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Where should I even post my art & stuff? @w@
3 years ago
There are so many parts for this and prepare for an essay below
So I have naturally accrued a crap ton of art over the course of time since my last dump and as much as I can go along with the productive idea of “do something with the art and have others enjoy it rather than rot away in a personal archive”, I’m kinda running out of reasons to do so that could be qualified as a depressed/defeatist running away from responsibilities and project efforts.
First off, right here. I liked uploading here to essentially have a full quality gallery of all my stuff that is publicly available, as well as give me a chance to do little writing prompts for each piece.
That full quality benefit has unfortunately been ripped away from me without paying for the FA+ sub, leaving me with what? A fat stack of Faves that I will never acknowledge like those with way too much time on their hands that personally thank people for every follow they get as a profile shout (On top of always referring to the action of “watching” as “giving a watch”? Come on people it’s not a noun)? Only ever gaining attention in the comments from only the laziest of simps that don’t give me anything to banter off of from an “omg so hot” or “hehe would love that to be me”?
Unlike an artist creating a profile, in a very reductive way that ignores the self expression of characters and worlds I’ve created which can have just as much artistic value to share with others, I have nothing to gain from here other than a tabulated spreadsheet of how much money I’ve compulsively dumped into yiff and art.
Next, Twitter. I’m of so many minds on the usability of the bird site. Wanting it to die in the hands of the Chief Twit, admitting defeat that all of my friends and people I like are still on there, lets me poke at people who are generally quiet in public by at least getting into their heads through comments, its short form micro blogging is my favorite form of a social media for intermittent thoughts and feelings, remembering why I want it to die as it continually twists and changes with the most recent unusable change being if you follow an account but they’re search banned, the follow doesn’t take priority over the search ban so you’ll never be able to find them in searches or mentions and there is no fucking way I can remember everyone I care about’s handles bc like 95% of the people i follow are absolutely search banned.
It almost makes the poor concept of having it as a competent art gallery pale in comparison for the overall usability and stability of the site. Also I end up with the same engagement issues as FA, jack squat of people I enjoy chatting with.
Metatext is my ideal twitter replacement, but people still aren’t making the switch over so it maintains most of the lack of the engagement points as the other two.
And then there’s discord/telegram, my only real options to get attention. I have a whole ass server, full of a lot of the people I actually like (but unfortunately aren’t regulars so the only real members are less favorable choices) inherited from the eternally anxious but good bean
azolt, and I have done jack fuck all with any of that. I just can never bring myself to do anything with the vicious cycle of “I want to do a thing, but nobody’s here to do it with”, “nobody’s here bc I don’t do anything” ad nauseam. Even with poppin’ servers I am a mod for, I just can’t bring myself to arrange anything or invite people for things.
And god forbid I actually get that praise and affection I oh so desperately desire. I can’t handle it. I tease and fantasize at arms length because I’m just so hyper sensitive that even the slightest exposure to kink talk without sexual intent make me too flustered to comfortably play along. I keep downplaying praise and I toss back and forth on the power struggle of Dom v. Sub, it keeps messing with me whether I want to be worshipped like a puppy or hand squeezing it from those beneath me, switch positions be damned. Its just too flip flopping how I want to take things.
And as far as claims of me being selective of friends in favor of big names based on what I just mentioned with the discord servers, I’ve discussed this with others but no it’s not clout chasing. I just think they’re neat dorks to hang around, I get a read on those people’s vibes a lot faster than people I see around a server and naturally want to be with people whose vibes I like, and at the end of the day they all get tossed to the side all the same like a rich kid’s toys because I find out they’re just ordinary people with dime-a-dozen social interactions I can get from anyone else so I learn to settle with those around me rather than head hunting, and the cycle just repeats.
I feel like I’m relapsing on bad, depressive habits and unmotivated mindsets that just leave me shut up and not really feeling like sharing things with others. It’s like near bipolar how these moods hit me like now. Just suddenly low energy, always wanting to sleep even when taking my meds. Also just been very iffy on commissioning which is good since I definitely could cut down on those and can be more tactical by getting more pieces with others rather than compulsively getting YCHs, but does still drain the overall motivation to coordinate with people and open artists.
This had a few tangents, but still circles back to what should I do? I know not all appreciation needs to be vocalized but still, it goes a loooooong way to getting enjoyment of out this debatably narcissistic side of the community. What would yield the best responses from people I actually enjoy talking to?
So I have naturally accrued a crap ton of art over the course of time since my last dump and as much as I can go along with the productive idea of “do something with the art and have others enjoy it rather than rot away in a personal archive”, I’m kinda running out of reasons to do so that could be qualified as a depressed/defeatist running away from responsibilities and project efforts.
