Roadtrip Journal - Home! #1
a year ago
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I’ve returned!
It’s been about 25 days out on the road but I am finally home. I traveled across 7 states and many different ecological boundaries in a journey to visit strangers, friends, and family. I did manage to find artists to interview for my oral history ethnography project, and while I wished I could have done more I realized I needed to focus on my family while I was there in the flesh. For someone whose only experience is volunteer radio, communications studies, and extreme conversationalist, I thought I did pretty well on a self-organized project like this. Of course there will be some obvious mistakes and hidden tricks I’ll stumble over during the process. I still have recordings to go over, paperwork to sign, more paperwork to send, emails to send, and follow-ups to do. Don’t worry, I have not forgotten.
During the trip, I slid into a mental state of mind where I was letting myself linger with the people who mattered to me, prioritizing listening without intention over recording. Deciding whether to let a thought be without holding on to it or to pursue it further, I mused to myself instead of rigorously journaling and documenting my thought process. I had tried and experimented many attempts at harnessing my inner writer, so telling myself it was fine to let go, that this was a casual trip, was profound for me. I got to create my own pressure for my own needs and desires and practiced telling myself things were important to me simply because I felt that way, no justification needed. It was time spent away from home and it was worth it; lingering one or two days longer than planned at family you rarely see is a beautiful excuse for simple pleasures, especially during a car camping road trip.
I realized I had not seen my family out of state in many many years, and I needed to visit them. Why not? I took a lazy coastline down Oregon and played around with not using my map for a while. I spent a night in the Tillamook forest at a dispersed campsite all to myself where I ended up re-parking further into the woods to get even cozier.
This was the part of the trip where I got to spend a couple nights and 1 whole day naked in the woods with nobody around, just reading books, drawing, walking, eating, and sleeping. This comes highly recommended. Do not overlook an opportunity to spend a day doing nothing in any trip planning you may do. I knew I was going to fill my time with meeting people, listening to them, and having heartfelt experiences, so I let my proverbial hair down. Continuing south, the next night was spent up on some logging roads on a 3-way dirt interchange next to some locked gates, which was nice and out of the way for some decent sleep. Eventually I made it to one of the many Riverside towns and convinced an RV park to sell me a spot for the night in my “pop-out camper”.
After a few days of anxiety building I was relieved at having a secure place to sleep, even if I was bummed out about it. Camping with tents is now suspicious because people think you are homeless unless you look like a perfect suburban family, a rich outdoor enthusiast, or have a trailer. I’m all ready to go camping c.2010, before the pandemic, before cryptocurrency, before apps outranked websites. The melancholy I have about it is unresolvable right now.
My grandfather is in northern California, now quite old, and living with Parkinson's. One of the most intelligent and accomplished people in his time, he lives his days trying not to sleep too much in his chair while his caretakers do their thing. Linda manages all she can, and keeps a fire advocating for his comfort and health. Uncle Bruce is up helping every other week, staying overnight for weeks at a time to assist, doing more than what many people I know would do for their own parents. As I normally do, I wandered around the grounds and closets and buildings looking at all the projects and collections, asking about their stories. We had wonderful dinners, days of taking it easy (as easy as you can when you’ve got Parkinson’s), and time catching up with the last few years. For all the wonderful baths I took and walks on which I strolled, I was reminded about my own human trajectory, about how natural it is to both be growing and falling apart at the same time, about who would be with me when either one of us suddenly changed into someone who could no longer take care of ourselves. It snowed right as I got to the address, and it only let up on the final day or so. I had never seen snow in those mountains, we had always come to visit in summer. After visiting grandpa, I followed Bruce on a 9 hour drive through the state back to his and Leo’s house down south. Gas is so expensive in California yet people drive like it burns holes in their pockets.
The time spent with my aunt and uncle was relieving and energizing, giving us space to be ourselves after caring for our older generation. Of course the weather turns cold when I visit, but cold for south California was warm for me. Hanging out in the garage while Bruce works on a project, reading books recommended by Leo, I spent my time sitting in the back with the lemon tree and sun chairs and hummingbirds. Together we caught up by bitching to each other about work, bitching to each other about politics, sharing music, and recounting tales. There are always things to catch up on, things to learn, and unknown perspectives with family visits that contrast with the complicated feeling of “being out-of-touch” I have. We need more family movie nights, because I am terrible at picking movies but will watch them over dinner. I miss you already! Pet Felix for me! After a few days and in a sad response to constant “you can stay for as long as you like” reminders, I left towards Colorado to visit my sister.
