im not sure what to make of my life. i still dont know what i want to do in college to be exact. soon i'll have to register for classes next semester, and i dont know what to take. my best friend idk where we're going. i feel this unbearable feeling of loneliness at times because of it. i feel like i have no friends and that im just really alone, i feel like crying when that happens. its kinda painful, like im dieing or something its too scary.

life is kinda slapping me in the faced with something hard and sandpapery, its gettin a little too much for me to handle. i might have to quit my job to focus and school, and A capella isnt going great people are droppin like flies and we have to perform on the news this mont and thats just another stressful thing to worry about. school work is piling up and i can hardly keep up. im surrounded by so many other excellent people in everything i do, art, math, singing,etc. i feel inadequate, like i'll never amount to anything thing close to them no matter how much i try, im just adverage. i show no talent in anything. i hate it, i hate my life.

i just had to write this down or something, i felt like if i didnt i was going to explode. thanks for listening...if anyone even reads this at all.