Okay, I'm likely not your target for this as I am neither: A). A mom, or B). A woman with a uterus, but based on everything I've seen there are multiple reasons why someone would want to do it naturally.

One of those is concern over the drugs affecting the baby. Granted I believe by the time an epidural is administered it'd take too long for a parent's metabolism to process it and have any real effect on the baby, but some people just really do not want to have the chemicals involved at all.

Additionally, for some people it's a matter of personal pride. Some people simply want to do a natural birth either because they just want it that way, or because it's a tradition to not use drugs to aid the process. You see this also with homebirths as well, some people simply prefer birth the natural way, despite the pain. Granted I also don't understand that entirely as if I could get pregnant I would absolutely get an epidural lol.

And lastly for me, some times it's just way too late to administer an epidural. I remember being told for either mine or my sibling's birth my mother was too far into the process to get an epidural and just had to deal with it (almost certainly it was my sibling's as she did not have any kids after that lol).

Now I know I'm not your target with this, but I do have part of a perspective that might be helpful for this. I'm a trans woman, and I'm somebody who would want to experience menstruation because despite how painful it is, it's something very feminine, and to me shows strength to go through. It's definitely not something everyone would choose, but I know if I could I would. Some people simply want to face the pain because they believe that makes them stronger. Different people will feel differently about it and I think in the modern day most pregnant people are choosing epidural if they can help it because of the convenience and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that!

As for the discussion on complications... I'm entirely ill equipped to answer that personally as I don't have experience with that whatsoever.

As a rule of thumb, a lot of the kink space surround pregnancy and birth is kinda inherently objectifying by its very nature. People can definitely try to spin it in a way to be empowering, but tbh I think no matter how much justice you try to do it, if it's within the kink space it's gonna be a little objectifying. My own personal feelings on this are that objectification can be bad if you're incapable of compartmentalizing it, but as long as you're at least trying to be respectful it's better than nothing.

Basically, imo: if you're gonna try it, at least make an effort to approach it respectfully.

I’m not a mom, however my mother had an unmedicated birth because she was driven to the hospital too late and had to rush it without any time for an epidural. So that’s one reason 😅

I know an hippie mom on tiktok who did unmediated home birth for both her children because it’s the way people have done it for a long time, and she wants to feel all the pain of the birth process. Sort of a prideful “nature made me to do this” thing I suppose? A lot of hippies are also more into holistic medicine and all that, so it doesn’t surprise me. To each their own :3

I can’t speak on the emergency c-section thing that much since I’m not too familiar with the process, but as a woman the idea of it being drawn or written about by a guy doesn’t bother me at all. It’s not offensive to depict such things.

My wife had an unmedicated birth, and there's a bunch of benefits.

One of the most important to her is freedom of moment. Epidurals numbs your legs too. From then on, you stuck in bed, laying down, the worst position to give birth in. Sorry, can't pace, move into different squats, go get in the tub. Going to the restroom is a big problem. The chance of complications goes up.

There's also a bunch of benefits she wanted that means not going to a hospital, thus you couldn't get an epidural. At a hospital, you don't know who's on duty. At your most intimate vulnerable important moment of your life, someone you've never met is putting their fingers up your privates to see how far along you at, mainly for their benefit. Doing it at home or a birth center, you build a relationship with your midwife and their team. You know and trust them through your pregnancy.

