death cw

But my grandpa died a little more than a week ago. I always thought I'd see him degrade and spend his last days in bed like how you often see on old people but apparently everything was pretty normal, then a stomach ache and then gone.


I have lots of guilt because I moved to the end of the continent and I couldn't be there for him or for my grandma. Not to hug my family or attend the funeral. He was so incredibly loved by everyone and was the quirkiest charismatic man. The only time in my entire life I felt like I had a proper family life structure, with people who were loving, caring, proud of me and interested on spending time with me was some years when I lived with both my grand parents. I never saw them fight and I never had a bad time with them which is such a huge contrast from the rest of my life haha. I really think those were the best years of my life

Im still extremely annoyed that I'm not back home but my friends talked me out from getting in debt w credit to fly to my home country lmao so I'm like trying to calm tf down and stay home and just keep going on. And like im doing well but. Idk. Last year my sister and I chipped in and we brought them here to Argentina and they really liked it. My grandpa painted beautiful artwork on little stones he'd find and I've had them over my mini fridge. I kinda still can't look at them yet. I'll go grab the milk box and I'll look away bc I don't wanna face it lmao. We were on talks on having them move here and be a proper family but I guess that'll never happen.

Oh well ❤️

I'll get back on track & send everything x_x I think I have everything on the queue pretty much finished by now. Thanks for reading if you read and I'm extremely sorry that I said I'd send things like a week ago but this happened and I've been kind of *1000 yard stare at my home while inviting friends over so I don't have to think about this* omg just realized I'm typing too much. *Does a backflip*