First off, right here. I liked uploading here to essentially have a full quality gallery of all my stuff that is publicly available, as well as give me a chance to do little writing prompts for each piece.
That full quality benefit has unfortunately been ripped away from me without paying for the FA+ sub, leaving me with what? A fat stack of Faves that I will never acknowledge like those with way too much time on their hands that personally thank people for every follow they get as a profile shout (On top of always referring to the action of “watching” as “giving a watch”? Come on people it’s not a noun)? Only ever gaining attention in the comments from only the laziest of simps that don’t give me anything to banter off of from an “omg so hot” or “hehe would love that to be me”?
Unlike an artist creating a profile, in a very reductive way that ignores the self expression of characters and worlds I’ve created which can have just as much artistic value to share with others, I have nothing to gain from here other than a tabulated spreadsheet of how much money I’ve compulsively dumped into yiff and art.
Next, Twitter. I’m of so many minds on the usability of the bird site. Wanting it to die in the hands of the Chief Twit, admitting defeat that all of my friends and people I like are still on there, lets me poke at people who are generally quiet in public by at least getting into their heads through comments, its short form micro blogging is my favorite form of a social media for intermittent thoughts and feelings, remembering why I want it to die as it continually twists and changes with the most recent unusable change being if you follow an account but they’re search banned, the follow doesn’t take priority over the search ban so you’ll never be able to find them in searches or mentions and there is no fucking way I can remember everyone I care about’s handles bc like 95% of the people i follow are absolutely search banned.
It almost makes the poor concept of having it as a competent art gallery pale in comparison for the overall usability and stability of the site. Also I end up with the same engagement issues as FA, jack squat of people I enjoy chatting with.
Metatext is my ideal twitter replacement, but people still aren’t making the switch over so it maintains most of the lack of the engagement points as the other two.
And then there’s discord/telegram, my only real options to get attention. I have a whole ass server, full of a lot of the people I actually like (but unfortunately aren’t regulars so the only real members are less favorable choices) inherited from the eternally anxious but good bean
azolt, and I have done jack fuck all with any of that. I just can never bring myself to do anything with the vicious cycle of “I want to do a thing, but nobody’s here to do it with”, “nobody’s here bc I don’t do anything” ad nauseam. Even with poppin’ servers I am a mod for, I just can’t bring myself to arrange anything or invite people for things. And god forbid I actually get that praise and affection I oh so desperately desire. I can’t handle it. I tease and fantasize at arms length because I’m just so hyper sensitive that even the slightest exposure to kink talk without sexual intent make me too flustered to comfortably play along. I keep downplaying praise and I toss back and forth on the power struggle of Dom v. Sub, it keeps messing with me whether I want to be worshipped like a puppy or hand squeezing it from those beneath me, switch positions be damned. Its just too flip flopping how I want to take things.
And as far as claims of me being selective of friends in favor of big names based on what I just mentioned with the discord servers, I’ve discussed this with others but no it’s not clout chasing. I just think they’re neat dorks to hang around, I get a read on those people’s vibes a lot faster than people I see around a server and naturally want to be with people whose vibes I like, and at the end of the day they all get tossed to the side all the same like a rich kid’s toys because I find out they’re just ordinary people with dime-a-dozen social interactions I can get from anyone else so I learn to settle with those around me rather than head hunting, and the cycle just repeats.
I feel like I’m relapsing on bad, depressive habits and unmotivated mindsets that just leave me shut up and not really feeling like sharing things with others. It’s like near bipolar how these moods hit me like now. Just suddenly low energy, always wanting to sleep even when taking my meds. Also just been very iffy on commissioning which is good since I definitely could cut down on those and can be more tactical by getting more pieces with others rather than compulsively getting YCHs, but does still drain the overall motivation to coordinate with people and open artists.
This had a few tangents, but still circles back to what should I do? I know not all appreciation needs to be vocalized but still, it goes a loooooong way to getting enjoyment of out this debatably narcissistic side of the community. What would yield the best responses from people I actually enjoy talking to?
Mastodon I always describe as “Twitter if it was an MMO”. While the servers and everything are daunting to the layman, it literally is like an MMO which I know can still lose people. Your starting server helps you get a curated general feed that is (for the most part) curated based on an interest, but you can still access any account or post from anywhere else and follow accounts across servers too. Basically breaks the feed down to Following, Local server, All of Mastodon (kinda like For You but still no algo)
That’s another thing, there’s no algo so hashtagging and RT’ing are actually very heavily encouraged to reach audiences and expose others