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The Poor Little Snake Charmer
STORY INSPIRED AND WRITTEN FOR THIS MASTERPIECE: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/17775626/ - GO LOOK
Or, you know, wait until the story tells you to go look at that link. >_>
~~~
Also, SEQUEL: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18369613/
~~
I have to say, as always, it is my great pleasure to work with
WhiteMantis, who did an auction for four people to be featured in the above artwork (and this story!).
Lovely as ever, she is my perfect 'Partenaire En Transgressions', my muse, all mine. >:} *hoards the mantis* Oh, sorry, what was I saying?
Soon, I'll post the picture I linked to, so that I might properly gush over it; but for now, I wanted to say that this story was fun to write, and I hope Victor doesn't mind being thrust into the role of the.. antagonist -- look at it this way, it got you more screen-time! O:
Every time that a story just comes rushing out of my head without any hesitation or planning, it's a good feeling, and it happened on this one.
You might know what I mean; you go to plan something, and you imagine it might take you a while, but then.. Oops! It's done, it all came out in a rush without stopping to look around or even take a breath. Usually, there's a lot of uncertainly or indecision on the part of one person or another, but not this time.
Nae can testify to this. After asking to brainstorm the story, I - having not thought too too much about it, save for some vague characterizations of this 'version' of the snake and the mantis - instantly said something like, 'it should be fairly simple, it'll be like this..' and I proceeded to write the whole thing in a summarized format.
Eventually, I might admit that I can write a story, but for now, I'll call it a fluke!
After that, it was just a matter of writing it properly, in a not-so-summarized fashion. As always, a certain mantis kept me company. AND gave me feedback as I went. :}===<3
~
If you haven't read the story yet, enjoy! Looking forward to any comments. Unending favourites are nice, but comments are more interesting. :>
.
Or, you know, wait until the story tells you to go look at that link. >_>
~~~
Also, SEQUEL: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/18369613/
~~
I have to say, as always, it is my great pleasure to work with
WhiteMantis, who did an auction for four people to be featured in the above artwork (and this story!).Lovely as ever, she is my perfect 'Partenaire En Transgressions', my muse, all mine. >:} *hoards the mantis* Oh, sorry, what was I saying?
Soon, I'll post the picture I linked to, so that I might properly gush over it; but for now, I wanted to say that this story was fun to write, and I hope Victor doesn't mind being thrust into the role of the.. antagonist -- look at it this way, it got you more screen-time! O:
Every time that a story just comes rushing out of my head without any hesitation or planning, it's a good feeling, and it happened on this one.
You might know what I mean; you go to plan something, and you imagine it might take you a while, but then.. Oops! It's done, it all came out in a rush without stopping to look around or even take a breath. Usually, there's a lot of uncertainly or indecision on the part of one person or another, but not this time.
Nae can testify to this. After asking to brainstorm the story, I - having not thought too too much about it, save for some vague characterizations of this 'version' of the snake and the mantis - instantly said something like, 'it should be fairly simple, it'll be like this..' and I proceeded to write the whole thing in a summarized format.
Eventually, I might admit that I can write a story, but for now, I'll call it a fluke!
After that, it was just a matter of writing it properly, in a not-so-summarized fashion. As always, a certain mantis kept me company. AND gave me feedback as I went. :}===<3
~
If you haven't read the story yet, enjoy! Looking forward to any comments. Unending favourites are nice, but comments are more interesting. :>
.
Category Story / General Furry Art
Species Snake / Serpent
Size 120 x 120px
File Size 44.7 kB
Listed in Folders
Ahh! Thanks! :D I mean, thanks for the comment and the fave, and for faving Nae's art too! Although I know it'll get plenty, regardless of people who might see it through me. :}
Anyway, the bidding was pretty intense. I doubt I would have been able to beat the people who wanted (and got) slots, they were pretty generous! @_@
Anyway, the bidding was pretty intense. I doubt I would have been able to beat the people who wanted (and got) slots, they were pretty generous! @_@
Having given my favourite to miss WhiteMantis, allow me to do so here, as well.
I really like the general feel of the story; it is very intruiging, keeping interest high, and curiosity for the future, piqued!
Everybody's character is depicted so nicely here; it is akin to describing an event from ordinary life (albeit with much better prose), and makes everything seem that much more alive! Not once did I lose focus from the story; it would not let me!
This was a truly enjoyable composition, sir; highly immersive, fun and interesting to read, with its twists and atmosphere fitting for the occassion.
Excellent work, sir!
I really like the general feel of the story; it is very intruiging, keeping interest high, and curiosity for the future, piqued!
Everybody's character is depicted so nicely here; it is akin to describing an event from ordinary life (albeit with much better prose), and makes everything seem that much more alive! Not once did I lose focus from the story; it would not let me!
This was a truly enjoyable composition, sir; highly immersive, fun and interesting to read, with its twists and atmosphere fitting for the occassion.
Excellent work, sir!