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For pictures, read on my personal website journal entry: https://mikamonsterstudio.wordpress.....om-roadtrip-1/
It’s been about 25 days out on the road but I am finally home. I traveled across 7 states and many different ecological boundaries in a journey to visit strangers, friends, and family. I did manage to find artists to interview for my oral history ethnography project, and while I wished I could have done more I realized I needed to focus on my family while I was there in the flesh. For someone whose only experience is volunteer radio, communications studies, and extreme conversationalist, I thought I did pretty well on a self-organized project like this. Of course there will be some obvious mistakes and hidden tricks I’ll stumble over during the process. I still have recordings to go over, paperwork to sign, more paperwork to send, emails to send, and follow-ups to do. Don’t worry, I have not forgotten.
During the trip, I slid into a mental state of mind where I was letting myself linger with the people who mattered to me, prioritizing listening without intention over recording. Deciding whether to let a thought be without holding on to it or to pursue it further, I mused to myself instead of rigorously journaling and documenting my thought process. I had tried and experimented many attempts at harnessing my inner writer, so telling myself it was fine to let go, that this was a casual trip, was profound for me. I got to create my own pressure for my own needs and desires and practiced telling myself things were important to me simply because I felt that way, no justification needed. It was time spent away from home and it was worth it; lingering one or two days longer than planned at family you rarely see is a beautiful excuse for simple pleasures, especially during a car camping road trip.
I realized I had not seen my family out of state in many many years, and I needed to visit them. Why not? I took a lazy coastline down Oregon and played around with not using my map for a while. I spent a night in the Tillamook forest at a dispersed campsite all to myself where I ended up re-parking further into the woods to get even cozier.
This was the part of the trip where I got to spend a couple nights and 1 whole day naked in the woods with nobody around, just reading books, drawing, walking, eating, and sleeping. This comes highly recommended. Do not overlook an opportunity to spend a day doing nothing in any trip planning you may do. I knew I was going to fill my time with meeting people, listening to them, and having heartfelt experiences, so I let my proverbial hair down. Continuing south, the next night was spent up on some logging roads on a 3-way dirt interchange next to some locked gates, which was nice and out of the way for some decent sleep. Eventually I made it to one of the many Riverside towns and convinced an RV park to sell me a spot for the night in my “pop-out camper”.
After a few days of anxiety building I was relieved at having a secure place to sleep, even if I was bummed out about it. Camping with tents is now suspicious because people think you are homeless unless you look like a perfect suburban family, a rich outdoor enthusiast, or have a trailer. I’m all ready to go camping c.2010, before the pandemic, before cryptocurrency, before apps outranked websites. The melancholy I have about it is unresolvable right now.
My grandfather is in northern California, now quite old, and living with Parkinson's. One of the most intelligent and accomplished people in his time, he lives his days trying not to sleep too much in his chair while his caretakers do their thing. Linda manages all she can, and keeps a fire advocating for his comfort and health. Uncle Bruce is up helping every other week, staying overnight for weeks at a time to assist, doing more than what many people I know would do for their own parents. As I normally do, I wandered around the grounds and closets and buildings looking at all the projects and collections, asking about their stories. We had wonderful dinners, days of taking it easy (as easy as you can when you’ve got Parkinson’s), and time catching up with the last few years. For all the wonderful baths I took and walks on which I strolled, I was reminded about my own human trajectory, about how natural it is to both be growing and falling apart at the same time, about who would be with me when either one of us suddenly changed into someone who could no longer take care of ourselves. It snowed right as I got to the address, and it only let up on the final day or so. I had never seen snow in those mountains, we had always come to visit in summer. After visiting grandpa, I followed Bruce on a 9 hour drive through the state back to his and Leo’s house down south. Gas is so expensive in California yet people drive like it burns holes in their pockets.
The time spent with my aunt and uncle was relieving and energizing, giving us space to be ourselves after caring for our older generation. Of course the weather turns cold when I visit, but cold for south California was warm for me. Hanging out in the garage while Bruce works on a project, reading books recommended by Leo, I spent my time sitting in the back with the lemon tree and sun chairs and hummingbirds. Together we caught up by bitching to each other about work, bitching to each other about politics, sharing music, and recounting tales. There are always things to catch up on, things to learn, and unknown perspectives with family visits that contrast with the complicated feeling of “being out-of-touch” I have. We need more family movie nights, because I am terrible at picking movies but will watch them over dinner. I miss you already! Pet Felix for me! After a few days and in a sad response to constant “you can stay for as long as you like” reminders, I left towards Colorado to visit my sister.
-
For pictures, read on my personal website journal entry: https://mikamonsterstudio.wordpress.....om-roadtrip-1/