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Couple Things to Add
2 years ago
Howdy
First off: thank you tons for the kind words in my notes and shouts, it's been hard to read admittedly because I am terrible at taking kind words, especially so much of it. But just thank you for that, it's definitely made this past few days easier. Twitter is addictive and it's been a struggle to not open it or undo my account deactivation, but I've known for a good year and a half that this is what I want to do, your kind words and understanding have helped me so far in following this through and words cannot express my gratitude for this support. I genuinely could never have imagined receiving support from so many people at any point in my life.
I wanna clarify something really important though. It's come to my attention that the person who made the comment on Twitter has been the recipient of a big hate brigade. Please just stop and leave them alone. Yeah they said something upsetting, but I've seen people stooping just as low, if not lower in extreme cases. That's not okay. Perhaps I didn't make it clear enough but this person isn't the sole reason I've stepped away, more the straw that broke the camel's back.
Please stop putting artists like myself on such a big pedestal, it's unhealthy and I have reason to believe this has been a big contributor this big hate mob. For ages I've seen this worship of artists and it's creepy and uncomfortable, and now it's sent some people rabid on Twitter. How is that okay? I appreciate people got upset because I was so upset, but this was not the answer. I hope that anyone reading this does so with an open mind and thinks more about what this community could be going forward. We need to breathe, relax and remember we're all just people.
I want to apologise to puppyzolt, I didn't see this barrage of harassment coming. I was just upset and hoping for a clean exit from the community and that was all I could think about. I also saw your apology too and I can see it was sincere. Perhaps if some people wipe the mouth-foam from their faces, they'll see you just made a mistake and are genuinely sorry as well. I've come to learn over the years that there are a lot of people out there in this community who struggle to socialise and upon reflection I think this was one of those cases, I don't believe you knew that what you were saying was something so upsetting until the damage had been done. I do believe you feel remorseful for it and that's good.
Since this all came from talking about Creature's legacy, I want you all to think about that. Because now I've failed at multiple attempts to pay tribute to him, and now this last failed attempt of mine has completely exploded into a fireball of hatred and drama. That's not how a tribute to a kind, gentle friend should have ever concluded. I will never stop feeling responsible for it either. Please do us all a favour and pay homage to Creature by endeavouring to be more understanding towards everyone, not just the people you choose to understand.
Thank you again everyone. Please look after yourselves and make good choices <3
I wanna clarify something really important though. It's come to my attention that the person who made the comment on Twitter has been the recipient of a big hate brigade. Please just stop and leave them alone. Yeah they said something upsetting, but I've seen people stooping just as low, if not lower in extreme cases. That's not okay. Perhaps I didn't make it clear enough but this person isn't the sole reason I've stepped away, more the straw that broke the camel's back.
Please stop putting artists like myself on such a big pedestal, it's unhealthy and I have reason to believe this has been a big contributor this big hate mob. For ages I've seen this worship of artists and it's creepy and uncomfortable, and now it's sent some people rabid on Twitter. How is that okay? I appreciate people got upset because I was so upset, but this was not the answer. I hope that anyone reading this does so with an open mind and thinks more about what this community could be going forward. We need to breathe, relax and remember we're all just people.
I want to apologise to puppyzolt, I didn't see this barrage of harassment coming. I was just upset and hoping for a clean exit from the community and that was all I could think about. I also saw your apology too and I can see it was sincere. Perhaps if some people wipe the mouth-foam from their faces, they'll see you just made a mistake and are genuinely sorry as well. I've come to learn over the years that there are a lot of people out there in this community who struggle to socialise and upon reflection I think this was one of those cases, I don't believe you knew that what you were saying was something so upsetting until the damage had been done. I do believe you feel remorseful for it and that's good.
Since this all came from talking about Creature's legacy, I want you all to think about that. Because now I've failed at multiple attempts to pay tribute to him, and now this last failed attempt of mine has completely exploded into a fireball of hatred and drama. That's not how a tribute to a kind, gentle friend should have ever concluded. I will never stop feeling responsible for it either. Please do us all a favour and pay homage to Creature by endeavouring to be more understanding towards everyone, not just the people you choose to understand.