Thank you very very much! :D
Of course, when the snake appears, you know he's going to get charmed, given the title of the story, heh, so that part where he looks like he might attack her isn't exactly tense. Still, I'm glad you liked it.
What you said about it being like an event from ordinary life, I wonder if you mean like.. while it's an extraordinary event in a very fictional setting (furries and all), you think that the way I wrote it makes it feel real, like something that was really happening, or could have really happened? Ie, it had great internal consistency?
Also, I have to say; you always have really nice, thoughtful comments; I've been seeing them on WM's work. and they stand out.
Thanks again, for the comment and the fave! Mostly for the comments, both here and on WM's post of the picture. :}===<
Of course, when the snake appears, you know he's going to get charmed, given the title of the story, heh, so that part where he looks like he might attack her isn't exactly tense. Still, I'm glad you liked it.
What you said about it being like an event from ordinary life, I wonder if you mean like.. while it's an extraordinary event in a very fictional setting (furries and all), you think that the way I wrote it makes it feel real, like something that was really happening, or could have really happened? Ie, it had great internal consistency?
Also, I have to say; you always have really nice, thoughtful comments; I've been seeing them on WM's work. and they stand out.
Thanks again, for the comment and the fave! Mostly for the comments, both here and on WM's post of the picture. :}===<
First off, you are very very welcome, sir!
Second, there is still a bit of intensity, personally; not meaning to diss miss Nae's skill in snake charming, but not everyone is perfect. I think it's like taking a look through the eyes of the audience present; they do not know if the snake before them is intelligent or feral, and they cannot know if the charmer has honed her skills to the point where the snake would be 'under her spell' consistently. It is from that, and the interactive nature of the act (audience and performer) that the tense atmosphere stems, I think. Plus, there are always the events occuring within the audience!
Third, I do indeed mean it had great internal consistency. Let me see if I can phrase my thoughts on this properly...
If our world's setting was similar to the one in the story (time period, living beings, et cetera), then it would be difficult to tell if this story was a fairy tale (prose and literature, depicting events of fantasy) or an artful depiction of actual events. I think that's how it goes!
And that both honours and humbles me, sir. Thank you for that.
Second, there is still a bit of intensity, personally; not meaning to diss miss Nae's skill in snake charming, but not everyone is perfect. I think it's like taking a look through the eyes of the audience present; they do not know if the snake before them is intelligent or feral, and they cannot know if the charmer has honed her skills to the point where the snake would be 'under her spell' consistently. It is from that, and the interactive nature of the act (audience and performer) that the tense atmosphere stems, I think. Plus, there are always the events occuring within the audience!
Third, I do indeed mean it had great internal consistency. Let me see if I can phrase my thoughts on this properly...
If our world's setting was similar to the one in the story (time period, living beings, et cetera), then it would be difficult to tell if this story was a fairy tale (prose and literature, depicting events of fantasy) or an artful depiction of actual events. I think that's how it goes!
And that both honours and humbles me, sir. Thank you for that.
Thanks for the comment, Sirus, as always. I guess I'm just a corny guy. Or I felt like being flippant after being a bit more formal throughout the main body of the story.
And as for 'happy explosions', I am sure I do NOT know what you could possibly mean..! 9_9
Also, thank you for the fave. :}
And as for 'happy explosions', I am sure I do NOT know what you could possibly mean..! 9_9
Also, thank you for the fave. :}
I'll take 15/5, because that's 300%! 8D
Thank you very very much for your exhaustive (and, just maybe.. exhausting?) review/comment, Felldewan!
I'm not sure what I can say to respond to this, aside from expressing my heartfelt gratitude for the effort you made and the time you took to write all that.
I was very happy with the intro, yes. A good intro draws the reader in and sets their expectations, of course, yes.. but moreso, when I manage to have a good beginning, I'm personally all the more energized to keep moving forward with what I'm doing, when I write.
I'm happy you could be so shocked/surprised/chilled by the idea of 'Python' pouncing forward and protecting the money from the jackal.
Oh, and you said you'd bid and get a slot in the next group pic. Well, good luck! It got pretty 'big-spender'-ish in there. @_@ Also, you want me to just make up someone from your icon? You know, people provided references for their characters, with this auction, it's not just icons. But, in your case, with THAT icon, I'd basically make your character look and act like Link from the Legend of Zelda. >_>
Hrmm! I never thought anyone would think that a python and a mantis were father and daughter. Maybe you meant that emotionally, not in a true physical/biological sense.
Also, I'm very happy that I could give the impression of Python actually being bestial. I figured everyone would know he was a fake. Or, at least, there would be no sense of nervousness or tension when he was sneaking up on the Charmer and looked like he would attack her.
Anyway, thanks again! :}===<
Thank you very very much for your exhaustive (and, just maybe.. exhausting?) review/comment, Felldewan!
I'm not sure what I can say to respond to this, aside from expressing my heartfelt gratitude for the effort you made and the time you took to write all that.
I was very happy with the intro, yes. A good intro draws the reader in and sets their expectations, of course, yes.. but moreso, when I manage to have a good beginning, I'm personally all the more energized to keep moving forward with what I'm doing, when I write.
