Three months, and no comments? You should give me a bit of a kick more often, I think!

I really liked what you did with this story. It flowed really naturally from beginning to end, and I was particularly impressed by how the trial by fire played out. While it was pretty clear that the students would be thrust into some kind of situation that had been contrived by their instructors, I really liked how you were able to pull the reader into events along with them and how we, along with the students, were suddenly thrust into the scenario without warning. That they were so close to the enemy border really helped with that, I think, as there was the possibility that the attack on the manor was genuine, which really helped to amp up the tension and to keep the reader off-balance along with the students.

I found the youngsters very compelling, especially Susan, as she was the one I would have guessed would be in over her head a bit. I knew that Mack was going to be a problem, and I was pretty sure from the outset that he likely wouldn't do very well. But there was something in Susan's manner that made her seem a lot more hesitant and skittish than she ultimately proved to be, and I was really pleased to see her prove herself so well. Maybe it was just a personal thing, since, of all the students, I could kind of see myself in her position more than in those of the others. I did think she was really sweet, though. I had no doubt that Topaz would do well in the test, but it was still nice to see how well she did and she'd be just the sort of leader that I think I'd be glad to follow, myself.

I really like Nathan as well. He reminds me a lot of some of my favorite professors from college, and he seems to have an admirable respect for the history and traditions of his homeland. He strikes me as particularly brave, as well, given that his chosen home seems to be so close to enemy territory, and he seems like a good choice for this sort of exercise as he's both willing to push students to excel but compassionate enough to understand the follies and uncertainties of youth. I was particularly struck by the fact that, even when it is decided that Mack is most likely an unsuitable candidate, there still seemed to be a degree of compassion and understanding for him and that, it seemed to me, this didn't necessarily mean he couldn't be valuable in other ways. All in all, this was a really interesting glimpse into your world and into the inner workings of the Talywn, and it was a really fun little story as well. I'll be interested to see what becomes of all of these characters in the future, but especially Topaz and Susan, and I do kind of hope that Mack won't completely vanish from the picture, either.

I know, I didn't expect an instant response, never do, but after a couple of weeks I was a little surprised. :) Everyone's busy these days, but I'm glad you got to read it. ;)

This story was not in the original plan, but when I decided I was going to see what Lauren and Chris were doing during the war, (Sierra Point and Relativity), I felt I should also check in on Topaz seeing as she hadn't really appeared since "The First Lesson". That said, it seemed like a good excuse to also bring Nathan into another story since at least until they all meet in the comic Chris, Lauren, Kyle, and Topaz all only danced around each other, it couldn't be Lauren directly and many of the other masters would either be occupied or ineligible, as her mother Lynn points out. Anyway, it seemed like a good idea and since Topaz, Chris, and Kyle get their own novella during the occupation it seemed like a good gap to fill.

I'm glad it came across so well, I've always believed that while you can lie to someone's face your actions betray your true intentions. That's why it was so important to put them in a situation with no adults and no orders to see what they do. You learn a lot about a person by what they do when they don't think they're being watched. I think that their proximity to the border was definitely a key ingredient and another reason I chose Nathan and Ardis. I mean, you know they're testing the students, but if you don't know it's real, are you going to take the chance it isn't? It keeps both the characters and the readers guessing, because the kids are in adrenaline mode, and the audience has no way of knowing if this was part of the plan or not.

I had a good amount of fun developing the new characters here. I knew I wanted a group of four, since it would be the easiest to manage for a story like this. That said, Topaz was obviously the first pick. I decided I wanted a rogue element (Mack), a relatively quiet girl (Susan), and someone that would more or less back Topaz up since the two of them were on relatively the same wavelength. I kind of developed their personalities as I was writing the evaluations that the masters were reading, and it all came together fairly quickly. Susan is definitely an intellectual, but they needed to see how she'd do outside of a strictly academic environment, which she repeatedly dodged. Mack also gave me a chance to talk more about the Talwyn crystals and the regulations surrounding them. So far we've only seen people that use them properly and legally, but Mack let me play with someone who is more excited by the power of them than the responsible use of that power. Topaz has always been a girl who's had to grow up fast, but she's always been a sweet girl regardless of what life has thrown at her and that's one of the reasons I've always loved her character.

In fairness, his home only became near enemy territory in the past few years. Before then, it was just nearby a foreign country. However, due to what it means to him and to his people, he couldn't very well move when things started to get complicated. It also seemed rather logical to have a master right on the door of the potentially hostile power. Nathan appears in two more stories in the second volume that take place during the occupation, where you find out a little bit more about what happens to him after this.

Though Susan, Logan, and Mack had only really been planned for this one story I do actually have a potential use for them later on, so I wouldn't count anyone out until they're dead. ;)