Thank you again everyone. Please look after yourselves and make good choices <3
You do what's best for you. You did a fantastic job honouring Creature with the time you had. You didn't fail! You tried making it work and in the end that's all that matters. You tried and you succeeded in doing more than most, even if it wasn't as expansive or complete as you aimed. You still did more than most, you kept his memory alive, and that's to be commended.
Take care of yourself Racc, and see you in the future if you decide to come back!
You did some good stuff and I do enjoy the shenanigans you put to your OCs
I only knew Creature for about a year. I realize I can't speak for Creature, and there were many more closer to him, but from what I knew of him, he would not have agreed about you failing at tributes. Your work on Juicy July was wonderful, as all your art is, and I'd venture he would have appreciated every bit of work you put into it. I feel he would just be grateful that you attempted his list, and kept his memory alive. I'm confident Creature would want you to be happy at the end of the day, however that looks.
And from my perspective as well, it was anything but a failure. I planned to participate in Juicy July with Creature, and had several commissions lined up for it with him. After he passed, I truly didn't see myself getting anything in that vein again. When I saw you working through his list, though, it made me so happy. It was just one more way to keep his memory alive, and it brought enjoyment back to berry stuff again for me. So, personally, thank you for the work you did.
I wish you nothing but the best, Racc. I've never talked to ya but our circles overlap a bit, and I've heard nothing but great things about you from people I know and trust. Should you ever decide to come back, I'm sure myself and many others will be waiting with open arms. If not? I hope life treats you well. Regardless of the future, thank you for making the community better while you were here.
i won't go into details but i've been the target of a group of people who feel i've disrespected him despite my reasons due to having a less than ideal relationship with him. i dunno what happened but upon his passing they seem hellbent on bringing up and reviving ancient spats from years ago which is uncomfortable when one of the two people in said spat isn't, well, with us anymore. :/
i sometimes wonder how many of them were actually friends with him and how many are just using it as an excuse to attack and harass others.
it's bad and i'm sorry they (or a similar group of people) are doing that to you, too.
All-in-all, your attempt means so much more that you tried, and honestly, it's not ruining ANYONE's memory by doing or not doing the theme this month. It was just nice that you did what you could until you had to work on yourself.
If you think this new start with your career will pay the bills then definitely stop the commissions if that would help you. You don't owe anyone anything.
But if you still like drawing, then personally, work on it whenever you feel like with the ideas you've always wanted to see without needing to submit yourself to others' ideas just to pay the bills.
In the end, it'd be nice if you stayed and did post the stuff you felt comfortable with submitting, without worry of needing to satisfy anyone. But after everything, I would not blame you for still leaving. The pedestal metaphor is right on the money. <3
You've done great stuff with the July list and in general. I've appreciated getting to know you and only regret not doing so sooner.
You've made some good points. This fandom has a problem with mobbing, and it's not how things should be going, especially considering the cause was a tribute to a dear friend.
Stay safe and do your best out there, Racc. Wishing you well <3
I do wanna say thank you so much for bringing up the point about people putting artists/anyone popular on a pedestal, because that was and still is very much needed to be brought up, especially in this community where it's so unbelievably frequent. I know you and I have had firsthand experience with "you know who" doing it in our circle of friends, but I still very much am thankful you brought this up here. Would've much rather said the thank you in DMs, but I wanna make sure you're being given the space and don't wanna take much time away from you when you should be taking time away from all of this.
Be sure to get plenty of rest, thanks once again for bringing that important point up, and always remember this, you is a beautiful and stinky bonch <3 :3
I'll miss you. Hope you take care of yourself
Cuz as you say, you'd already been going thru complications in life. Zolt was just the one to nudge you to finally put a stop to burning yourself out
So, while not in the most orthodox of ways, he did you a favor in the long run, no?