FA+
Shop
2025 Dumpster fire continues?
a day ago
¤ * ¤ * ¤ MY COMMISSIONS ¤ * ¤ * ¤
Prices and availability here!
Can use Paypal on request - preferred payment is https://cash.me/$EmiriZane
TERMS OF SERVICE
Another update for anyone reading these.
Quitting my job wasn’t soon enough. I was doing the PT prescribed and taking it very slow and easy, and taking the meds as I was supposed to. I was doing something completely ordinary that should have been fine to do, and I felt the telltale twinge in my back that said,”You fked up.” I said okay time for the muscle relaxant and max pain meds, with a nap in bed to sleep it off. I went to stand and I felt the single worst pain in my life. It felt like Zeus himself struck me with lightning, on my left buttcheek, on the Opposite side of all my previous pain. My entire leg was in the most excruciating searing blue white hot fire I’d ever felt in my life. I howled, and couldn't move my leg at all because of the pain. Kitra tried to help me up but even just her lightly touching it was blinding pain. We managed to get me to the other room to try relaxing and sleeping it off but the meds didn’t even touch it, so I, yes ME, requested we call an ambulance. T his pain was so bad that morphine wasn’t touching it. ER doc was a dismissive ass but once we got them to actually do a couple scans, they saw what happened and the neurosurgeon came and talked with me and put me in his first slot the next morning for microdiscectomy.
I’ve had herniated discs in my back for a few years and I’ve mostly managed alright with them, even the one that’s like 6mm x 13mm? iirc. That one, per the neurosurgeon, had already long herniated and filled as much space as it could. Therefore this new herniation chose a different spot, and had shot out so far and bad that it stretched out my sciatic nerve, hence the searing pain. The surgery was a massive success and I shocked the nurses on my floor by walking within a couple days of surgery. I had to stay down at my SIL’s house for a month and then we hobbled home with a very long drive use of all of the stops and rests out of the car I needed.
I’ve been going to PT and have some massive improvement but I still have a long way to go. Sitting is a limited venture, and standing very quickly is pretty painful, but I can tolerate more and more each day. My outside of my left leg, down to the last two toes, are all still pins and needles numb.
Because of all of the things that happened (grandma dying, my 40th passing by silently and unnoticed, permanent damage to my spine, etc), I’ve been struggling mentally as well. I’m still not okay to return to the workforce, and retail likely is not a viable option for me ever again. Kitra was forced out of the military- 23 years she served but because of hateful bigots, she couldn’t serve anymore. (They forced ALL trans members to either completely detransition or leave the military). We have a loss of income as a result so it’s gonna be tight for a little while.
I did start studying to become a medical coder, as we think that field will be a good fit for me. Many allow work from home, so I can stand and sit as needed, get up and stretch, walk to the kitchen and back for a glass of water, etc.
Physical therapy has been a godsend. We have figured out many ways I never learned to use my body right, and she’s helping me relearn healthier ways to move. I’d already been diagnosed with hypermobility but we have a pretty good hunch that I have Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, specifically hEDS. We are working with my medical providers to make that diagnosis but it would help to explain my chronic mystery gastritis, my idiopathic dermatographia, my IBS, and many other things I’ve dealt with over the years. Hopefully with that diagnosis, we can make some progress on other aspects of my health.
I’m still stuck in a holding pattern with my transition. Because our healthcare is from Kitra’s military service, they refuse to cover gender affirming care. They laid that decree down right as I was working with providers for my top surgery so that got thrown by the wayside. We thought we might be able to get around it with a prophylactic double mastectomy for me. I had a lumpectomy done in 2020, which came back as fibromatosis. I have several family members that have one of the genetic mutations for breast cancer, and one of my aunts died from cancer from that mutation, and one of my first cousins is battling some particularly persistent breast cancer from the same genetic mutation. My genetic testing came back negative so they refused to continue with the surgery. I can’t afford it or the HRT out of pocket so for now, I get nada. Hopefully it’ll change in the near future so I can get back on HRT.
