Hello there. It's difficult for me to start this properly so I'm just going to go for it.

I am no longer a "Macro Artist". Okay maybe thats a little bit of a stretch, I'll still be drawing it I guess, and i'm still calling myself a "Sizeplay Artist". But as of now, I do not want to be associated with the furry side of the macro community or called a Macro Artist. This decision is really difficult so please read it and like, you can still get macro art from me if you fall under certain criteria. I'd appreicate you reading all of this if you're still interested in commissioning size stuff from me, as this is something I'm sure I'm not alone in. If you do not share these sentiments it's fine, just please respect my observations and stance on the matter. I'm not going to specify people in events I talk about, nor am I singling anyone out yeah?

"Macro" in this journal refers to size difference that is more than 1:6 in the context of the biggest and smallest subjects. The biggest is at least twice the size of an average person. Macro also refers to subject matters that tend to tower over cities, to which I will also call "City Macro". these may not be the proper terms, but they're more like landmarks to give a vauge idea what i'm talking about.

I don't hate the Macro community, far from it. However as I've said for months at this point on multiple different avenues, my relationship to it is very complicated.

Since last November, I've been grappling with my identity as an artist and person due to my past involvement in the macro fandom to create art for my abuser. It's been 7 years since I last had contact with him, but I still struggle with the lingering effects. Despite his absence, the 7 year milestone had caused me to confront these unresolved issues. Unfortunately, I have been unsuccessful in shaking the resentment I have for the macrofurry community at large, particularly the cis-gay (M/M) sector. This resentment comes from them instilling poor kink practices in me that took years to unlearn. As an AFAB transmasc individual predominantly attracted to cis men (Marsic), I have also experienced unique mistreatment that has caused lasting trauma. Despite support from friends in the macro community, I have always felt like an outsider despite having it as a kink.

Even without the buzzwords, there was a lot of stuff other macros told me “no one would like” that I never bothered trying. Role reversal, sub macro, stuff like that. While I won’t be going in that direction, I want to mention I have the impression that this sector of the macro community really, really doesn't like vagina, even seeing it. This is much in line with what I've seen from cisgay men in the LGBT community while growing up, and it ingrained a deep sense of feeling fundamentally unlovable and broken.

A fair amount of the relevant treatment i've endured in this fandom I do consider adjacent to sexual harassment and transphobia, but I will not be accusing anyone specific of anything. At this point it's been consistent enough where I felt the need to hide my AGAB and refuse to draw my character without a penis for years. I indicated my trans identity sure, but I never really mentioned it nor accurately represented myself in my art.

This is something that I only had a passing thought that might be the reason, at least until I went to Sizecon last year. I never felt more welcome and at home than the wider sizeplay community! So when I had returned, wanting to try new stuff, I was quickly reminded why I felt resentment by just... passively observing my home section of the community again.

I wanted to ignore how I felt since I was "clearly the outsider”, so I pressed onwards until I burnt myself out hard. Multiple IRL romosex developments later and I've found myself learning more things about myself every day that I'd forgotten were a part of my story. , My partner, has helped me reconnect with all of these parts of me I had forgotten were even there. Like:

Did you guys know I’m a singer and a (novice) musician?

Did you guys know I used to write erotica and that visual art was originally intended to be a back up if writing didn't pan out?

Did you guys know I used to (and still do) use omegaverse to cope with my body dysphoria?

Did you guys know that I indulged in sizeplay through being a monsterfucker, and i probably would have ended up here anyways based on my interests before my abuser?

In truth, I simply just don’t vibe with *Macro* as much as i used to. I will still finish Growtober AND Poketober when I get the chance, but I need to make it clear that I am going to be very selective on "City Macro" related art in the future, doing almost none going forward.

Stuff I’m making a priority:

My Genderfluidity

Pet / Pup Play

Salmacian rep

Omegaverse or A/B/O (Themes of impregnation included)

Norm/Micro (what i call “Domestic Macro”, but generally more micro focused)

Less extreme size diff and less extreme scales

Terra+

Underwear

BDSM

“Heatmap fur” (my new fursona, Penn)

Sex/Penetration/Intercourse of most configurations (nothing out there like ear sex or whatever)

Maybe minigames tied to discounts for my services? iunno :s

As for Penn, my new fursona, I will be making their thermochromatic fur a Patreon exclusive for the most part!! I think it's a great way to show more than just what the picture is telling us as the viewer.

So why this change?
Well, I see it as reconnecting with myself and my actual kinks, especially ones I rediscovered very recently.

I have mixed feelings about fully pivoting from sizeplay in my art. Despite still being interested in it and actully having it as a kink, I struggle with how D/s dynamics are portrayed in the Macrofurry community. It feels like i'd be rewarding the poor behavior by drawing it indiscriminately, and it's disheartening to see people gloss over transphobia and celebrate bigotry from their peers because they get/draw hot artwork. I have even been pressured by some former acquaintances to agree with these transphobic actions in private conversations, leading to very uncomfortable situations on my end.

