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thoughts
2 years ago
General
You ever have a hollow feeling deep in your chest? Like your soul longs for something that your body can never reach, or maybe that thing doesn't exist outside of your mind. You fear that you're running out of time to achieve something, anything, yet you still have no motivation to do the things that your brain tells you is important or that it enjoys. Then you start to wonder if what you're feeling even matters in the grand scheme of things. It's starting to seem like it's pointless, but if that's true, why do I still have such a raw empty feeling of despair. What does it even mean? Why do I feel so uneasy, like something is slipping away from me but I don't know what. Why do I bother doing anything, what's the point of fighting against these feelings? It feels like my brain is melting, everything is jumbled together and nothing makes sense.
This is cringe, I know. Just felt like typing it, I'll probably delete tomorrow.
(edit: I didn't delete, just in case it might help someone else)
This is cringe, I know. Just felt like typing it, I'll probably delete tomorrow.
(edit: I didn't delete, just in case it might help someone else)
" You fear that you're running out of time to achieve something, anything, yet you still have no motivation to do the things that your brain tells you is important or that it enjoys"
that shit lays heavy on me every single day. it esp doesnt help being almost 30 and seeing everyone else your age have successes or feeling good with themselves and none of them feel this type of anxiety that you're feeling so you're just...trapped knowing its just you thats unsatisfied.
its even worse being so self aware about it too cause you'd think that would help you be able to DO the things you wanna do...but it doesnt. It actually kinda makes you feel worse 😫 and prolongs the suffering process.
Like i KNOW what I wanna do and how to do it...Im just so mentally ill I cant ever get up the willpower to do it. It feels like I'm swimming through thick mud just to reach the starting line, let alone make it to the finish line.
you arent alone I promise! Im sorry youre also suffering with it. I wouldnt wish it on even my worst enemies. 💔