Things with my family have been up and down. My dad had to get knee replacement surgery and it has had complications, including him being hospitalized for beginning stages of sepsis. He’s back home but the knee is still not healing and the doctors are trying to exhaust the last possibilities, including him potentionally being allergic to a component. His back issues are on hold until they can get his knee stabilized and under control. My sister has been on a similar (to me)self discovery journey with her health. She’s been masking and overperforming and is dealing with burnout and skill regression. Her allergies are insane. - she’s reactive to Balsam of peru, and has been diagnosed with hypermobility, DISH (diffuse idiopathic skeletal hyperostosis), psoriatic arthritis, and she and one of her docs suspect she has mast cell activation syndrome. She has been struggling with finding work that brings in enough income, without overdoing it and worsening her health.
It’s not been the best year for our pets either. We lost two of our three ferrets, Monkey, and Pocky. They both had terminal issues and were on palliative care (our three legged miracle ferret Chonk is also on palliative care) Sparkle, our special lil blind kitty, had some dental issues and had developed that tooth reabsorption condition so they had to remove all of her teeth except her canines). We did determine she had mycoplasma and we had knocked out her boogerfest for a while. We will see how long it stays like this. Chessie’s age is really starting to show - she’s on supplements and has been for years but her arthritis has gotten worse in a couple spots and she’s on a regular dose of meds to help relieve that some. We lost a few of our chickens. Our black Silkie roo Gojira succumbed to heat. He was fine when I left for a doctors appointment and when I came back, he was gone. Elsa, our white silkie, had persistent complications from her previous illness - the vet called it crop paralysis and we hand fed her for weeks, and she recovered but she never flourished. Tweak even managed to hatch a baby, but rats got baby Nia. So right now we are down to Pearl, the buff laced polish hen (who grew spurs when our roo Gojira passed), and Tweak, the very paranoid and flighty partridge bantam silkie hen.
I’ve been trying to steer clear of most social media, for my mental health. The political scene is so distressing, and living in such close proximity to DC does not help. I am still on Telegram and Discord, if any of y’all want to reach out or get in touch with me. I’d love to hear from folks! I am trying to check here more often as well, and I plan to upload more things to here, including my backlog of all the artfight stuff from this year as well as my feeble attempts at an art challenge last month.
Quitting my job wasn’t soon enough. I was doing the PT prescribed and taking it very slow and easy, and taking the meds as I was supposed to. I was doing something completely ordinary that should have been fine to do, and I felt the telltale twinge in my back that said,”You fked up.” I said okay time for the muscle relaxant and max pain meds, with a nap in bed to sleep it off. I went to stand and I felt the single worst pain in my life. It felt like Zeus himself struck me with lightning, on my left buttcheek, on the Opposite side of all my previous pain. My entire leg was in the most excruciating searing blue white hot fire I’d ever felt in my life. I howled, and couldn't move my leg at all because of the pain. Kitra tried to help me up but even just her lightly touching it was blinding pain. We managed to get me to the other room to try relaxing and sleeping it off but the meds didn’t even touch it, so I, yes ME, requested we call an ambulance. T his pain was so bad that morphine wasn’t touching it. ER doc was a dismissive ass but once we got them to actually do a couple scans, they saw what happened and the neurosurgeon came and talked with me and put me in his first slot the next morning for microdiscectomy.
I’ve had herniated discs in my back for a few years and I’ve mostly managed alright with them, even the one that’s like 6mm x 13mm? iirc. That one, per the neurosurgeon, had already long herniated and filled as much space as it could. Therefore this new herniation chose a different spot, and had shot out so far and bad that it stretched out my sciatic nerve, hence the searing pain. The surgery was a massive success and I shocked the nurses on my floor by walking within a couple days of surgery. I had to stay down at my SIL’s house for a month and then we hobbled home with a very long drive use of all of the stops and rests out of the car I needed.
I’ve been going to PT and have some massive improvement but I still have a long way to go. Sitting is a limited venture, and standing very quickly is pretty painful, but I can tolerate more and more each day. My outside of my left leg, down to the last two toes, are all still pins and needles numb.
