoping that i can get this up and running.

So, here's the story.

My credit card has gone over it's limit by £60 and it's taking a stupid amount every month. Because of this I'm pretty sure I've missed 2 of my patreon payments. It would have helped if i was told this by my credit card agent but no. I had to find out the hard way through no fault of my own (they have my phone number).

So I'm asking if the title of this journal holds any merit. Should I start taking commissions to help me sort this out?

Aside from a few nono's I'd have no problem rendering what people want. I'd ask what anyone thinks but no one responds to these things anyway.

Right. it's been far too many years and even though it's not my bag I'm going to put my point across using that long abandoned thing we used to use.

LOGIC!

this is what has riled me up.

"Update Regarding Upload Policy 2.7 - Content Involving Minors

Since Fur Affinity has taken the stance against fictional content featuring minors in sexual situations, we have continued to evolve our rules to prevent minors from being exploited and to ensure that our rules are equally applied.

Our most well-known change removed the classic “1000 year old loli vampire” loophole trope by expanding our definition of minors to include humanoids with childlike body proportions, including canonically adult characters who look like children. Such characters need to be aged-up accordingly (proportions changed to that of an adult) to be allowed in submissions containing sexual situations. These changes were well-received, and based upon additional feedback from our community, any reports we receive of Pokémon or Digimon who have childlike body proportions or appear as adolescent animals will be treated as any other when in the presence of sexual activity, sexual objects, nudity, or fetishized in a sexual way. This update will go into effect on July 1st, 2023.

We would like to reiterate this applies to those characters only with childlike proportions or are otherwise presented as children in sexual content as described above.

Accounts found in violation may receive a 1 week suspension and a final warning. Repeat violations may result in a permanent ban. If you believe that this change may impact your gallery, then you should delete any and all content that may violate our rules before July 1st, 2023.

If you have questions as to whether this may apply to your content, please feel free to open a ticket under “NSFW Underage Content” with links to the content in question, and we can verify if the content is in violation or not.

As always, thank you for being members of our wonderful and creative furry community. We hope that this update will continue to provide everyone with a safe and inclusive place to share your artistic endeavors and meet new and interesting people from all parts of our furry world.

Appended: Additional Clarification

Due to feedback we have received regarding this update, we are providing the following clarification on the changes that went live today.

- NO, there is no blanket ban across species.
- NO, there is no list of species that we will always take action on.
- YES, characters in your NSFW art must be aged up.
- NO, simply making something bigger or smaller does not indicate age.
- We look at anatomy proportionally alongside other context in submissions.

There is also some confusion as to the extent of the changes that went live today. Section 2.7 of the Upload Policy has been in effect for many months with its current wording. The only thing that changed as of this update is our internal policy on Pokemon and Digimon. Pokemon and Digimon are now actionable, if presented as children, when they were not in the past.

Again, small or otherwise cute adults, Pokemon/Digimon or not, will not be removed unless they proportionally/anatomically represent a child.

Please submit a Trouble Ticket as described above should you need additional clarification. Thank you!
Help keep FA independent and fund site updates! Support coding development by subscribing to FA+ (and get some pretty spiffy perks in the process!)."


This shit has gone on long enough. yes i know that many do not like such content. I'm on here because I'm not a fan of such content (I like big tits). the same reason applies with my not being on Inkbunny. but here's the thing. It's all fiction, fake, fictional characters. if you do not like looking at such content then do not look at it. it's the most simple thing in the world and yet so many people are so fucking stupid they cannot grasp the concept of "don't like, Don't Look". and as for studies. well it's been more than a decade and there has been no link to those who like lolisho and actual kiddy diddlers. do not confuse those who like lolis/shotas/cubs with actual pedos. Because the only people who benefit over rules/laws against such fictional content are the pedos themselves. I'll tell you why.

Because while everyone is getting outraged over people having a toss over young looking fictional characters' touchy tim the pedo is diddling little suzie next door. and it's mostly the pedos that call out those who enjoy fictional contentof that type in this day and age.

It's been over a decade. Grow the fuck up' build a bridge and get over yourself.

.......I think I'll start a little earlier.

that upload pile took it out of me.