Ok ... so where to start ...

I thought I was in burn-out 6 years ago and that I experienced it before ... turns out I didn't ?

I am now in an actual physical and mental burnout, I couldn't even imagine how awfull of a feeling it is. I have been for a month and a half actually, work can NOT leave my mind, money can NOT leave my mind, I feel like if I let go of it for just a month I will loose everything that I have.

I am feeling restless, my sleep are no longer repairing even with my CPAP, my body hurts when I wake up and my memory is very impaired I can't remember crap of what I have to do, I need to check details of stuff every 5 minutes (this has been going on for a couple of month already.) my work flow is terribly slow and can't even draw for myself, I randomly cry for no reason, I am irritable, I isolate myself, I cannot focus on anything, my mind just goes somewhere everytime I try to focus down I just space out, I am incredibly stressed out cause I don't have alot of money to fall back on in that kind of situation.

So while I have one commission in the making that will be done slowly, it's a sketch I should be able to finish it.

I will put myself in sick leave and figure something out, I cannot keep pushing or I will most likely kill myself slowly, I will take a whole month without thinking about work after I'm done my current commission and after I come back, I will have to make some changes in the way I approach work otherwise I will be jumping in another burn out.

I'm sorry my content and presence have be a disaster lately, I haven't been able to entertain as much as I would like to, but I can't just keep ignoring my body. I just can't.

If I come back sooner that's good, if not well ... It means I'm still struggling. But let's hope I will atleast be able to draw for myself in that short time.

Thank you for your understanding, and take good care of yourselves.