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Addressing a personal issue (I’m okay!)
2 years ago
I wasn’t sure if I wanted to write about this or make it public at all, but I’d like to address the issue of my tendency to ‘ignore’ the messages, taking a while to answer them or not answer at all.
Thing is, I’ve always been sociable and open to people. And I enjoyed communicating online, it used to be a part of my everyday routine and I couldn’t imagine myself not doing it. But for the past months I came to the understanding that for the most part the constant online chatting is exhausting, as well as all the media trying to influence the way I see the world and the way the things should be done. I got to learn how to enjoy the offline life more, enjoy the company of my husband and came to the realisation that it’s more than enough to feel safe, entertained and happy. I still enjoy talking to people online, but I just can’t do that as frequently as before and I’m tired of feeling guilty, always trying to find an excuse of why it took me so long to answer. And to all of my online friends: I still love and appreciate all of you, but I’m sorry I can’t be there for you as much as you expect. If you feel like my issue stands in the way of our friendship - it’s understandable and I won’t be standing in your way. But my point is, I just can’t change this about myself and I’ll let you be the judge.
There’s also another thing I’d like to point out: the only time I’m somewhat active in social media would be posting my work and maintaining my personal tg channel. Doing commissions and YCHs is something that I enjoy, and it’s also my job. The struggle of a decision to find any other job has always been there, but I keep doing what I can do the best to draw as much as possible, and I’m going off track here once again but the main point is: me being somewhat active on social media doesn’t necessarily mean I’m always happy and ready for new conversations with new people which would be not about new project. And I feel somewhat guilty about it too, you know? But it will remain my personal issue for now.
Anyway, I just felt like it would be a right thing to address it. For some of you it might not mean anything, for others it might say something about me as a person, as a creator.
I wish you all the best, peace o/
Thing is, I’ve always been sociable and open to people. And I enjoyed communicating online, it used to be a part of my everyday routine and I couldn’t imagine myself not doing it. But for the past months I came to the understanding that for the most part the constant online chatting is exhausting, as well as all the media trying to influence the way I see the world and the way the things should be done. I got to learn how to enjoy the offline life more, enjoy the company of my husband and came to the realisation that it’s more than enough to feel safe, entertained and happy. I still enjoy talking to people online, but I just can’t do that as frequently as before and I’m tired of feeling guilty, always trying to find an excuse of why it took me so long to answer. And to all of my online friends: I still love and appreciate all of you, but I’m sorry I can’t be there for you as much as you expect. If you feel like my issue stands in the way of our friendship - it’s understandable and I won’t be standing in your way. But my point is, I just can’t change this about myself and I’ll let you be the judge.
There’s also another thing I’d like to point out: the only time I’m somewhat active in social media would be posting my work and maintaining my personal tg channel. Doing commissions and YCHs is something that I enjoy, and it’s also my job. The struggle of a decision to find any other job has always been there, but I keep doing what I can do the best to draw as much as possible, and I’m going off track here once again but the main point is: me being somewhat active on social media doesn’t necessarily mean I’m always happy and ready for new conversations with new people which would be not about new project. And I feel somewhat guilty about it too, you know? But it will remain my personal issue for now.
Anyway, I just felt like it would be a right thing to address it. For some of you it might not mean anything, for others it might say something about me as a person, as a creator.
I wish you all the best, peace o/
Take care lass <3