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Dearly Beloved...
18 years ago
General
*koushien siren* ATSUMARE!!! Pawaa Puro Kun no DS Koushien!
As you know, I always seem to have rough days... today is the FUCKING WORST of them ALL...I lost a friend, I keep (DAMN WELL CONSTANTLY) losing in my video games, I got NASTY cuts all over my body, today isn't going right at all... And, on top of that, I owe WAY too many gift arts. I can't handle it all... I feel like collapsing and dying in god's hands... if god doesn't kill me, my ever hurting heart will (depression, anger, etc.). So, this could VERY WELL be my last journal... EVER... besides, I haven't taken care of my body at all... so... good-bye...
Rest assured, when you're talking to yours truly here, you're talking to someone who should be able to relate on some level or other. God knows me and the whole concept of depression are (unfortunately) no strangers to each other.
I don't know if my method could work fur you... but, I find that making others laugh with my lame antics out here when I'm between art or animation pieces not only gives me something to do in the interim prior to finalizing a decision on the next project I'll begin work on, but also, it helps take my mind off of... erm, other things.
No question about it... I've definitely become a bonafied cyber junkie when it comes to the internet, and that's of course because dealing with others from a far can sometimes be a bit more simpler than the stress of "real" world face to face dealings with others.
Socializing doesn't always come easy, and neither does natural happiness either. But, here's something to bear in my mind (and, I really need to focus on this myself as well) life is a matter of valleys and mountain tops (AKA "highs and lows"). As long as there's another tomorrow, there's a chance fur a day that's better than the previous one may have been.
Taking life day by day, one small step at a times is about the best chance of being able to cope. And, when a day is going particularly rotten, looking furward to the end of that one, putting it out of your mind as best you can, and focus on tommorrow may potentially help prevent the dark void from consuming you.
Fur those who make you extremely mad, try your best to ignore them and focus more on those who do mean something to you, and have been cool to you. Everyone has their share of both friends and foes.
Heck, even animals in the wilderness have their natural enemies as well, same as people don't necessarily have only friends and no enemies at all. Doesn't even matter how likable a person you may be... if some jerk decides they wanna go out of their way and ruin your day, they do their part to make that happen.
But, you know, I firmly believe in life that just as the Internet has It's share of trolls, so to does the so-called "real" world. And, in either case, online or IRL, not feeding the trolls is probably a good way to go. Such types like that aren't worth get POed over... life's too short anyways.
I don't know how much of what I'm saying here helps your specific situation, but at least trust me on this much... whatever is going wrong, I got your back. I'm behind you 120 percent. I wanna see you beat whatever it is that's making you feel the way you're feeling.
You deserve better.After all, EVERYONE deserves at least some level of basic human respect. And, if there are those you're dealing with who perhaps may not feel the need to respect you, then by that same token, your likewise not obligated to respect anyone who doesn't feel the need to respect you on some basic level.
Try not to let those who would live to troll on you win out over you. Try to forget such people like that. (If that's the problem). And, try to focus on the things and people that DO make you happy.
If you need to take a breather from FA fur a bit to clear your head or something like that, It's cool, I can understand that I suppose. But, please, don't leave FA entirely. In fact, even if It's anyone right here on FA giving you a hard time or something, I sure hope that doesn't really make you leave altogether fur good permanently.
Again, I sure wish I had came here sooner. What it is, if there's some way I can rescue from the problem, I'll help in whatever way I can. Honest. Like I said, I got your back. I'll not throw you to the lions or leave you fur dead or anything like that out here.
Again, don't go away altogether. Try as best you can to keep on keeping on.
And, as far as gift art requests go... if you're as backlogged on that as you sound like you are, then yeah, maybe take a break from that fur a whiles if need be.
Unless people paid you money to commission you fur gift art, they won't lose any money in the gift art requests even if you didn't get around to them at all.
They could possibly be a tad disappointed, yes... but at least no cash would be lost on commissioned art by them. Besides, if you have more pressing matters IRL, I'm sure any reasonable sort would understand. (At least, I sure would hope so anyways).
I sincerely hope my words were of at least some comfort to you at a time like this fur you. And, whatever you do... don't ever lose sight of the fact that you DO count fur something... both here on FA and IRL.
Try to listen to naysayers less and believe in yourself a bit more.
You know, even if a person has one truly good friend in life... well, Isn't that enough really? After all, I think friendship has nothing to do with quantity and EVERYTHING to do with quality.
Quoting Ernest: "Hey Vern, know whut I mean?" ^.^
*Hugs you tight* So remember... the game plan in geneeral goes like so... live fur today... when today sucks, live fur tomorrow. When "tomorrow" becomes "today", then start over from step 1.
Repeat as often as necessary, or desired. lol *Give you noogies*
Peace out... and please, take good care of yourself, 'kay? L8rz furend.
Erm, no wait... that's not how it goes! Umm... Aww wells, you know what I meant. ^.^
Anyways, maybe I "hardly know you", but I know that sappy as may sound, it's still no less true what they say...
We are all one. People sometimes are so busy judging others based on that person's differences from themself that all they ever see what is different rather than that which is the same.
No matter what species, no matter what racem, no matter what gender, no matter what walk of life, no matter what midset, we all have basic needs.
Being loved or at least respected and appreciated by others tends to top out that list. And again, when all is said and done, we are all connected by common ties in one form or another... we all have hopes, fears, dreams, happiness and jubilation sometimes, sadness and despair others.
That's why I say that when all is said and done, we are all one. No matter what, no matter what differences in appearance, belief system/personal ethics, likes/dislikes, etc... we are all one.
But then, they say there are no dumb questions... only dumb waiters. ^.^ *Hugs back*
Doesn't even matter if It's someone younger than me, when I make up my mind to be sub to someone, nothing else more matters.
Even with the whole little brother/big brother RP scenario, if it becomes a situation where I'm being dominated, I don't really have a problem with that.
^.^