Macrofurry is a unique kink community that has extreme dehumanization and boundary breaking, with a lack of respect for individual preferences built into the feedback loop. As a shifter, I have found the pressure to fulfill others' fantasies overwhelming and have inadvertently distanced myself from the community over time due to this discomfort. In my opinion, the intensity of Macrofurry 's boundary ignoring can exceed even what I experienced in my very brief stint in the Diaperfur community, which in the past has caused me to abandon "Leozedi" as a venture as well as the wider Diaperfur community due to my boundaries being ignored.

I also used to (E)RP as a hobby before i joined this fandom, and now I do not based on my experiences in this fandom. Even put in a Macro role, it did not matter, as the attitude was the same: the expectation for you to fit someone else's tastes and perform for them.

Make no mistake, I am not needlessly shitting on the macro community. Meeting all of you amazing people has led me to enjoy more sizeplay and openly discuss my preferences, making me more of a macrophile as a result.

However, embracing my Sub/Bottom side comes with vulnerability. At this point I have the impression that the macro community would not respect my more conservative boundaries that go against the community’s established flow. In other words, my personal boundaries do not fit with the community's behavior, and being treated as such does make me very uncomfortable. I simply do not like being picked up and "used" by strangers. I don’t really like how prevalent macros “casually” are just larger without any discussion (Eg. someone i have not met before coming up to me and saying stuff like “<looks at you on my snout> Hey there lil guy! ^-^”). The casual approach to size play and assertion of my size without discussion beforehand makes me uncomfortable, as size is often conflated with dominance and in-scene play. It doesn't matter if I'm put into a macro/dom role either: I like to choose, even if i choose the same thing most of the time. This kind of play can feel violating to me and give off a negative first impression, especially in business interactions.

However, I cannot simply keep going as i am, ignoring the majority of my kink preferences just to keep up appearances. This time was an entire year hiatus, and every time I burn out that time seems to get longer.

My proposed solution is simply that: to hone in on what i draw and keep to what I like.

What about commissions?

Honestly? this section is what made writing this entire thing so difficult and made me put it off for months. It's hard to explain how commissions of sizeplay will work now, but on my side, evaluation is simple.

for now, these are the changes:

Macro (+city setting) is no longer a topic I will accept from a client who has not approached me about it before, or if i do not know you. I may even decline on other flagship ideas even if the setting is not a metro or settlement.

I will periodically make Macro ychs; that is how you get added to the list of people I accept it from. I will let you know if you are permitted to ask upon completion of your order.

Previous clients are not affected, though i may still refuse based on saturation. In addition, If I've interacted with you before in any capacity (in other words if I am able to recognise you), that gives you the greenlight to ask!

If you want Penn, they are BIGENITAL ONLY for you. This may be lifted if i get more comfortable with all aspects of my fluidity, but I draw them how I want for your commission (but you can sway me with a really good idea, though it is till my choice).

Rampage or major damage is Mythic+ (Deluxe) only for now.

Going forward, I must recognize you enough to get a feel on how you conduct yourself in order to commission Macro. I'm not making judgements on personal character of course, I'm just not feeling the whole "no restrictions" thing anymore.

Maybe I can have a form were you submit up to three ideas for commissions? I'm not really worried about that right now, I have a queue to clear.

What about your genderfluidity?

Aha. you see.

So, socially/IRL I do consider myself masculine (more like femme-masc) and dress as such. But in the bedroom, I am very fluid. So, in key pieces with specific people, Penn may be treated differently. I will be way more blunt on the post body attached to any eligeable image, and seeing Penn be called a “good girl” or other female signifiers does not give you the permission to call them (nor me) such. The potential subject matters arent exactly misgendering, per se, but it’s about context and consent. These instances will largely be personal or commissioned by a specific person, and that person is the only one allowed to use those honorifics without restriction. Ergo, it is misgendering for an outsider of my relationship to attempt to call me such based on his responses.

This is a warning to other trans people (specifically AFAB bodied people) that some subject matter, while consensual for me, may rub you the wrong way or trigger misgendering trauma. While it’s not intended to be taken that way (nor am i fetishizing misgendering and bigotry), I completely understand if it makes you (this group) uncomfortable. I take no offense if you have to unfollow or block me, please do what makes you feel safe and comfortable.

This is also a warning to cishet people: My art is NOT cishet. You may like it, you may find it hot, but if your vibes make me feel icky (eg, I am under the impression you only liked it because Penn's body has tits and vag and the other person 's character is male) I may block you. You have a seat at this table like everyone else here, just please remember whose roof you’re under. I'm a queer furry artist that fucks with gender, I'm not a Straighty mc Straighterson.

If you are a sex repulsed ace, this is your warning! I will be drawing more sexual acts, specifically intercourse. Please take care, and please unfollow if it does not vibe with you! My art is not worth your discomfort and as a fellow ace person, i completely understand <3 Please take care of yourself okay?

From now on, please consider me a SizePlay Artist. I don't just do macro, and I really don't want to be considered such anymore. Thank you for reading and please note me if you have any questions or concerns.