- As long as I cant find SJWs to believe my history with out calling me a "fake" or "liar and forcing me to reveal RL contacts that could get me charged for Criminal Harassment or expose me to libel for discussing the local regional disparities of care for the disabled who have mental health issues and autism.

- As long as my medical team leaves my trauma untreated and refuses to even look at it as a legitimate problem. Instead of burying it in Temazepam

- As long as I'm not really accepted by the communities i belong to for the above 2 reasons and as I cycle in interaction level depending on the size of my 'ballz in bringing up my RL issues. As well as my tolerance for mental health politics with my 'care team'.

- As long as social withdrawal without risk of death remains an issue that can be used as sole criteria for involuntary admission and intervention in Ontario.

(its either talk about my issues and be ostracized, banned, excluded, ignored, or ridiculed or I don't socialize at all because I cant suffer in silence. Otherwise I go psychotic needing more involuntary admission and meds that cause liver failure and/or morbid obesity. MAID may be my only option if Canada doesn't get its ass in gear on an autism strategy for these issues- though I would be breaking a promise to some elite few if I did decide to end my suffering.)


I tripled up last night thinking it be neat not to have my "thing bulge" be shown up in a picture of me padded. I promised a couple of very loved selected few a picture of me padded 6 months ago...

It was crazy comfy, but it was 2 am and I don't have the 150CAD for a decent webcam right now... So a picture is impossible this round of padding - sadly.

I fell asleep "triple-padded" and had horrible nightmares of past "interaction cycles" that have led to bans and serious legal trouble and I work up just sad and distraught.

Maybe i shouldn't be padding up either anymore....