I'm happy you could be so shocked/surprised/chilled by the idea of 'Python' pouncing forward and protecting the money from the jackal.
Oh, and you said you'd bid and get a slot in the next group pic. Well, good luck! It got pretty 'big-spender'-ish in there. @_@ Also, you want me to just make up someone from your icon? You know, people provided references for their characters, with this auction, it's not just icons. But, in your case, with THAT icon, I'd basically make your character look and act like Link from the Legend of Zelda. >_>
Hrmm! I never thought anyone would think that a python and a mantis were father and daughter. Maybe you meant that emotionally, not in a true physical/biological sense.
Also, I'm very happy that I could give the impression of Python actually being bestial. I figured everyone would know he was a fake. Or, at least, there would be no sense of nervousness or tension when he was sneaking up on the Charmer and looked like he would attack her.
Anyway, thanks again! :}===<
You know, making icons isn't really all that hard. I do it in MSPaint all the time. I just did these a few minutes ago:
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u.....0224/Icon1.png
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u.....0224/Icon2.png
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u.....0224/Icon3.png
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u.....0224/Icon4.png
But if you want a brand new, custom icon, with a lot of awesome packed into those 100x100 pixels, go to
commissionsbyj -- See? https://www.furaffinity.net/view/14390958/
And yeah, I suppose I should have known what you meant, or should have known you didn't mean literally, biologically father and daughter. But you're right, as ever with any snakes and mantids that Nae and I get our hands on, the snake will be a big protector to the little bug, more than likely.
As for Python's beastliness, I figure it's probably half and half in my readership, 50% thinking he'd really be a monster/feral/primitive, the other guessing he was acting.
Anyway, thanks again for the whole review!
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u.....0224/Icon1.png
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u.....0224/Icon2.png
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u.....0224/Icon3.png
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u.....0224/Icon4.png
But if you want a brand new, custom icon, with a lot of awesome packed into those 100x100 pixels, go to
commissionsbyj -- See? https://www.furaffinity.net/view/14390958/And yeah, I suppose I should have known what you meant, or should have known you didn't mean literally, biologically father and daughter. But you're right, as ever with any snakes and mantids that Nae and I get our hands on, the snake will be a big protector to the little bug, more than likely.
As for Python's beastliness, I figure it's probably half and half in my readership, 50% thinking he'd really be a monster/feral/primitive, the other guessing he was acting.
Anyway, thanks again for the whole review!
I suppose I share a few of the feelings others had with this tale! Without the context of the rest of your work in mind it seems like the python could actually be a non-sentient or even just a more feral being (as they reference more primitive existing reptilian tribes). I think it comes out that way because the perspective is externally focalized through the understanding of the local citizens and their reactions. As we get the more focused perspectives of the featured characters we get their perspective of the situation and in that we start believing as they do (at least I do). When it reaches the part with the jackal antagonist (because of his crude attitude); I think we don't want to believe him because he's causing possible conflict to negatively impact our beloved mantis and python. I think you'd commented earlier that the conflict may be perceived that our protagonists 'get caught', but I don't know if there are any hints to them being charlatans (on a first pass up this point).
But, in any case, I got caught up and was somewhat surprised at the end to find they were both just performers! It drew me in and I enjoyed it!
And I adore the adorable exchange at the end, of course.
But, in any case, I got caught up and was somewhat surprised at the end to find they were both just performers! It drew me in and I enjoyed it!
And I adore the adorable exchange at the end, of course.
Thanks so much for your thoughts, once more!
I'm going to have to re-read this one too. People were really complimentary here in the comments. I'll have to see what all the fuss isw/was about, haha. :}===<
I'm glad that Charmer and Python could con even you, Cagira! :>
Thanks for the fave on this and on the other Snake & Charmer picture, the one with the poem, from before.
[Also: During the dialogue at the end, the talk of conveniently placed hay bales was a reference to Assassin's Creed, I wonder if anyone got that. No one mentioned it in the other comments, I think. I reference AC because the entry in that series subtitled 'Revelations' was set in Constantinople/Istanbul, which was partially the inspiration for some of this art and story.]
I'm going to have to re-read this one too. People were really complimentary here in the comments. I'll have to see what all the fuss isw/was about, haha. :}===<
I'm glad that Charmer and Python could con even you, Cagira! :>
Thanks for the fave on this and on the other Snake & Charmer picture, the one with the poem, from before.
[Also: During the dialogue at the end, the talk of conveniently placed hay bales was a reference to Assassin's Creed, I wonder if anyone got that. No one mentioned it in the other comments, I think. I reference AC because the entry in that series subtitled 'Revelations' was set in Constantinople/Istanbul, which was partially the inspiration for some of this art and story.]
Ah, yes! I did understand the hay reference. Though I didn't play any AC games, many years back my old roommates played them and I was... critical about someone surviving a bail into the hay from heights abound-- especially the convenience of the supposedly cushiony material.
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