just wow
you know when you find some thing out and it just knocks you over?
yeah that happened to me the other day
i'm at work and i'm filling DOG SICK
so i'm really quiet and kinda depressed cause i'm taking calls from assholes and i'm dizzy as fuck
well at first break we are all standing around
i'm having a cig to try to calm my nerves from the shit handed to me the night before
and all these people are askin me "whats wrong"
i'm like just a lil sick
then they keep sayin how i'm the positive one
i'm the one that keeps every one happy during the day
yeah it knocked me off my feet!
... well not literally ...the trying to eat did that lol (yeah i ended up throwin up after that and had to leave)
but when you have all these people saying such positive things its kinda scary
i just thought i was there and another face in the crowd like every one else
feeling small then having people askin why you're not uppy uppy is weird
lol i literally dont know what to say
i come in the next day still dizzy and out of it and everyone keeps askin if i'm ok

then last night i have one of the most moving conversations with a close friend i ever had.
realizing that i mean something when people want me to feel small
it makes me realize so many other things
i love my life more now then i did about a week ago