Continuing from where I left off...

Midey and I did go to a party, which DJ Mixer held at his place with his roomies, the 'Fuck AC' party. However, I'm mostly wishing I'd decided not to go, or had somehow convinced Midey to let me stay at his place. Why? Well, to start, again, stuck in a house full of strangers, who seem to all know each other. Lovely, people all engaged in an almost non-stop conversation, which makes it awkward for me to interject.

On top of that, there was the rather large number of alcohol bottles everywhere. I am 22, so I could drink, and I wasn't driving, so it wasn't an issue...but it was all pretty hard stuff. I might be a wuss, but I don't like the taste of alcohol. It makes my mouth taste horrible, and often, the harder stuff burns my tongue and throat. I didn't notice a large number of drunk people, thank god.

However...there was the rather prolific drug use I spied. Now, I'm anti-drug myself. I've NEVER touched drugs, tabacco, etc, of ANY kind. Period. Yeah, strange as it sounds, I've been clean from the day I was born, to this moment right now. I've never laid hands on a single cigarette, pipe, or any form of drug paraphanelia (sp?). And people at this party were smoking/inhaling/huffing/whatever the fuck they call doing drugs these days, all over the place. I couldn't even go out back without my nostrils being assault by cigarette smoke. I was told that almost all of DJ's parties are like this, which was a surprise to me. Again, I didn't care that they were doing in, I don't judge them. If they want to do stuff that can mess them up, that's their right. But man, the smell was KILLING ME. >_<

The one last thing at the party that really erked me, was the dry-erase board. Yeah, bear with me. I was feeling bored as shit, and noticed the dry-erase board, which people had been drawing on. Mostly silly shit and all. I decided, on a whim, to doodle on it. I know that my artistry abilities are severely limited, and so, I drew the one thing I remembered how to draw (sorta) from memory: EM. (For those of who who don't know EM: http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b.....m/UNKNOWN.jpg)

Well, I drew him from just below chest level up, as best as I could remember him. It wasn't good, and it's hard to color in both his hood AND his coat, since dry-erase sucks with shading. But I did it, and wrote two lines above him. I felt pretty proud of myself. I mean, I hadn't drawn him in ages, hell, hadn't drawn at all in ages.

However, I had the unfortunate luck of coming from the bathroom, to hear people talking, and they were commenting on my picture. I didn't hear anything specific, but they were laughing. Understandable. It was a horrible picture IMO, and I didn't expect ANYONE except for probably two people to recognize EM. I went around past, to get a drink, and got pissed when I glanced at the board. Why? My art had been defaced. I can imagine someone erasing him, that would've been fine. But no, someone had to ruin it by defacing him. They did that stupid 'chargin' laser' face and shit.

That made me miffed. I was tempted to take my anger out by simply erasing everything on the board, or defacing it all in retaliation. Yeah, immature, but I was upset. Then, I later learned who had specifically done it: The RGHU. Wow, an artist who I knew, not personally, one I respected for his work, decides to randomly wreck someone else's piece.

I do realize that my reaction is probably unwarranted and silly, but it's hard. I mean, I try my best to do what I can, given what limited ability I've got, and what happens? My piece is ruined because he wanted a laugh, or to get his friends to laugh. Ugh, I dunno. In general, the only nice thing about the party was the anime they showed. I just lounged on the stairs and watched it. In all honesty though, the next time such a party occurs there, I'm leaving myself out of it. It was, at best, a waste of time, and at worst, adding to my building stress.

In other notes, I finally got my UC Davis classes registered. I'm taking 4 classes, and my Mon/Wed/Fri's look really busy. I'm equal parts nervous, excited, and worried. I know it's going to be a lot more work, and it's going to be tough, but I want the major, and the degree. I also need to write...about 20 pages as part of the application for the creative writing class. I've had a few people, most notably Kitler, ask me why I'm doing it, why I'm still living with my folks, so, I'll explain my living situation right here and now.

I'm living with my parents, because I was living on my own, in an apartment, 3 years ago. My folks and I were not getting along, to put it lightly. We mutually decided that my staying in the house was a bad idea. My parents found an apartment in town, and agreed to pay for my rent, and a few other expenses, if I got a job, and paid for my utilities and part of my car insurance.

As time went on, I realized I wouldn't be able to become independent. I was only making minimum wage, and even if I was working 40 hours a week, I wasn't making enough to cover all my expenses. Then, about a year ago, the rent jumped by over 80 dollars. So, my mother made an offer. I could move back into the house, if I continued my education (I wasn't going to school while I was in the apartment), and she would pay for my expenses, and send me to UC Davis. I would have to follow the rules of the house, though compromises were made, as I wasn't the same person I was 3 years ago.

My mother and father and quite strict, compared to most parents, I admit that, and they'll even admit that! But they do quite a bit more for me than most parents EVER do. And they're sending me to one of best universities in CA. However, apparently this baffles people. I was asked once by Kitler if I really wanted to go to school, why I put up with my parents rules. I really didn't like that.

Sure, I don't like the rules and various restrictions, or the lack of freedom and privacy I use to have. But I want the education. It also looks good on a job application. Having the education will make me a better writer. And if I moved out, where would I go? People tell me I should leave.

Fine, then YOU tell me where I should go! Tell me where I should move to, or better yet, give me an offer. Don't try to tell me I should leave if you can't help me or give me a place to stay! It doesn't help me to just tell me what YOU think works. Really, I don't need you to worry about my best interests. You can't help me. I appreciate the concern, but I'll be fine.

I think I'm done for now.