My sister, why do I even bother? [Slight Rage] -- IshyTycoon's Journal -- Fur Affinity [dot] net

My sister, why do I even bother? [Slight Rage]

15 years ago General

The thought of the day...

My sister is now 31 years of age, has been on and off of drugs, not very good living conditions, and the best part has given up her own son for adoption (to his uncle, even though I haven't seen him since). She has separated herself from the family, blaming us for the fact that she doesn't talk to us, I haven't seen her in two years.

Now, here is where I want to rip out her spleen and set it on fire. She's having a baby...not just a baby, but a baby by a guy she's dated for 4 months and she is keeping it. Excuse me? She gave up HER OTHER CHILD because she isn't responsible enough to take care of him and now it's okay that she has another one because....? There IS no reason. Myself and our oldest sister are just flabbergasted with the fact that she thinks it's a good idea to bring another life into this world when you gave up on the first one.

I just, I can't comprehend why she would do it.

21 Comments

Scyilla ~scyilla

Shork

15 years ago

Wow.... D:

PotatoKid ~potatokid

Traditional Artist

15 years ago

Keeping this second child may be a good thing for her. She may feel really guilty for giving her first son up. My bio mother and father had to give up my brother and sister and me and they hated themselves for it, even though it was mainly beyond their control. My dad adopted his new wife's daughter a few years later and he turned out to be a great father. My bio mother was physically incapable of having kids and her husband didn't want any so she focused on cleaning up her life and finding Christ. My adopted mom (who turned out to be abusive) would only let them see us once a year and only send us gifts/cards for the holidays but they kept up with that since they knew we would come to find them when we became adults, which we did. We all have a fairly good relationship with them now.

I guess my point is that she may actually be hurting and feeling guilty about the whole thing and talking to you guys makes it worse - so blaming you guys is easier for her than blaming herself for whatever. My bio mother feels guilty about having an abortion after me because she knew she couldn't care for the kid, even though it was technically the right thing to do being poor and having drug problems. (My bro and sis came out anyway.)

She may not feel guilty at all. But I guess from my experience I would be willing to bet it's the case.

Either way I hope things work out between you and your sister. Even though you are the aunt to her children I hope you still try to be in both of their lives.

IshyTycoon ~ishytycoon

Anime Artist

15 years ago

To put it simply, she's one of those "only bad things happen to me, so pity me" kind of people. She seems to think that everyone is out to get her and make her life miserable. Which seems to also account for her son, who has severe ADHD, so he doesn't pay attention in school and is hyper beyond compare. While the only thing my sister would do is yell at him for not getting anything done. Kids like him need lots of exercise to get out that energy they pent up in the day sitting in a chair, but she wouldn't have any of that kind of advice.

After the shock passed that she had put her son up for adoption, it was truly the right thing to do, she really isn't fit to be a mother for more reasons then what I have said in the journal. I just don't understand why she would think it's a good idea for her to bring another child into this world, he/she could end up with as bad ADHD as my nephew and I know she can't stand it, so I'm afraid she'll get tired of the baby and put my niece/nephew up for adoption like how she did to her first son.

I really hope that I'll be able to see my nephew, but it's hard to do so when your own sister keeps you away.

PotatoKid ~potatokid

Traditional Artist

15 years ago

Ahhh, yeah. That makes more sense. Still, all you can do is try to be there for them if possible. This sort of situation with the family is stressful and delicate so I honestly wis you the best of luck throughout the whole ordeal.