Because of all of the things that happened (grandma dying, my 40th passing by silently and unnoticed, permanent damage to my spine, etc), I’ve been struggling mentally as well. I’m still not okay to return to the workforce, and retail likely is not a viable option for me ever again. Kitra was forced out of the military- 23 years she served but because of hateful bigots, she couldn’t serve anymore. (They forced ALL trans members to either completely detransition or leave the military). We have a loss of income as a result so it’s gonna be tight for a little while.
I did start studying to become a medical coder, as we think that field will be a good fit for me. Many allow work from home, so I can stand and sit as needed, get up and stretch, walk to the kitchen and back for a glass of water, etc.
Physical therapy has been a godsend. We have figured out many ways I never learned to use my body right, and she’s helping me relearn healthier ways to move. I’d already been diagnosed with hypermobility but we have a pretty good hunch that I have Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, specifically hEDS. We are working with my medical providers to make that diagnosis but it would help to explain my chronic mystery gastritis, my idiopathic dermatographia, my IBS, and many other things I’ve dealt with over the years. Hopefully with that diagnosis, we can make some progress on other aspects of my health.
I’m still stuck in a holding pattern with my transition. Because our healthcare is from Kitra’s military service, they refuse to cover gender affirming care. They laid that decree down right as I was working with providers for my top surgery so that got thrown by the wayside. We thought we might be able to get around it with a prophylactic double mastectomy for me. I had a lumpectomy done in 2020, which came back as fibromatosis. I have several family members that have one of the genetic mutations for breast cancer, and one of my aunts died from cancer from that mutation, and one of my first cousins is battling some particularly persistent breast cancer from the same genetic mutation. My genetic testing came back negative so they refused to continue with the surgery. I can’t afford it or the HRT out of pocket so for now, I get nada. Hopefully it’ll change in the near future so I can get back on HRT.
Things with my family have been up and down. My dad had to get knee replacement surgery and it has had complications, including him being hospitalized for beginning stages of sepsis. He’s back home but the knee is still not healing and the doctors are trying to exhaust the last possibilities, including him potentionally being allergic to a component. His back issues are on hold until they can get his knee stabilized and under control. My sister has been on a similar (to me)self discovery journey with her health. She’s been masking and overperforming and is dealing with burnout and skill regression. Her allergies are insane. - she’s reactive to Balsam of peru, and has been diagnosed with hypermobility, DISH (diffuse idiopathic skeletal hyperostosis), psoriatic arthritis, and she and one of her docs suspect she has mast cell activation syndrome. She has been struggling with finding work that brings in enough income, without overdoing it and worsening her health.
It’s not been the best year for our pets either. We lost two of our three ferrets, Monkey, and Pocky. They both had terminal issues and were on palliative care (our three legged miracle ferret Chonk is also on palliative care) Sparkle, our special lil blind kitty, had some dental issues and had developed that tooth reabsorption condition so they had to remove all of her teeth except her canines). We did determine she had mycoplasma and we had knocked out her boogerfest for a while. We will see how long it stays like this. Chessie’s age is really starting to show - she’s on supplements and has been for years but her arthritis has gotten worse in a couple spots and she’s on a regular dose of meds to help relieve that some. We lost a few of our chickens. Our black Silkie roo Gojira succumbed to heat. He was fine when I left for a doctors appointment and when I came back, he was gone. Elsa, our white silkie, had persistent complications from her previous illness - the vet called it crop paralysis and we hand fed her for weeks, and she recovered but she never flourished. Tweak even managed to hatch a baby, but rats got baby Nia. So right now we are down to Pearl, the buff laced polish hen (who grew spurs when our roo Gojira passed), and Tweak, the very paranoid and flighty partridge bantam silkie hen.
I’ve been trying to steer clear of most social media, for my mental health. The political scene is so distressing, and living in such close proximity to DC does not help. I am still on Telegram and Discord, if any of y’all want to reach out or get in touch with me. I’d love to hear from folks! I am trying to check here more often as well, and I plan to upload more things to here, including my backlog of all the artfight stuff from this year as well as my feeble attempts at an art challenge last month.
GROUPS I STAFF
**
**
