Hey hey all. These past few months haven’t been great for me. My depression has essentially been kicked into overdrive, making me worry about tiny little things that arguably don’t matter like friends not following me on other social media sites and what not. Doesn’t help that basically every day I’ve been thinking about dying in various ways. It doesn’t even phase me at this point, it used to make me tear up but now, when I think about dying I just feel nothing. To continue with the thing that doesn’t matter that I’m worried about, it’s made me especially anxious because now I’m convinced a lot of my friends that I haven’t talked to in months or years don’t like me anymore and don’t want to be friends with me. If it’s any consolation to those who do line up with my brains insane worries, I still think we’re friends, even if we haven’t talked in a long long time. You’ll always be my friend, and I love you for that. On a different note that has most definitely contributed to my extreme lows of depression, the election results and 2025. I do not look forward to next year or really the next four years, but apparently the right wing is doing a lot of infighting right now because surprise surprise the people that make their fortunes using unpaid immigrant or slave labor need slaves and unpaid immigrants to do their work. So hey there’s that I guess. It probably won’t lead anywhere, like everything else. I’ve said before on my Twitter and bluesky that there is nothing to look forward to and I have no future. Mostly as vent posts but also a truth to an extent. I have nothing really to look forward to, and what I do look forward to either has had one piece of info drop and nothing else, or is releasing in 20-get fucked. Yippee for me. I’m usually optimistic about most things but, just not anything at all recently in all honesty. So yeah that’s what’s been going on in my brain recently. I hope new years in general is fine at the very least, maybe I’ll get to do something fun, I dunno. I don’t look forward to next year. Thanks for reading.