Yet Another Random Question
2 years ago
Listen up, savior!
Hello! As usual, I am making a journal because I'm curious about something. Of all my work, even including the short form stuff from back with Error, what would you say is my absolute best?
It can be anything, as long as it's something I did. So don't choose a hot piece of art, since I don't make those. Any piece of writing I've made. I want to see what is considered my best work, so I can try to focus on improving through that.
Thanks in advance!
It can be anything, as long as it's something I did. So don't choose a hot piece of art, since I don't make those. Any piece of writing I've made. I want to see what is considered my best work, so I can try to focus on improving through that.
Thanks in advance!
In terms of getting off... The party, because it's a bit more succinct, but in the best possible way of it not dallying too long in any spot.
But I can tell it isn't garbage, as even when looking at other stories I really enjoyed with gassy Eeveelutions, this one is still one of my top favorites, easily top 3. I'm going to give a few examples from this story about stuff I enjoyed, as while a lot of it is cause of the Eeveelutions, other parts could still be useful for showing why I enjoyed it so much.
Even before getting to the main event, the various personalities of the Eeveelutions were fun to see. Each one felt uniquely different, even the Sylveon. The competitiveness between Lucas and Mason, combined with Warren's more calm personality compared to them was a pretty cute combination that helped enhance the events that went down later. While the Sylveon hosting the contest didn't exactly choose the best representations for it, their personalities played off each other very well. Because of this I often find myself rereading the first half of the story before the gas enters the picture.
Once the gas did enter the picture, I liked the difference in how the farts were for them all. Warren's more crackly farts with burnt and smoky scents, Lucas' more bubbly, fishy fumes, Mason's noisy, bassy yet scentless braps, they each felt fitting to each Eeveelution (and especially for Mason) and stood out.
And then we reach my favorite part, when Lucas ends up pinning Mason down and smothering the Jolteon in his ass. Nearly every comment that Lucas made at this point was very enjoyable, and the details, like him giving a bit of a wiggle as he sat upon his cushion to jam the smaller Jolteon's face right against his tailhole, the gurgle that could be heard from Lucas' midsection right before the fart came, details like how only the tips of Mason's ears could be seen beneath the thick bubble-butt that Lucas had, all this made the story so much better. And the description of both the long fart, as well as the smell were really good. Combine that with Lucas being even more mischievous and grinding his butt on the poor Jolt's face a bit more, not getting up until he had fully passed out from the stench, made this part one of my favorites from any story I've read.
Then the next part, while it makes me feel bad for Warren, was also really nice. Warren knowing he's lost at this point and threatening to burn the Vaporeon's ass if he brought it anywhere near him was an interesting touch that fit scene and character so well, and made Lucas have to come up with another plan, and the one he came up with was quite clever. Purposefully taking exaggerated stomps towards Warren to mix up all the contents in his stomach was such a clever idea that worked out for him and got him the win as he ripped his worst fart yet.
While slightly disappointing that this was the only part we got, it was still a whole ton of fun, and I absolutely adored this story so much. The characters and their personalities, as well as the way they played off each other, and the descriptions of the farts and the actions each eon took helped make this one of my absolute favorites out there by far.
Meant to say this in the first post but forgot until now; I will say that, as far as I can tell at least, your writing is already really great based on some more recent stories I've read every now and then. I look forward to seeing how you manage to improve your writing, considering how good it already is!
Meant to put that in the original message, and just forgot for a few minutes, sorry about that