Just writing another update post on my life so people aren't out of the loop!

So this week I actually moved back to my parents house. I was with my fiancé for a long time but eventually had to go back since I don't live with him. I booked my flight to Canada last Sunday and this week has been stressful.

I'm not super sad about it since I've done it so many times, going back and forth but I'm more disappointed. This has been the longest I've been away so ofc my parents did not maintain my 'apartment' very well. I say 'apartment' because my parents own a storefront with apartments above it and they gave me one of them instead of just a room to myself. Long story short, I basically had to run away from home to convince them to give it to me (otherwise they would just use it for hoarding/storage). Anyway, I came back to it in filthy condition and my cat in worse condition. She is okay but her fur is heavily matted, to the point where I think it might be painful to her. Plus she is overweight (she can't jump up to counters or chairs anymore). I'll have to book an appointment to get her checked once I get funds, she might have to get shaved. My hot water was also not working so we need to get someone here to fix it. My lanyard was missing that had my keys on it. I eventually found it in my parents room after them repeatedly telling me "we didn't touch it, you took it with you" and not caring. I also have back and abdominal pain and I don't know why. I hope it's not an organ issue, it's been like this for two weeks. I made a doctor's appointment but it's gonna be in three weeks. My parents told me they cleaned my apartment but the cabinets were full of roach and mice droppings and dust so I spent the whole week cleaning/disinfecting. Crime has increased a lot over the years and I see people shooting up drugs behind my house now (like ON our property) and we can't do anything about it.. I'm trying to get used to everything again but it's kind of difficult when I also have to deal with how my parents talk to me. Basically never listening to what I have to say even if it's casual and only ever talking about their shop. They begged me to come back because they were getting old and needed me to aid them but they won't even let me do anything for them or hear any advice from me.

I'm not like my dad, I'm not gonna give up on everything and just listen to my mom and accept this life but I still have to live it for now. I bottled up a lot of vents while living with my fiancé due to them being stuff I knew were gonna pass and get better. This doesn't get any better, it's been the same since I was born, the only different is that I have a safe space and more people to talk to now. That's the best it can get for now and I'm happy for that.

I keep pushing my deadlines and I'm sorry I've been so depressed and not posting much. I shouldn't be making excuses, it's not right to everyone I owe art to or follow me for content. I don't see much holding me back now but I admit, I think my view on life has drastically changed over the years. I'll try to get back to where I was in creating art and interacting with people.