I had to put down my pet tegu today. He had this weird disorder/complex because he didn't made the proper transition to his new food and starved himself. He wouldn't eat anything. In order to end his suffering, I put him down myself. I don't feel happy about it: it feels like a part of me is gone. I know I had to do it, I loved him and he loved me, but it had to be done. I get images of his body and eyes shut randomly and I tear up. I don't want to work or write papers right now. I really don't.