Alright, where do I begin? I've got to say that, as someone who doesn't partake in vore frequently, I was quite impressed by this piece. The high detail prose makes the story crawl along at a snails pace, relishing in every little image and sensation; it's wonderful in its darkness. The story gets straight to the point and never looks back, with almost no back story, character or complicated plot to weigh it down. It's clearly intended to be a quintessential fetish piece, and it works brilliantly. One thing that intrigued me was just how clockwork this was for the snake, like it could toy with and eat someone with no more interest than a normal person would pay a hamburger. A bit of back story on the rabbit would have been nice, but isn't essential for this sort of work. The slow, grinding torment by which the snake crushes his resistance would have been more interesting if you could endear the character to the audience just a little, unless you were aiming for something that I don't have the understanding of the fetish to understand. Another thing I liked was that you clearly did your research (or at least seemed to have), and knew your facts off hand. Very good stuff. Overall it was a very intense read, with a building weighty overtone that never quite gets released, and kind of reminded me of the way Vincent Pryce did horror. It's slow, glaring and consistent, much like a snake.

Again, this is a good story. Very good, even, but its' not perfect. Especially at the beginning there was some very spotty word choice and syntax that should have been fixed, mostly in and around the snake's dialogue, but that's a common mistake with writers and a good per-reader could have pointed those out. Luckily these syntactic issues get less prominent as the story goes on, and disappear entirely by the end, making the final arc seem just that much more intense in contrast.

All in all, this was a very solid story and I'm glad to have read it. All the nitty-gritty details really show to your advantage, but a handful of problematic areas break up the flow and should have been fixed. I give it an 82/100. I hope this review was helpful, and look forward to hearing your thoughts

Sincerely, Psudo Argyraspides.

When I go on furaffinity and download a text file myself, I often find that I have to scroll past pages upon pages of exposition in order to find what I came to FA for in the first place. I suppose writers here actually invest in their characters, but I never saw this site as much of an artist breeding grounds - my characters that I care for and write about aren't to be found around here. I wrote this as a description of the comic pages, one by one, flow isn't something I even considered throughout this - I often came back to some part just to add some descriptive bit I just read in some other fetish story without much consideration for the structure that might've screwed up.

Do I get extra points for not having English as my native language nor being a writer to begin with?

o.O Yes, yes you definitely get bonus points for that. Long-form cumulative syntax is a pain in the ass, even for those of us that practice it frequently, and you managed to pull it off nearly to perfection. I must say, well done. Frankly the structure worked fine as a single story, I didn't have any problems reading it. In fact that contributed to the long, slow pace that I enjoyed so much quite a bit. Another thing I liked was that the story says the same basic thing over and over again and it somehow never becomes overly stretched.

excellent.