i was stabbed last week in a vicious attack. they aimed for my heart but got my lung instead.

i also got stabbed through my drawing hand...

ill make a full recovery but itll be slow.

i nearly died....

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachme.....0/IMG_1258.jpg

i just want to take a moment and say im sorry if ive ever been an awful person.

i want to be better.

i dont want anything except your forgiveness.

please be safe everyone

I might nuke my gallery soon

this is a good thing. I'm starting over again, and this time, I'm not gonna screw it up!

.....

shut up.

For real though I am drawing a shit ton. This will be much better, soon.

does anyone do tabletop games?

is there a group that's willing to accept new players?

I keep trying. i really am trying to do art.

I work a blue collar, physical job most of the week that tires me the hell out.

I have very few family and friends, even less with the coronavirus.

It's goddamn hard finding inspiration.

I got myself a Kamvas Pro 12 Huion drawing tablet.

so... i might start posting again.

I make no promises. Except if the question is "will you love me forever"

Disclaimer: This isn't about songs, popularity, whatever. This is about how listenable the album on a whole is; if you like an album just for a few songs, it can't be a very good album. Here's a list of great chunks of music put together well.

Tab list of greatest albums:


Pixies - Tromp Le Monde
Electric Six - Señor Smoke
The Doors - The Soft Parade
Static X - Shadow Zone
Gost - Behemoth
Ludacris - Word of Mouf
Cocaine 80s - The Pursuit
Slick Rick - The Adventures of Slick Rick
Sonic Youth - A Thousand Leaves
Nick Drake - Pink Moon
Michael Jackson - Off The Wall
Grimes - Art Angels
Grimes - Visions
Dinosaur Jr - Beyond

probably more as i think of them

Really, all I want out of life is to be part of a D & D game. that's all.

Does anyone have a group? Can anyone invite me? I want to play.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ut5sk0RUlS4

Am I that old that no one knows who Vanessa Williams is?

I try to tell people about a band I like, LIONBABE, and I say "yeah the lead singer is Vanessa Williams' daughter" and they say "who" and it's like.... goddamn I'm old.

goddammit.

I have a ton of really articulate ideas running through my brain constantly.

What would y'all like to see me talk about?

I can wax poetic on the entire spectrum, motherfuckaz~

Let's talk about self esteem a moment, and its effect on our morals!

A lot of people struggle with self esteem. I would say, 99% of the world struggles. Most people have too little, some have too much. Very few are able to strike the balance needed for rational sanity. You want to believe in yourself that you can do something, but far too often many people are dependent on outside stimuli for their self esteem.

Recently, someone told me I should put my self in the shoes of my fellow conservative americans. I am very empathetic, and I often use this mental exercise of "put myself in their shoes" to try to gain a better understanding. But in this case, I simply can't. I explained in response to that someone that I cannot put myself in a conservative's shoes, because I have honor, dignity, and self esteem. In order to be conservative, I'd have to abandon my core values.

I won't say I never lie, because that would be a lie. Rather, I want to say that I have extreme faith and trust in the truth. The simple fact of lies is that they will ALWAYS be found out. A lie cannot last forever, it can barely last as long as the sound carries on the wind. Because lies are untrue, it's only a matter of time before the universe and reality itself provides evidence of the truth. If I was in a feud with someone and I called them a "rapist" without having any evidence of that; I just put myself on the line. With the truth comes out, I will be a liar. And that will destroy my self esteem. So I simply don't lie since I respect myself.

Honor is also one of my greatest weapons in building my self esteem. I give myself rules; there are things I will and won't do. If someone is willing to go to great depths for low blows, like making up lies about someone, spreading rumors, backstabbing, committing actual crimes against someone... That someone has no honor, and has no respect for himself, and is lacking in self esteem. This person is in great, great pain and refuses to believe it. Honor is a shield; if you have honor and you do honorable things, that means the people who view you will have a hard time thinking you can do evil. It's a great self-esteem booster, and not to mention, the concept of honor in your heart and brain has healing properties.

Dignity ties into this as well; none of us want to be rolling in shit. None of us want to have shit on our bodies; it's gross and disgusting. That's a simple thought everyone should have. Well, if you don't want to roll in shit, why ally yourself with Nazis, white supremacists, and other groups of criminals that have zero honor? These people have already lost so much dignity that they commit hate crimes while screaming. The American President thinks that those are 'good people.' But this hateful life is unhealthy and it deprives the human of self esteem, which eventually destroys their logic. These right wing people have no self esteem and thus have to dedicate their entire lives to the cause, which makes them extremists and radicals and terrorists. So many white people have gone on shooting sprees here in america... Some personal honor and dignity and self esteem could've stopped them.

I was sorta inspired to write this since I saw a video analyzing american right wingers, the loud ones on the internet. Laura Southern said herself, quote "for left wing content you can get that in real life, you can get that in person, your professors your teachers, from newspapers, left wingers do not need to go to the dark corners to find their opinions, where as right wingers do." And you know what, I agree 100% with this racist stupid dumb white cunt. "Left Wing Info" (which I would rather just call the truth) is available everywhere. If you want lies and hatred, you have to go to dark places. How is this not the obvious sign that you're in the wrong? How can you be sneaky about what you believe and think that what you believe is better than what other people? Right Wingers have zero self esteem and thus are perfect brainwash fodder to be nazi soldiers. You don't have to pick up a gun to be a nazi, you just have to deny climate change.

