Vatz's Journal
(be sure to read the rest dammit)

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Well...it's not very often I post happier news. But yesterday...well. Let's just say I realized I'm not capable of handling a normal relationship. I've been conditioned to do what others want and to take the fall for things, to expect them to pretend I don't exist and then be clingy when I try to leave for my own sake. I hate the idea of a mate and I will never fucking have one. But yesterday...I started a relationship. This is the first relationship I've ever started on my own. And it's a pure, uncomplicated one. I'm a pet now. I have an owner, and this is somebody I've always been able to trust with whatever was on my mind. He trusts me, too. We've known each other as friends (very close friends) for about two years. We've fooled around in IMs before, of course, but he didn't take them as an excuse to take me as his personal fucking emotional plaything (I sleep around online and off, for fuck's sake! random idiots aren't anything special!). Now I guess I am technically his plaything, but what people don't understand about BDSM is that it's all about trust. Both parties promise to respect hard limits that cannot be crossed. We've both made our conditions clear. They're just as sacred as the vows that bind a marriage, but essentially customizable to fit the needs of both people.

He didn't want me to post his name yet because he wants to clean his profile up first, but I'll put it up on Friday.
I...really feel good. I've never seriously considered the notion that I could be happy with somebody, but...I found this. And it feels better than any girlfriend-boyfriend relationship ever could.



Also, I'm going to design a shitload of shirts, skateboards (awwh yeah), and other assorted crap. I'm hoping to design lighters in the future.

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~Sanus in Refer Mores of Vicis~
http://www.zazzle.com/vatz_dat_coonfox