Family conflict is, by its very definition conflicting. At what point does family stop being family? When does the person you love turn into the person you hate? Personally, I’ve had very few ex’s that I could stand to be around. What was love became resentment, which became cold, hard, hatred.

Well folks I’m watching it happen in my family right now. I think, as a child to them, it’s important that I tell myself I am not responsible. Should my parents divorce I would like to think that I had no part in it, and what happened was what would’ve happened anyway. At the same time though, I feel a biased anger towards one of my parents, which may be driving my motivations and words of advice with the other.

Today I was witness to one hell of an argument between them. At points like this my usual reaction is to drink until I don’t care about anything. This wasn’t a possibility, so I lay here, typing now, before going back to sleep, or trying. I can sleep very well. It’s not my life that’s breaking into two. It does affect me, but some part of me cannot help but feel responsible for it.

Ah well, feel like crap. Things are on the horizon that my father (try as he might) cannot stop. I shall be trying to draw a picture that captures the conflict that one feels as he explains to his father the grim reality of the world. Imagine the sun, burning with fire on the outside, but then make it hollow, and fill it with ice. That’s how I feel. And now the fire has burned out, leaving a dead, ice-filled husk.

There are things we all do, that we should never have to. Choices made, that should never have had to be made...

Good night, and happy days all ;3