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hello. we need to talk.
2 years ago
i don't know how to start this because i've never talked about it publicly. I don't know if I feel more shame or fear but.. uh.. alright..
i was in this state for quite awhile, it feels like weeks, maybe months or even years but i couldn't accept it.
every day became a routine, everything has lost its point and sense. i always say to myself: its okay! things happen! just keep moving!
and i was trying, i really tried my best to keep things in shape. slowly i started to loose any interest to actually everything, i was trying something new and it always was a disappointment. i dont have irl friends and i dont really chat to anyone in social media. i tried to make new friends but i always was losing interest.
what it that? i asked myself. ah, that's nothing, it will go away.
i thought.
i thought that until the moment i started barely sleep, barely eat. any small issue felt like the world is going to crash and only i am to blame.
i cant work. i cant do anything because i lost the meaning, why even trying when your life has no point..
i visited therapist. i couldn't accept it. depression it is.. my doctor helped me, she opened my eyes even tho i still feel very down. i need to do a ton of work on myself but it will be fine.. i always say so..
and this is the part when i ask your help.
my therapist put me on a regimen of meds.. i spent a lot on doctors' visits.. im broke.. my friend helped me with funds for meds and food but i feel like i need to do this..you know.. financial cushion.. so will try to do a queue..for October..
maybe i will try to do some ychs for Halloween.. i dont know.. im lost..
im sorry for all this.. i feel terrible even talking about it.
if you want to help, please contact me on discord (freddymartin), but if you just want to help here is my boosty link.. https://boosty.to/freddymartin
im really sorry for all this.. and thank you so much for reading.. :<
i was in this state for quite awhile, it feels like weeks, maybe months or even years but i couldn't accept it.
every day became a routine, everything has lost its point and sense. i always say to myself: its okay! things happen! just keep moving!
and i was trying, i really tried my best to keep things in shape. slowly i started to loose any interest to actually everything, i was trying something new and it always was a disappointment. i dont have irl friends and i dont really chat to anyone in social media. i tried to make new friends but i always was losing interest.
what it that? i asked myself. ah, that's nothing, it will go away.
i thought.
i thought that until the moment i started barely sleep, barely eat. any small issue felt like the world is going to crash and only i am to blame.
i cant work. i cant do anything because i lost the meaning, why even trying when your life has no point..
i visited therapist. i couldn't accept it. depression it is.. my doctor helped me, she opened my eyes even tho i still feel very down. i need to do a ton of work on myself but it will be fine.. i always say so..
and this is the part when i ask your help.
my therapist put me on a regimen of meds.. i spent a lot on doctors' visits.. im broke.. my friend helped me with funds for meds and food but i feel like i need to do this..you know.. financial cushion.. so will try to do a queue..for October..
maybe i will try to do some ychs for Halloween.. i dont know.. im lost..
im sorry for all this.. i feel terrible even talking about it.
if you want to help, please contact me on discord (freddymartin), but if you just want to help here is my boosty link.. https://boosty.to/freddymartin
im really sorry for all this.. and thank you so much for reading.. :<
It's okay. You'll be okay!
You do not need to apologize for being a person with emotions. Please please please take some time to step back and improve your mental well being.
Creating art is an incredible mental drain. Let your mind have some time to refill!
Although we’ve only spoken for a small amount, and you may not think it, but I know you can overcome this depression and find ways to break through the dark fog. Things maybe be small now, but I have hopes they’ll clear up.