its an ideology they follow that is a cult, and anyone that rejects the ideology nd cult must have ties cut off from or they may be drawn back from the cult and ideology.

I had a friend that was like this. They would always talk about the things they had suffered through, the people that had abandoned them, and how terrible they felt daily, and I felt sympathy for them, because I too had been through a lot of grief, and knew how it felt. I'd try my best to spend quality time with them, to make them feel better and cared for even at my own expense, but after a while, it just wasn't enough. Now I'm here, with them having blocked me for what may well be the 5th and final time or so after an around 4 year long friendship, realizing that they were abusing and manipulating me throughout a large portion of it, but I never saw it, because my care for them blinded me.
I can only speculate about why exactly they did the things they did, and I'll never know the truth, but I see a lot of similarity between what you mentioned and my own experience when it comes to people pushing away help. It definitely hurts not being able to help a good friend, but the thing is, you can't help them if they don't want to help themselves, and trying to put in your all to help them will only make it hurt more when they end up rejecting you and others around them. Sometimes, it's best to just let go, before you get brought down too. Remember the good times, but also remember the bad, and put your care into the people who appreciate you just as much as you appreciate them.

Wow.. thank you for your insight. I'm sorry they put you through such a constant uphill battle and didn't even give you the appreciation you deserved after it all. Relationships like this can be so miserable and exhausting..
I hope their pain can fade from your mind just as I hope the same for myself. I've been feeling so worn out lately that I'm very little on patience with people who cut themselves off. I let them go and don't put in so much effort trying to yank them out of the hole they keep digging deeper. Just hoping they will stop. Maybe one day someone will.

I've been both sides of that mess. I'm pretty much unhelpable in many ways (emotionally and sexually) and helpful in many others. I gave up on deep internet relationships, its just this level of fantasy that sugar coats things that would normally turn you off from people and also makes you act like someone you're possibly not until shit gets real. I've lost a fair deal of my 20s to talking to people who didn't deserve my time and to others that I didn't deserve who tried to help me.

I figure they become despondent or hopeless. It's pretty common these days

I am miserable. Sometimes people wants to help me. But in some cases they truly can't. And i'm personally don't want to make them sad and feel as helpless as i am. I don't want to make my friends feel the fail, feel weakness. Sometimes it's just impossible to help, and if they continue their tries, sometimes i'm making a difficult decision to stop communicating with them. I just don't want to drown others with myself. That's my personal reason, other people may have different...