A couple of months ago, my mum was diagnosed with cancer. The oncologist said they've caught it early, but they won't be entirely sure what stage it is until they surgically remove the organ in question or whether they have to check the lymph nodes too. The CT scan didn't seem to show any metastasis, so there is hope that the surgery is all she needs. That is tomorrow, and while she'll be well taken care of, I am still terrified. I've been putting on a brave face, trying to pretend that things are normal - showing massive outbursts of emotion is not something I typically do as I tend to keep things to myself. I had quite a bit of time to absorb things, to think about things, to internally study the hundred different potential scenarios that may play out, both good and bad. My mum's very stubborn in that she said not to worry too much and live your life as normal. And of course, I've been trying to do that... but at the back of my mind, that pessimistic feeling's gonna be there. And as this day went on, that feeling was harder to contain. What makes it even more harder is that there's no prognosis as of yet, because usually they give the patient that after surgery.

With that said, there is a possibility that I may be largely inactive for several weeks as I will be taking care of my mum as she may need chemo and/or radiotherapy as well as recovering from the surgery. So if you see me unresponsive or offline for long periods of time, this is the reason why. My mind's in a maelstrom right now, but I am concentrating on the fact that the surgery is generally very successful for cases like this. The important thing is that my mum is in good spirits about it, though she does use the "whatever will happen, will happen" mantra quite a bit. Whatever happens, I gotta stay strong.

Please take care of yourselves and cherish every moment you have with your loved ones.