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Exhaustion
8 months ago
Blancmark
neonraveYep, so that's the theme of this journal...exhaustion.
I feel like I have thoroughly messed up my diet, my exercise and my sleep schedule all in one.
I really can't keep doing this because I'm riddled with muscular fatigue, mental exhaustion, and just demotivated to even get up on the weekends. I don't know what the heck is wrong with me...be it depression, laziness or whatever else. However, I know this is definitely not who I am.
Thankfully I can at least see that and attempt to make a change. There is NO way I can sustain staying up late anymore. With a 7AM to 4PM job going to bed at 10 or sometimes as late as midnight absolutely destroys me. I have been far too reliant on things like celsius energy and such to keep myself afloat. I don't feel it's safe for me to drive on such little sleep, so there's another risk. I just want to exercise, start my day with a buzz of energy, work and then come home. Though that does not seem possible at the moment and it's very discouraging.
I must continue with my exercise routine to lose weight and to keep a balance in my life. I am stress eating, I think (not sure as I have no way to test) I have high cortisol levels. I don't ever really feel at ease, I'm always sort of nervous and under tension. No doubt my moods are a result of lack of sleep and high cortisol.
Just...yeah, it's all a mess, I really don't like it, it's not a healthy life right now.
I love my friends with all my heart and I am very thankful to have those in my life that love me. I will always put them at the forefront of my life. However, I do need to be mindful and utilize "me time" also.
Hoping I can reset my life so to speak.
I feel like I have thoroughly messed up my diet, my exercise and my sleep schedule all in one.
I really can't keep doing this because I'm riddled with muscular fatigue, mental exhaustion, and just demotivated to even get up on the weekends. I don't know what the heck is wrong with me...be it depression, laziness or whatever else. However, I know this is definitely not who I am.
Thankfully I can at least see that and attempt to make a change. There is NO way I can sustain staying up late anymore. With a 7AM to 4PM job going to bed at 10 or sometimes as late as midnight absolutely destroys me. I have been far too reliant on things like celsius energy and such to keep myself afloat. I don't feel it's safe for me to drive on such little sleep, so there's another risk. I just want to exercise, start my day with a buzz of energy, work and then come home. Though that does not seem possible at the moment and it's very discouraging.
I must continue with my exercise routine to lose weight and to keep a balance in my life. I am stress eating, I think (not sure as I have no way to test) I have high cortisol levels. I don't ever really feel at ease, I'm always sort of nervous and under tension. No doubt my moods are a result of lack of sleep and high cortisol.
Just...yeah, it's all a mess, I really don't like it, it's not a healthy life right now.
I love my friends with all my heart and I am very thankful to have those in my life that love me. I will always put them at the forefront of my life. However, I do need to be mindful and utilize "me time" also.
Hoping I can reset my life so to speak.
