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Let's talk about ghosting...
4 months ago
❀Azure's journal❀ I think most people are guilty of doing this and I'm not saying it's right. I've done it in the past and I think I've recently done it without realizing it. I get so busy, that I forget I have short term memory loss due to PTSD, and it's hard to respond to someone when they reply with one word, but they don't like small talk, and at the same time expect the other person to carry the conversation is exhausting.
I can't always carry the conversation. Believe it or not, I have my quiet moments too, and writing journals is very different from actual talking. It's like writing a letter to my fans, and it's not the same thing.
Friendship is a two way street and if people can't tell me if a decision I make bothers them, whether is leaving a Discord server, stepping away from things for mental health reasons, or that I just don't have time then I feel like the relationship isn't going to work. That's not how the world works. I don't mean to sound ablest, but I've mainly noticed this with some people that have trouble expressing themselves and talking.
It happens and I don't blame anyone, but if they have a issue, but won't tell me, then I can't fix it because I assume everything is fine, because no one said anything, I can't read minds. When someone isn't talking to me, I assume their busy or something. Communication is important for healthy relationships.
I know that I've been through a lot in the past few months, but I promise y'all, you are not bothering me. And if y'all were, I would let y'all know. I rarely ever get bothered by a simple conversation, unless a person is extremely rude. It's happened a lot in the past, and I usually just back out, unless they're a good friend of mine. I'll tell them when they're doing something that bothers me.
Don't get me wrong, I can relate to having trouble talking sometimes, but if people want a conversation, they have to put in effort, I can't be the only one trying to start a conversation. People have lives and I just don't have the time like I used to anymore with everything going on in my life, I won't go into detail since I'm just not comfortable at the moment.
I feel like lately with a lot of artists I've encountered they come off as entitled and childish. I realized that I need time to heal from all the bad relationships I've encountered over the years, and also dealing with cyberstalking reopened old wounds. I feel like the only valid reason to ghost someone is if they're abusive, and I had horrible exfriends in the past. I think I just have trouble trusting people, especially online. I could be talking to a crazy person or something, but I've been more careful so I don't really have that issue anymore.
Also, I have a detachment when it comes to online. Unless, I'm really close with someone and that there's a bond and I spent a ton of time with them, I don't get attached to them. Some people find that cold, but I think it's a healthy boundary so I don't get hurt. I think more people should have healthier boundaries when it comes to online so they can stay safe.
Unless I had a call, met the person, or had a ton of texts for at least two years, I don't get attached. There also has to be similar interests and not necessary that people try stuff like me or similar styles, but I am very picky when it comes to the art I enjoy. I think I've been spoiled by BERSERK's artwork, and I don't like most hentai art (Unless it's done really well) or crazy proportions usually unless the artists has skills, it's nothing personal or anything.
I don't hate hentai, but I don't have a huge interest in it either. I never did, I think I preferred yaoi or yuri due to the romantic aspect and that it's usually not as gross, I mean sometimes it is with the way some people draw with the crazy proportions and the like. I really want to see more healthy straight relationships in art so I'm working on it myself. I did remember enjoying Josei. Maybe I'm just old fashioned, but that's what I enjoy.
With that said, here's an article I read so I don't ghost decent people in the future: https://medium.com/hello-love/8-rea.....t-cc8d984025c9 I realized I've done it without meaning to, because man I've been busy. But again, people need to let me know that they want a conversation, and aren't just saying hello or something you know? That's all I can think of. Thank y'all for reading, I hope y'all have a nice day.
I can't always carry the conversation. Believe it or not, I have my quiet moments too, and writing journals is very different from actual talking. It's like writing a letter to my fans, and it's not the same thing.
Friendship is a two way street and if people can't tell me if a decision I make bothers them, whether is leaving a Discord server, stepping away from things for mental health reasons, or that I just don't have time then I feel like the relationship isn't going to work. That's not how the world works. I don't mean to sound ablest, but I've mainly noticed this with some people that have trouble expressing themselves and talking.
It happens and I don't blame anyone, but if they have a issue, but won't tell me, then I can't fix it because I assume everything is fine, because no one said anything, I can't read minds. When someone isn't talking to me, I assume their busy or something. Communication is important for healthy relationships.
I know that I've been through a lot in the past few months, but I promise y'all, you are not bothering me. And if y'all were, I would let y'all know. I rarely ever get bothered by a simple conversation, unless a person is extremely rude. It's happened a lot in the past, and I usually just back out, unless they're a good friend of mine. I'll tell them when they're doing something that bothers me.
Don't get me wrong, I can relate to having trouble talking sometimes, but if people want a conversation, they have to put in effort, I can't be the only one trying to start a conversation. People have lives and I just don't have the time like I used to anymore with everything going on in my life, I won't go into detail since I'm just not comfortable at the moment.
I feel like lately with a lot of artists I've encountered they come off as entitled and childish. I realized that I need time to heal from all the bad relationships I've encountered over the years, and also dealing with cyberstalking reopened old wounds. I feel like the only valid reason to ghost someone is if they're abusive, and I had horrible exfriends in the past. I think I just have trouble trusting people, especially online. I could be talking to a crazy person or something, but I've been more careful so I don't really have that issue anymore.
Also, I have a detachment when it comes to online. Unless, I'm really close with someone and that there's a bond and I spent a ton of time with them, I don't get attached to them. Some people find that cold, but I think it's a healthy boundary so I don't get hurt. I think more people should have healthier boundaries when it comes to online so they can stay safe.
Unless I had a call, met the person, or had a ton of texts for at least two years, I don't get attached. There also has to be similar interests and not necessary that people try stuff like me or similar styles, but I am very picky when it comes to the art I enjoy. I think I've been spoiled by BERSERK's artwork, and I don't like most hentai art (Unless it's done really well) or crazy proportions usually unless the artists has skills, it's nothing personal or anything.
I don't hate hentai, but I don't have a huge interest in it either. I never did, I think I preferred yaoi or yuri due to the romantic aspect and that it's usually not as gross, I mean sometimes it is with the way some people draw with the crazy proportions and the like. I really want to see more healthy straight relationships in art so I'm working on it myself. I did remember enjoying Josei. Maybe I'm just old fashioned, but that's what I enjoy.
With that said, here's an article I read so I don't ghost decent people in the future: https://medium.com/hello-love/8-rea.....t-cc8d984025c9 I realized I've done it without meaning to, because man I've been busy. But again, people need to let me know that they want a conversation, and aren't just saying hello or something you know? That's all I can think of. Thank y'all for reading, I hope y'all have a nice day.
