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Feeling frustrated an dumb
2 years ago
Just kinda a blow off steam post
(so please feel free to skip, just me yelling into the internet void xP)
because a lot of the people I had been wanting to talk to about stuff turned out needed my help as a source of strength and person to lean on so had to keep me own dumb frustrations and sadness inside and buried and now feeling just a tad dumb….
Like put on a far to convincing brave face and now just sitting and stressing and yelling on the inside and can’t really show it because than other people around me’s armor might come down
My commission based pay at me day job screwed me
Bills be screwing me
Debt be screwing me
The fact September is the birth month of both my dad and grandfather who passed away last year as well as my boyfriends birthday month is screwing with me (just roller coaster of sad and happy
Just want like one thing I feel I can handle and accomplish but everything I gotta do requires effort and work that I don’t feel I got in me….
Saying all this though
Do feel a bit better getting it out of me brain and into space. I know I have friends here who’d be willing to talk and thank ya if ya read this far and are like “why didn’t ya just message me”
Well I’m dumb and lazy and a natural introvert so doing healthy social types things is hisssssss XP XD
But much love and thank you for the thought and fact that I know I could/can rely on ya
Again again ( XD) not a lot of point to this post other than to let out some steam and get me head on a bit straighter.
Last side note:
(so please feel free to skip, just me yelling into the internet void xP)
because a lot of the people I had been wanting to talk to about stuff turned out needed my help as a source of strength and person to lean on so had to keep me own dumb frustrations and sadness inside and buried and now feeling just a tad dumb….
Like put on a far to convincing brave face and now just sitting and stressing and yelling on the inside and can’t really show it because than other people around me’s armor might come down
My commission based pay at me day job screwed me
Bills be screwing me
Debt be screwing me
The fact September is the birth month of both my dad and grandfather who passed away last year as well as my boyfriends birthday month is screwing with me (just roller coaster of sad and happy
Just want like one thing I feel I can handle and accomplish but everything I gotta do requires effort and work that I don’t feel I got in me….
Saying all this though
Do feel a bit better getting it out of me brain and into space. I know I have friends here who’d be willing to talk and thank ya if ya read this far and are like “why didn’t ya just message me”
Well I’m dumb and lazy and a natural introvert so doing healthy social types things is hisssssss XP XD
But much love and thank you for the thought and fact that I know I could/can rely on ya
Again again ( XD) not a lot of point to this post other than to let out some steam and get me head on a bit straighter.
Last side note:
Whatastandupguy
~whatastandupguy
Aww dude, I know how that feels, life is overwhelming and it feels like you can’t tell anyone about it. Honestly dude, I’d be happy to listen to ya vent, anything I can to help!
