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Honestly Struggling
4 months ago
But who isn't these days?
Really though, I am struggling bad. I don't know what is going on, but something has felt off or wrong since around November 2024. I have no energy. I don't look forward to anything. I just feel like I am on auto pilot and just going through the motions of the day to get it over with and closer to...well, whatever I am waiting for. Varaleo and I recently went to Colorado for our anniversary, and while yes, I had fun, there was just a constant nagging in the back of my mind. And if I didn't keep myself occupied, my mind would slip back into the dark.
Yesterday (July 8th) was extra rough because it would have been my Grammy's 79th bday. She died February 11th this year. Her death was pretty traumatic for me...so much happened that shouldn't have and I am still having trouble coping with it.
Anyways, don't worry about me doing anything drastic. I love my mom, Varaleo, my brother, and my best friend Zippo way too much to do that to them. So as long as I have them, you guys are stuck with me, like it or not. I just don't know how much I will be around/active, as furry stuff is just not that fun for me anymore.
Really though, I am struggling bad. I don't know what is going on, but something has felt off or wrong since around November 2024. I have no energy. I don't look forward to anything. I just feel like I am on auto pilot and just going through the motions of the day to get it over with and closer to...well, whatever I am waiting for. Varaleo and I recently went to Colorado for our anniversary, and while yes, I had fun, there was just a constant nagging in the back of my mind. And if I didn't keep myself occupied, my mind would slip back into the dark.
Yesterday (July 8th) was extra rough because it would have been my Grammy's 79th bday. She died February 11th this year. Her death was pretty traumatic for me...so much happened that shouldn't have and I am still having trouble coping with it.
Anyways, don't worry about me doing anything drastic. I love my mom, Varaleo, my brother, and my best friend Zippo way too much to do that to them. So as long as I have them, you guys are stuck with me, like it or not. I just don't know how much I will be around/active, as furry stuff is just not that fun for me anymore.
I know the fandom loses it's fun and charm, as it's part of the grand illusion known as escapism, but reality does hit hard.
Your grandma, much like mine, is with you in spirit.
You can't let this little furry army you've built die, the furry liberation movement needs you.
*Hugs*
I know it's been forever since I've even spoken to you, but rest assured I'm sending massive good vibes your way!
Maybe Covid had an effect on all of us, maybe it's just the environment around us leading us to this depression, whatever the reason, we always tend to find a way forward.