I'm not going to encourage people to be politically active, or to pick a fight or a struggle or debate or anything. But I want to encourage people to be strong. To have self esteem. Once you are a strong human, everything else will come easy. So be strong! When you become a better human being, you'll see everything clearly. You will be loved, and more importantly, you'll be able to give love <3

Today is an amazing day ♥

I feel like victory ♥

so i got picked for jury duty recently! so for a straight week that's all I did. And then I sorta forgot about this place.

The case was supposed to be normal case, then it ended up being crazy. I wanna ask: can any of you say that 25 years in prison for kicking down a door is appropriate? Man this was a crazy trial.

I got some drawings coming up, very soon.

I love all y'all~! Keep hope alive, people, keep fighting for good. there are two types of evil people, those who do evil and those who watch them do it. Be a good person instead <3

Remember you can report hate crimes to the police!

Here's the website for reporting UK offenders. https://beta.met.police.uk/true-vis.....rt-hate-crime/

https://antiracistaction.org/

The sad fact of the world is, there are evil and racist people out there. For some reason, since the elections not just in america but across the world, they feel empowered to attack minorities like myself. The law will not stop these people as white supremacists have a history of using illegal and underhanded means. It's up to us as a people to ostracize and fight racism at every turn. If they use violence on us, it only make sense to bring the violence back to them.

Let's scare these racists back into the caves they came out of. :)

if something bad happens to a bad person...

...is it wrong to feel happy about it?

I sorta want to disco dance sometimes.

I havn't made an update in a while. Only got a few sketchces; not enough for an artdump I think.

I wanna say, I love you ALL! Keep strong, and be kind to each other, people.

Weakness is giving into violence, weakness is attacking people over the internet like an internet tough guy.

Strength is rising above it all, admitting mistakes, and working to be a better person, and responding to the hate with love.

(Someone attacked me recently, with racial slurs, and then attacked a friend just for being my friend, spewing trans-phobic hate. here's just a little from the conversation he sent me: http://i.imgur.com/yhyan7s.png I'm not going to say who it is, though, because I'm a better person than he is,. ♥)

Keep strong everyone! Keep loving! ♥

no no no no no

noooooooooooo

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOo

I turn 30 today

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Fix those goddamn upside/down sideways pics, tab, from the goddamn art dump

DO IT DO IT DO IT DO IT

(this is mostly a reminder for myself but whatever)

Trevor, when denying that assholes are his friends: "I HANG OUT WITH A LOT OF PEOPLE I DON'T LIKE, IT'S ONE OF MY FAVORITE FUCKING HOBBIES"

Robot Cop, from R.O.T.O.R: "AAhh..... Umm....."

aaaaaaaaaaaaand

2am panic attack GO! Use INSOMNIA! use PTSD flashbacks!

fuuuuck kfsah'f ahljsdfkla'flhjALd;chja'h

It's hard being an artist. It's hard being crazy. It's hard being a crazy artist. I'm going to be 30 this month! MID LIFE CRISIS MODE ACTIVATE

seriously though, people. everyone needs love. Don't troll. Don't silently support trolls by not calling them out when they attack people. Be kind to each other out there. If you have an opportunity to be a dick, maybe just don't take that opportunity. Don't attack the weak, even if they deserve it. Don't abuse your friends. Sometimes you get emotional and it slips, and that's okay. As long as you're trying to be a good person that's okay. As long as you're trying. There are people out there who revel in hate and gloat about being a bad person. And none of us need that in our lives. Wouldn't you rather have love in your life?

Nothing in particular is leading me to say this. Well. More like, several minor things lead up to me saying this. One of the major ones, one that made me kinda quit drawing and hide from this community again for a while was me trying to befriend someone who was already known for being a psycho, only to have him go psycho on me. Maybe to him it was just trolling and hurting feelings, even worse so, as it started with him saying really fucked up not-funny jew jokes, and when I asked him to stop, he went full-psycho rant on me, calling me a zionist (which I'm not) along with other shit about israel (which I do not involve myself with at all) going full 100% racist antisemitie at me; to me, it caused me to not want to draw for a long time. But I'm getting back into it.

I've got some art I've been doodling here and there for friends over the months. I'm gonna try to get back into community things. I love you all. Please take it easy on each other out there. Also, take it easy on me, because I'm an over sensitive fucking pussy >w<

BE COOL ABOUT FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRE SAFETY

I want to do some trade requests, just to see how professionally I can do art for other people. I might take commissions at some point in the future when I am less of an insane moron that I am now.

SO, UM.

I want to take three spots for requests~! Free art, basically! you've seen my gallery, you know my strengths and my limitations. Please give me some ideas.

1.
2.
3.

Again, keep in mind that this is mostly a test for myself to see how well I can take requests. so be gentle <3

Note me, comment here, it's all good.

B
E
H
A
V
E

AGGRESSIVE~!

TELL ME I'M A MOBSTAH, LOOKIN SO FRESHA