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2021: The Review
4 years ago
General
I'm taking this tradition of mine to this account too.
This one has been... Strange. I'd say that there's a very clear split. Half of the year was consistently fine and the other half blew.
I'll start off with some news regarding my mental health, because I don't consider the diagnosis either good or bad. I think it's helpful, but I have no strong feelings about it.
I was recently diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. I've always sort of suspected a personality disorder, but in recent years I thought it would have been paranoid. The stigma of the illness will and does suck, but I've been thinking of it like a pest infestation. You gotta know what kind of pest you're dealing with to set the correct traps, no good putting down anti-slug powder if you have a rat problem.
This came after taking a two month sick leave from work because I was just Suffering. A lot of old habits became the norm again. However, through some wonderful fuck up this meant that I now owed work 70+ hours. Which they just snatched from two months of pay. One month I got paid absolutely nothing and had to survive on borrowed money. But I recently managed to get that sorted in a round about way, but in the end I won and that's all that matters. But it's for sure had a massive impact on my health and my art.
In much more recent news, I currently have covid. Now, I'm not out there maskless and licking door handles. I've worn masks consistently since April 2020 and am doubled vaxxed. But I deal with a lot of anti-maskers and anti-vaxxers at work so... it's more surprising I didn't catch it earlier. Unfortunately, it meant that I have been spending the holidays on my own. It wasn't too bad to spend Christmas by myself but there were certainly people and things I missed. Like seeing Hydro, my cats, my mum, our Traditional Christmas Breakfast and annual Cards Against Humanity game. But if I pass this on to someone it could kill I wouldn't be able to live with myself.
But there has been a good number of good things this year! I finally built my PC and she's a Monster. I've never had a machine this good and there's so much comfort in knowing that I can replace and fix specific broken things instead of having to buy a whole new machine.
Hydro and I started dating! It's been wonderful, I do often feel bad that I'm not the most... outwardly receptive person when it comes to positive emotions but they understand and I'm so happy to have someone who does understand.
I've gotten into better daily habits, I try and do some exercise everyday and make sure I'm properly dressed the moment I get out of bed. Making better lunches for work instead of just buying garbage on my break.
I've been able to see friends I haven't seen in years (safely) and had a blast with them.
Gotten back into writing and the response I've gotten has been wonderful!
2022. I'm hoping for the best. I've got therapies coming up in the new year to help keep a handle on stuff and process some things that continue to haunt me and I'm ready to face them. I just want to go more with the flow and see what the year brings rather than try and make a solid plan for myself.
Now if only I could stop working on Fridays for Game Night ;w;