Another reason is that she's in control. She made a plan of how she wanted her birth to go. The midwives respected what she wanted. At a hospital, the doctors would be calling the shots. My wife had an 18 hour labor. At a hospital they prioritize their own risks over the experience of the mother. Assuredly, if we went to the hospital, they would have declared her "failing to progress", given her medication to make the labor more intense, causing fetal distress, then pushed her into a c-section. VBAC's are hard, and with my wife's age, she would never be able to deliver normally again. The hospitals policy of "Healthy mom, healthy baby" only accounts for physical health that's stat based, with little concern for mental health or long physical recovery. Other unhelpful outdated practices like episiotomies (which are shown to make recovery worse) could be pushed at a hospital. Or practices take place for the convenience of doctors (I don't want to work on Christmas, let's plan a c-section before then. Or shift change is coming up, so we are going to speed things up/slow things down for us. Etc.) When you hear someone's "I'm so glad I delivered at a hospital because X happened" horror story, ask yourself if the hospital caused X (though movement restriction, dietary restriction, medication, impatiences, etc)

My wife's friend gave birth in a hospital, and what's supposed to be the "golden hour" after birth was a nightmare. They took her child away, put him in a warming box and administered to him for 45 minutes, leaving Mom in the dark thinking her baby was dying, because his O2 stat was just 2 points out of range. It was completely unnecessary, and put both mom and baby under stress. Normally Mom does her first breastfeeding, and Mom's chest regulates baby's temperature, as hormones flow of pure love and joy. Midwives and birthing centers statistically have better outcomes for Mom and baby.

Another reason is differences of opinion of treatment of baby. Note that hospitals claim they do delayed cord clamping, but their idea of delayed is 60 seconds, when real delayed is 5-15 minutes. 1/3 of baby's blood is in the umbilical cord. It should not be pulsing and turning white before you cut it. Literally baby is transitioning from umbilical oxygen to using their lungs for the first time, and you cut off their existing supply. We both are strongly against circumcision, which hospitals attempt to push, on average 7 times, often to exhausted and medicated mothers. Even if they don't, many medical staff in the USA don't know that the foreskin should not be forcibly retracted. It's adhered to the glans for years. So that's a danger at the hospital to avoid, that you really don't have to worry with midwives. Lastly, while opinions on this are very strong on this topic, choosing not to do eye antibiotics, or hep b vaccine at birth is generally not allowed at hospitals.

Other benefits include going home/to bed after the birth, rather than being stuck at the hospital for an observation overnight. Another reason, like you said, is the raw experience. It's like asking why a marathon runner would do it, when you see them tired, hot, sweaty, and aching. Like TheVelvetMoth said above, it's a proud things too, like completing a marathon. And I did forget that the medicate given can cross over to baby. Also epidurals can go wrong, giving you none/partial benefit with all the drawbacks. Or permanent nerve damage. I'm sure I could probably come up with a dozen more pros/cons, but I've rambled long enough.

I'm not saying a hospital birth can't be a joyous, problem-free, experience. I'm sure many love their birth, but from our own experience and the stories told to us, the epidural is a big tradeoff, one that isn't worth it to my wife.

I hope that helps! Feel free to ask me anything about our thoughts/experience :3

At work right now and haven't read it yet but I totally forgot husband's perspective! Thank you for bringing that to my attention

That's all from my wife.

As for my (the guy's) perspective, you're the birth partner. You aren't laboring like your partner, but you've got a tough job. Providing constant support, counter pressure, encouragement, etc. I didn't leave her side the entire time, which means I really needed to go to the restroom by the end! I guess at a hospital, I'd be just doing what my father did: sitting on the bench. Instead it's was a privilege to be part of it. Truly a wonder. It may have been much harder, but often harder things are worth it :3

This guy gave great answers that I totally agree with as a woman maybe wanting kids someday.

Yeah, my wife is very glad she did it. Despite it being a very long, very intense delivery, she looks back on it fondly. I'd really recommend a birth class beforehand, as they can give pain coping techniques so that you don't panic and stay in control. The only thing we would change is that we didn't understand how long stitches would take. Turns out a long time. We would have ensured the comfort of the 3 of us, before starting stitches.

That's wonderful. I'm so glad your wife & you had a mostly good birthday experience.

Don't forget how much the hospital charges you for their devilish and hasteful methods.

