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2 years ago
Hello!
I need to get this off my chest. I was going to just save this rant for the Discord server, but I feel like this needs to be more public so I can at least have a chance of reaching out towards someone.
Tonight, I had an epiphany.
I realized I've been extremely de-motivated as of lately and that's mainly because I'm not very confident in my own art. I've been trying to ape better ones but every attempt comes short, failing to copy them in both skill, management, and even aesthetics.
As a result, I've started regressing into an isolated state of stagnation. never really going anywhere, only existing.
To be honest, I am scared of being this noticeable, getting this huge and taking on a huge workload, I've never been very good with participation in social circles, only observing because I get immensely overwhelmed.
The thing is, I want to be free and meet more people, be more open about what I'm into, and especially draw more things for myself and others because that's mainly what I joined this community for.
I know this sounds like a short ramble, my ADHD is acting up and I wanna get this out of the way but if anyone is reading this and can understand what I'm feeling right now, I'd appreciate it if you could tell me. I just hate being alone sometimes, you know?
Tonight, I had an epiphany.
I realized I've been extremely de-motivated as of lately and that's mainly because I'm not very confident in my own art. I've been trying to ape better ones but every attempt comes short, failing to copy them in both skill, management, and even aesthetics.
As a result, I've started regressing into an isolated state of stagnation. never really going anywhere, only existing.
To be honest, I am scared of being this noticeable, getting this huge and taking on a huge workload, I've never been very good with participation in social circles, only observing because I get immensely overwhelmed.
The thing is, I want to be free and meet more people, be more open about what I'm into, and especially draw more things for myself and others because that's mainly what I joined this community for.
I know this sounds like a short ramble, my ADHD is acting up and I wanna get this out of the way but if anyone is reading this and can understand what I'm feeling right now, I'd appreciate it if you could tell me. I just hate being alone sometimes, you know?
Been there plenty, so I know maddening it can be.
I just draw what I want and only care for what I want.
You should try and satify yourself before others.
May not mean much coming from a stranger like me, but if you ever wish to chat about stuff, I'm all ears.
I personally can not give you advice on how to approach the great deal of attention you have been receiving. What I can say is that it is never a bad idea to create boundaries. Like yourself, I too struggle to strive in social circles. I have found that I work best alone, and that is okay! Working alone does not mean you can not receive help.
Your feelings towards your work are not uncommon. You must take a few steps back and ask yourself what you really want. Listen to your heart! If your heart tells you that you want to draw what you want, then do it! You do not have to prove or appeal to anyone but yourself. In time, people will discover you and like you for what you do.
There is a video I watched a few months ago that discusses the very same feelings you are experiencing. I recommend you give it a listen. It helped me, so it might help you too! The artist in the video is primarily an animator, but his words can be applied to any creative scenario.
I wish you the best!
https://youtu.be/4FpXRQ84tjw