The only thing I've always been able to feel fully is hate... anger, rage, wrath.
I felt powerful, when I'd let it fill me. Like a cool fire. And I know it's.... dangerous, to depend on it.
When I would get angry, even if I was holding back, everyone around could feel it. Many would be afraid.
When I tried to be anything else, like remorseful, like when I got in trouble in school, I wonder if it looked like an act to everyone. A bit of dramatics.
I'm told I'm a good actor. Apparently, such an actor, I can't tell when I am acting or not.

When I'm really angry, I never raise my voice. It was just fury.
Everything else is hard to feel.

Restlessly dreaming.