I'm childless but also a fence-sitter. Idl if this counts.
In theory I'd love a natural birth & it's also what I gave my female star character. Though in her world, it was easier for me to manage her pain due to the existence of magic.
I'd want a home water birth with a midwife or doula because:
Easier on baby
More comfy for me, baby & hubby
Easier to bond
I'm crunchy
I'm traditional
Birth shouldn't be treated like a medical emergency unless one arises imo
I would use natural pain relief but might try other things like laughing gas & save the epidural for a last resort if I needed to & that was an option.

Since I'm not a mom, I would just like to react to this bit :

Is there a "right" way to incorporate traumatic elements? Say an emergency C-section; is it disrespectful for me, a guy, to have that be a parts of a character backstory? Is it disrespectful to women who have experienced such an event?

I seek such elements for variety as all my characters thus far have had uncomplicated births, BUT I worry if I'd be crossing a line adding a traumatic element that I havn't the right to use.

They're your characters, do whatever you want if you feel like it adds to the background of said character and makes the story more interesting, and more enjoyable for you to write. You have the right to use whatever you want for your characters, make them go through whatever traumatic events you'd like and write them the way you want.

The whole 'can I write about x since I'm not/will never experience x' is something that I find baffling, to say the least. Writers have been writing about what they are not and will not experience directly since humans invented writing, and, before that, we did the same through oral traditions and legends. And the big problem with that question is that it can always be taken a step further : what rights do you, a guy, have to write about pregnancy, since you'll never experience it ? What rights do you, a guy, have to write about women in general, since you're not one ? See my point ? So, in my opinion, that's a question that no writer should ever be asking themselves, especially when writing about fantasy worlds.

Now, if you want to do justice to x when x is something that exist, in this case c-section or any other birth-related complication, then research it. There's lot of resources online written by medical professionals, and I'm sure you can also easily find testimonies, both written and video, from women who had such complications. That way, you will have first-hand accounts of the event, and can more accurately portray it if your goal is to make your writing as close as possible to what happens in reality.

Pain isn't always a bad thing. And we feel more than just pain. But the numbing causes us to not feel anything, not just pain.
I haven't had any complications but to be honest Is feel offended if you refused to write about them even if they fit your story. Why can't a woman who has had a C-section be in your story? That seems kind of mean. Are we no good to you? Why would you even consider that?

I don't think he's saying he won't write about it - at least, that's what I get from what I read. I think where he (and in a certain vain, myself) are thinking is that we want to do the subject justice. We want to recognize the traumatic elements, the good, the bad, everything - without it falling into a sadomasicist fetish pit. I think its more about finding the right...light?...in the telling of these stories so that there can still be beauty. There is a lot of depictions of natural births as these scenes of utter joy - and very little C-Sections shown as anything beyond emergency surgery. I don't know if that made sense - but I don't think pregfur was saying anyone was unworthy or anything.

As a mom I can say that sometimes you should abandon all of your beliefs just for baby safety. Doctor said to me that my baby has 3 dangerous umbilical loops around her neck. So I chose C - section for the safety. I wanted to give birth naturally but with said circumstances was unable to do so

Ohhh, let me ask my wife :3

I tried to have a med-free birth because I felt like that is what I was "supposed to do" for my baby.

I didn't understand what it was until months after the birth, but I ended up developing vaginismus due to the pain. My body was simultaneously trying to push my baby out, while also refusing to let him out... The doctor said we needed to do a C-Section because the pressure on the baby's head was too great to continue to wait it out.

I ended up getting an epidural after all, still failed to give birth, had an emergency c-section, and ended up still being able to feel pain during the c-section :u I wish I had gotten the epidural from the start lol

As for adding traumatic elements to a backstory, I say go for it. It might be a little awkward or cringey if the writing is poorly done, but it wouldn't be disrespectful or offensive to me. Maybe if it were fetishized, I personally would think it's weird, but there's plenty of kink content that could be considered as such, and I just avoid it if it's not to my taste. If it's a normal part of someone's backstory, I think it has potential to be a good thing. It could add a layer of realness and depth to a character.