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Log Date 1-1-23: New Year
3 years ago
Howdy there, friend,
It's the new year, woo. Honestly, considering I start this year covering for a co-worker going on vacation, immediately after working my ass off during the holidays I don't exactly have the energy to look forward with optimism.
But that's not really fair, there is some bright patches. For starters, my dad is doing better; He's gotten stronger and is finally out of the hospital, and even has a new electric wheelchair for getting around. Heck, he and mom are even planning fun outings and whatnot once the proper accessibility things are set up around the house. It almost feels like things are finally getting better for them, and they're excited for the future.
Now if only I could feel the same. To be blunt, I just don't feel anything for the new year. Like, I don't feel pessimistic that it'll be as bad as the last two, but I don't dare even raise my hopes it'll be better. I kinda just feel lost. I don't feel like I have a purpose or future to look forward to, that I'm just going through the motions exhausting myself to death at work, or just waiting on-call for the next inevitable disaster to hit my family and I.
I wish I could quit my job but I have no other avenue for employment; No other area within biking distance is better than my current job, I don't have a car or a drivers license and the prospect of driving terrifies me, I have no notable talents or skills, I can't work with people consistently due to my long-standing social issues and lack of patience with the general public, and I've just come to the conclusion that being self-employed and doing art as a living simply would not work. So ultimately I just feel stuck with no options outside putting up with the exhausting lack of coverage in my department at work and my horrible shift-lead.
Tl;dr, Family is doing better and looking forward to the future, I'm not and wish I was.
Despite all that, I have at least been making some mental plans I wanna do this year, starting with Terysium. I say it so much but I really do want to get the current arc done this year, and hopefully relatively soon this year. I have plans for doing some reformatting, and some mild changes here and there to better fit the new vision I have for it, as well as a new home for it! Shard found a comic-hosting site and I plan on putting Terysium there once the aforementioned changes are done. I'll still upload pages here no doubt but it'll be nice to have a proper hub for Terysium to link to.
As for the rest of my art, I guess nothing is really changing; I'm still just going to draw and post whatever I end up drawing, but I s'pose I'm curious what you guys would wanna see more of?
I guess that's all my thoughts for now, take care of yourselves and may your own 2023's be optimistic!
But that's not really fair, there is some bright patches. For starters, my dad is doing better; He's gotten stronger and is finally out of the hospital, and even has a new electric wheelchair for getting around. Heck, he and mom are even planning fun outings and whatnot once the proper accessibility things are set up around the house. It almost feels like things are finally getting better for them, and they're excited for the future.
Now if only I could feel the same. To be blunt, I just don't feel anything for the new year. Like, I don't feel pessimistic that it'll be as bad as the last two, but I don't dare even raise my hopes it'll be better. I kinda just feel lost. I don't feel like I have a purpose or future to look forward to, that I'm just going through the motions exhausting myself to death at work, or just waiting on-call for the next inevitable disaster to hit my family and I.
I wish I could quit my job but I have no other avenue for employment; No other area within biking distance is better than my current job, I don't have a car or a drivers license and the prospect of driving terrifies me, I have no notable talents or skills, I can't work with people consistently due to my long-standing social issues and lack of patience with the general public, and I've just come to the conclusion that being self-employed and doing art as a living simply would not work. So ultimately I just feel stuck with no options outside putting up with the exhausting lack of coverage in my department at work and my horrible shift-lead.
Tl;dr, Family is doing better and looking forward to the future, I'm not and wish I was.
Despite all that, I have at least been making some mental plans I wanna do this year, starting with Terysium. I say it so much but I really do want to get the current arc done this year, and hopefully relatively soon this year. I have plans for doing some reformatting, and some mild changes here and there to better fit the new vision I have for it, as well as a new home for it! Shard found a comic-hosting site and I plan on putting Terysium there once the aforementioned changes are done. I'll still upload pages here no doubt but it'll be nice to have a proper hub for Terysium to link to.
As for the rest of my art, I guess nothing is really changing; I'm still just going to draw and post whatever I end up drawing, but I s'pose I'm curious what you guys would wanna see more of?
I guess that's all my thoughts for now, take care of yourselves and may your own 2023's be optimistic!
