First off, I want to say a true and honest sorry to everyone who's been trying to keep in touch with me - I haven't been very responsive (partly because I've been isolating myself a bit), and for me to disappear after making such a serious journal wasn't fair to you guys, or to myself.

Truth is - I've been having really hard times with my ex-boyfriend, as you guys might know him, Alexandre here on FA. I still really like him, and would love nothing more than to let him know how I feel and to have him back in my life...but he's been giving me really mixed signals about how he feels, and it's just been super frustrating for me lately, enough that I've lost some sleep over it.

But rather that simply cool down, I carelessly vented some of my frustrations here on FA, leaving a few of you hurt, confused, and concerned. And then, to top that off, I disappear from contact just when I should have been seeking help. And the worst part is, a lot of you were offering to help. I want to say sorry for how I acted.

However, despite how much I messed up, I still think my last journal had an ounce of truth to it.

The thing is, I like being a big guy (and a big wolf, for that matter). And part of that was that I enjoyed the occasional playful teasing, but all in good fun, of course. The problem was, occasional became constant, and eventually playful became serious. It was just getting a bit overwhelming, not having anything to say unless it was about my weight.

Despite all that, though - I still want to gain weight, IRL and as my wolf Simmy. That being said, you can still give me the playful tease now and then.

But...

Do try to mix it up now and then, okay? ^^ I'm a real person, and I love to talk about lots of things you'd be surprised if ya give me the chance ^^

Thanks, most of all, for understanding - you all are the best, and I'm lucky to have you