So it has been a hot minute. Things have been bad this year for me. Not even going to try saying it in a nicer way, this year has treated me like dog s**t. There have been positives of course but unfortunately the negatives have outweighed the positives, which sucks.

I do not think I properly updated my Furaffinity about this, but last March I burned out completely. For a while, I couldn't stand looking at my drawing tablet, I didn't want to sit at my desk unless it was to play Palworld or ROA2 (Rivals of Aether 2), and also I spent A LOT OF TIME in VRChat, where I feel like is one of my few only safe spaces to feel comfortable with myself, which I do not know how to feel about in that regard truthfully. In fact, I barely have been doing anything I enjoy for the most part anymore. Without sounding dramatic, I'm just tired of everything lately.

I have made new friends this year, more than most years I have been in this lovely community, which I am very happy to have now that they are here. I am very grateful for all of them, they are all very sweet and I would not give them up for anything in the world. I wish I could think about the friends I made along the way......as corny as that might sound, but unfortunately the negatives have affected me to a drastic point this year for a multitude of reasons.

My previous journal stated that I am not dead, which I am not, I just am active at a snail's pace right now, even if I am doing a few comms every now and again. I want to make adopts, I want to make merchandise (even if I feel only me and maybe like four other people would want something Dorian related, it is still fun making), I want to get back on my feet, but I just feel so many obstacles hit me over and over again, and I wish I could do a better job describing it. I do hope that me not posting much anymore is bothering people, I am sure it might not be but there is always that thought in the back of my head that tells me "if you are not productive, you are wasting your time to do something meaningful", which is just how I was raised.

I apologize for the lack of me being here in general. Everything I had up to earlier this month has been uploaded by now, but it was half a year since I last uploaded anything art related here, that is not common for me. I will do my best to do better. It has been hard lately, I am sorry.

TLDR: I am trying my best to get better, it has been hard, I do appreciate all of y'alls patience with my issues.